


Inevitable

by Trexi



Series: Ignoring the Hero Handbook [2]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Post-Season/Series 02, Relationship Reveal, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-19
Updated: 2019-08-04
Packaged: 2019-08-25 20:36:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 51,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16667869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trexi/pseuds/Trexi
Summary: Barry’s at the point where hiding his relationship with Len isn’t feasible anymore. The wedding ring is kind of obvious. But there are consequences for keeping secrets, something Barry knows all too well.





	1. Internal Affairs

Just keep your head down and aim for the stairs. Joe’s not here yet. Nobody will be looking for me this early. Just go straight to the stairs. Once the elevator doors open, don’t look up, don’t look around, just walk to the stairs.

The doors open. I take one step out.

“Allen! In my office now!”

Dammit. Dammit. Dammit.

“Coming, Captain.”

Don’t fidget with your hand. Nobody will notice it if you don’t draw attention. Who even looks at people’s hands anyway? Nobody, that’s who. Though maybe it would’ve been better on a chain around my neck. No. I’m not letting him win the argument. It’s fine where it is. Nobody’s going to notice.

Captain Singh doesn’t look up when I walk in.

“Close the door behind you,” he orders.

The blonde man sitting across from him glances up. He’s not Internal Affairs, right? I can’t tell. It’s not like I’ve broken any rules. I checked, double-checked, and triple-checked. Then I checked a few more times. I’m in the clear. I close the door and awkwardly wait for Singh to look up from his paperwork.

“Take a seat, Allen.”

I do.

“You know why you’re here?”

“No, sir.”

My voice most definitely does not crack. I’m a superhero for goodness sake. My boss doesn’t intimidate me.

Singh finally looks up. “You mean to say this isn’t why you showed up early for the first time in your life?”

The hopefully-not-IA-officer raises an eyebrow.

“I woke up early and figured I’d come in.”

Singh sighs. “Do you even know who this is?”

I look at the man who seems even less impressed with me than the Captain.

“Not Internal Affairs,” I guess.

Captain Singh drags his hand across his face, muttering something vaguely like ‘why me?’

“Is there a reason you’re thinking about Internal Affairs, Allen?” the man asks with a British accent.

“Uh, well, the Captain is always complaining that I’m late a lot, so I thought maybe he’d finally given them a call, which is why he wasn’t surprised that I’m in early today.”

Like always, Singh doesn’t look like he buys my excuse, and like always, he just moves on. “This is Julian Albert, CSI. He’s our new meta-human specialist, the one who will be sharing your lab and that I’ve been reminding you about for over a month.

“Right, I knew that. It just slipped my mind.”

“You mean you forgot,” Julian says.

“I had more important things to worry about.”

“Like what?” he asks.

I open my mouth to say exactly what before remembering where I am and closing it. “Personal stuff,” I mumble.

Julian scoffs. “Yes, well, it seems from the reports that you take a lot of time off for personal reasons.” He turns to Singh. “I’m sure you found those reasons acceptable at the time. I’m merely observing that Allen should think about putting work first for once.”

The Captain leans forward. “Despite his many, many shortcomings, Barry Allen is still one of the best CSIs I’ve ever worked with.” He thankfully ignores my slack jaw. “But perhaps you’ll be a good influence on his timekeeping skills. I hope to see you both develop a healthy working relationship.”

I turn to Julian, and for the first time I’m pretty sure we have the same thought: I doubt it.

“In any case,” Singh says, choosing to ignore our reaction, “all I need from you, Albert, is your emergency contact form and then Allen here can show you your lab.”

“Actually, could I have one of those too?” I ask.

They both turn to me, eyebrows raised.

I scratch the back of my head. “I meant to grab one Friday, but kind of forgot.”

“Does Detective West know he’s not going to be your emergency contact anymore?” Singh asks.

“Ah, well, I’ll get around to telling him. Len will have my head if I forget to change it now.”

Singh doesn’t seem to have anything to say to that and just hands me a spare form. I hesitate for a second, before filling out the name (Leonard Allen), relationship (husband) and phone number (he’s the one who convinced me to use the real one). My pen stops over occupation. Julian seems to notice and goes to say something, but I scribble ‘technician’ down before he can.

That’s accurate, sort of. I mean, the cold gun is pretty high maintenance and he manages that fine on his own. Plus, he’s created a fair amount of other cold-themed tech to match, like that stupid cold trap from Saturday. Thank goodness he took my name, but that’s only going to delay the inevitable by a little. The name change is only legal. Mick still calls him Snart, but Len doesn’t seem too bothered by it.

“Barry,” Singh says for once, “does anyone else know about this?”

“Ah, well, his sister and best friend do. They were our witnesses, but if you’re talking about, well, everyone else, then no. We didn’t have a ceremony, just went to the court house yesterday and got the certificate.”

He finally seems to notice my ring. “And how long are you expecting to keep this a secret?”

“It’s not a secret. I just haven’t really told anyone. In fact, I’m pretty sure nobody knew I was even in a relationship for the past year.” I laugh. “Joe and Iris are going to kill me.”

“Is this why you were early?” Julian asks, almost sounding disgusted. “Because you’re hiding from your friends and family?”

I straighten up. “I wouldn’t have kept this quiet for no good reason. I know them, and I know Len. It doesn’t matter how much I love him or how much I tell them that. They’re only going to judge him by his past. If you knew just how much I got that thrown in my face when they realised the two of us were just friends, you wouldn’t be questioning my decision.”

“Albert, I think you should head up to the lab yourself. Get settled. I need to speak to Allen in private.”

Julian looks torn between throwing a retort in my face or following orders.

He stands. “I’ll be seeing you around, Allen.” He doesn’t sound like he believes that.

I sink into my chair as Julian leaves.

“Internal Affairs,” Singh mutters, narrowing his eyes. “You were worried about Internal Affairs when you came in. What was his last name before he took yours?”

“I checked. I can’t lose my job over this. I checked before we even started dating.”

“His name, Allen.”

I sigh. “Leonard Snart.”

Singh doesn’t seem surprised, then again, I did hand in that form saying we were friends months ago. “How’d the two of you even meet?”

“It’s a long story.” He doesn’t seem deterred. “Look, we didn’t even get along at first. I tried hating him for everything that he’s done, but I realised how similar our situations were, how easily our lives could’ve gone down each other’s path. If Joe hadn’t taken me in…” I shake my head. “Len doesn’t have a criminal record.”

“He killed his father.”

“And he helped save Central City from Zoom. The Flash helped clear his record.”

“Yes, I’m sure that wasn’t the first time.”

He doesn’t know. He can’t know.

“Am I going to lose my job over this or not? Because I’m sure everyone I know is going to say everything you’ve thought of, and more, over and over again until they finally realise that I’m already married. I’m way past the point of rethinking the relationship.”

He sits back. “That’s why you haven’t told anyone.”

“They’re not going to change my mind.”

“I never said that.”

“Because trust me, Len’s already tried. I’ve never seen the man more terrified than when we started this. He tried for weeks to change my mind, to point out every single one of his flaws, to point out every single reason it couldn’t possibly work. I spent all that time assuring him that he was wrong, checking to make sure you can’t legally fire me over this.”

“I’m not going to fire you.”

“And I am sick and tired of being told that I can’t have happiness just like everyone else, that I can’t have my happy ending because my choices aren’t ideal. I’m sick of watching all my friends find their other halves, of going to their weddings, hearing about their love lives and not being able to say a word about mine, because they wouldn’t approve. They’re never going to approve, but I refuse to hide my relationship anymore. I refuse to tuck my ring away, out of sight, and pretend I live alone. I refuse to-.”

“Allen!”

I stop.

“Listen to me. I am not going to fire you. I do not think anyone’s going to change your mind about this. I am not arguing. I’m agreeing. I’ve no clue what you see in Snart, but you were right about your father, even when everyone else thought you were crazy. If you say that you love Leonard Snart, then I believe you. I won’t let you work any robbery cases where he’s a suspect, just like before, but it won’t otherwise impact your job. You have my word.”

“And if he’s arrested and charged?”

Singh sighs. “If Snart cares about you as much as you obviously care about him, then that won’t happen. The man has a sense of honour, however twisted it may be. He won’t jeopardise your job.”

I grin. “Thank you, Captain.”

“If marrying that man can get you to work on time, then who am I to complain?”

I laugh. “You won’t believe how much my chronic lateness frustrates Len. He’s started making date plans with half hour to hour delays to account for me.”

Singh smiles, then seems to realise himself, and settles back into a frown. “If anyone in the precinct gives you trouble over this, direct them to me. When West finds out… Just try to keep the yelling to a minimum. Some of us have work to do.”

“Of course. Well, I’ll go hide-. I mean head up to my lab.”

“Don’t let Albert bother you too much with this. I’d rather have two brilliant CSIs getting along than at each other’s throats.”

I nod but make no promises. It’s not like I’m purposely trying to not like him. It’s just instinct. And him being a pompous jerk.


	2. The Detectives

I smile at my phone. _‘Captain found out. He’s surprisingly okay with it.’_

_‘I’ll try not to shoot at him in my next heist.’_

Julian scoffs obnoxiously (because everything about this guy is obnoxious). “There a reason you’re on your phone instead of working, Allen?”

Singh wants us to work together. He’s my only ally in the Len situation. I take a breath.

“Sorry.”

“Didn’t think you were capable of the word. What with you thinking it’s okay to secretly marry someone when you have a family to celebrate with.”

“How do you know so much about my family situation, anyway?”

“I read your file. Something you would know if you had been listening when I said as much under an hour ago.”

“Then you’d know that my family is … complicated.”

“Everyone’s family is complicated, Allen. That’s what makes them family.”

I force myself not to roll my eyes. I’m pretty sure having an evil rival speedster from the future come back and kill your mother when trying to kill you isn’t the normal kind of complicated. And that’s only the start of it.

“I don’t want to hide it from them, not really. I’d just like to avoid the fallout for as long as possible.”

“You do realise that will only make things worse, right?”

“Yeah, I know. I just want an excuse to gloat about him without them knowing who I’m talking about”

Julian finally looks up from his desk. “That’s why you’re wearing the ring.”

I shrug. “If nobody calls it out, I don’t have to face the disappointment.”

He shakes his head and goes back to setting up his belongings. “I still think you’re being an idiot.”

“You’re probably right.”

“Get used to saying that.”

I ignore that jab and get back to work. So long as I finish everything on time, Joe and Eddie won’t have a reason to come up here. I somehow doubt I’ll be able to convince Julian to take my reports downstairs though, and it’s not like I can superspeed through anything up here now. Len would be glad for that. He already thinks I’m too careless with the whole secret identity thing. That’s hilarious coming from him, who doesn’t even bother with a mask. This would be so much easier if nobody knew Leonard Snart was Captain Cold, even if he’s an Allen now.

Julian stops shuffling things around and walks into my peripheral.

“Did you need something?” I ask.

“Well, I am the CSI for the meta-human taskforce now. You happen to be the son and brother-in-law to the two lead detectives. I’m sure the Captain would want you to introduce me.”

“Are you going to point out the ring?”

He studies my left hand, no doubt taking in the intricate silver and gold wrapping around each other. “You know, if you wanted to save on the ceremony, you-.”

“Money’s not the problem.”

“Of course it isn’t. You inherited Star Labs from Dr Wells.”

“How’d you know that?”

“Public record.”

“Do you do background checks on all your future co-workers?”

“We’re in law enforcement, Allen. It should be standard.”

I lock my computer and stop myself from superspeed mocking him. “Fine, I’ll introduce you to Joe and Eddie.”

“Detectives West and Thawne. Do try to be professional.”

I’m literally married to a supervillain. I threw professional out the window years ago.

Obviously, I don’t say that.

I force a smile. “Let’s head downstairs, then.”

Julian walks on my left. Any way to subtly draw attention to that hand, huh? I see how it is. I’ll be so sure to be in a good word after work. Joe’s always been hard on those who would ever dare cross his kids.

It seems that everybody has arrived since I escaped to the lab earlier. Nobody looks twice at the new CSI beside me. Julian doesn’t seem to mind, just follows me to Joe’s and Eddie’s desks. The detectives are standing up, heads hunched close, talking to each other. Joe sees me first. He straightens, rubs his eyes comically and stares at me like I’ve grown a second head.

“Is that Barry Allen at work on time?”

I laugh. “It’s not that big of a deal.”

Eddie turns around. “I don’t know, Barry. You haven’t gotten here on time the entire time I’ve worked here.”

“I’m sure I have. You lot just haven’t noticed. I even got here early today.”

Joe’s smile falters. “Everything alright, Barr?”

“I’m fine, Joe. I just got myself a new alarm.”

Julian clears his throat.

“Speaking of new, this is Julian Albert. He’s the new meta-human specialist for forensics. He’s my new lab-mate and your new meta-human taskforce member.”

Eddie shakes his hand. “Detective Eddie Thawne.”

Joe switches from dad-mode to cop-mode. “Detective Joe West.”

Julian shakes his hand too, looking at my left hand the whole time.

Just when I think he’s going to mention it, he says, “I look forward to working with you. I’ve reviewed your previous cases, and I have to say I’m impressed by your quick adaptation to the meta threat.”

“Threat?” I question.

“Yes, Allen, threat. The ratio of criminal metas to innocent is rather disturbing. Even that imbecile in red has broken countless laws, though the CCPD turns a blind eye whenever he’s concerned.”

“Well, maybe the innocents don’t want to advertise their powers. We can’t know for sure just how many people the particle accelerator explosion affected.”

“Exactly, we still don’t know how many people are at risk. One would think the current owner of Star Labs would be working to rectify that, but he clearly has no idea what he’s doing.”

“We don’t want to infringe on the privacy of metas who want to live normal lives.”

“Perhaps your resources would be better spent towards finding a cure for this meta-human disease.”

I clench and unclench my fists. “It’s not a disease. Meta-humans are changed at the genetic level. We’ve already isolated the gene and created a test for it. We will not be releasing it to the public in order to prevent discrimination and hate crimes. If someone is concerned that they have the gene, then they can come to us for testing and help.”

“You really think anybody will go to the same people who caused this mess?”

“The person who purposely caused the malfunction is dead. Star Labs has been doing our best to make up for his actions since we found out.”

“And they’ve offered their continued support to the taskforce,” Joe says.

“Cisco’s tech has been an invaluable asset,” Eddie adds.

Julian scowls. “Yes, well, I’m sure they have to find some way to assuage their guilt.” He pointedly looks at me. “But that doesn’t excuse keeping the meta threat a secret for as long as they did.”

“Why’re you blaming Barry for?” Joe asks. “He was only a patient back then.”

Julian raises an eyebrow. “Right, struck by lightning in our lab. Suppose I should be lucky it won’t strike the same place twice. Regardless, I’m a firm believer that secrets become more dangerous the longer they’re kept. Things wouldn’t have gotten so out of control two years ago if Star Labs had just come clean in the first place.”

I try not to react to his obvious double meaning, but Joe must notice my eye twitch.

“Well, nothing can be done now. I’m sure Star Labs isn’t keeping any more secrets.”

“Maybe not Star Labs.”

Eddie glances at me, his eyes trailing over me as if checking for injury. He must notice the ring because his eyes widen suddenly then lock on mine. He looks to Joe then back, an obvious question. I subtly shake my head. He seems to silently scream ‘Bad Idea’. I smile and shrug a little. Thankfully, Joe’s too busy trying to figure out Julian’s meaning to notice the interaction.

“Actually, Barry, could I talk to you about something for a second?” Eddie asks.

 “Sure. We can head up the lab.”

“Yes, Allen, it is okay for you to use our shared workspace for a private conversation. Thanks for asking.”

“It’s case related,” Eddie says. Joe inclines his head. “Uh, just something I’m looking at on the side.”

Julian looks sceptical but says nothing.

Eddie all but drags me upstairs. He steps inside, looks around, and closes the door behind us. I try to edge towards my desk and away from the still-slightly-in-shock detective.

“Barry!” he loudly whispers. “Is that a wedding ring?”

I sigh. “Yep,” I say at a normal volume.

“It’s yours?”

“Yeah.”

“You’re married?”

“That is kind of the point of a wedding ring.”

“Are you insane?” he stalks up to me. “Why haven’t you told Iris? She’s going to kill me that I found out first.”

I laugh. “Think she’ll be too busy simultaneously killing me and trying to figure out who he is.”

“You…” Eddie shifts from shocked to serious. “How long?”

“Have I been married? Less than 24 hours. We left the courthouse after lunch yesterday.”

“And before that? How long have you even been in a relationship?”

“Little under a year. I know it seems kind of rushed, but we knew each other pretty well before we got together.”

“As in…”

“He knows I’m the Flash. And trust me, he’s not going to tell a soul.”

“Right, right. So… What the hell were you thinking? I just knew you had to be in a relationship, but you kept denying it. Why am I the first to hear about this? I am the first to hear about this, right?”

“The captain knows. Had to change my emergency contact this morning.”

“And Julian?”

“Knows I’m married, knows I haven’t told anyone, and thinks I’m an idiot for it.”

“He’s not wrong. I know from experience how hard keeping a relationship secret can be.”

I smile. “Yeah, but for me and him it’s mutual. We’ve talked about it, a lot. He doesn’t want to face the fallout as much as I don’t. If you knew who he was, you’d understand.”

“No chance you’ll tell me?”

“Afraid not. You’re already going straight to Iris after this, then probably Joe. They’d both kill you if you didn’t.”

“You could just call a meeting and tell everyone at once. That way nobody kills anybody.”

I shake my head. “I can’t do that, Eddie. It’ll be bad enough that I’ve kept this a secret in the first place, but it’ll be so much worse if they knew who exactly I was protecting from my hectic life. Because that’s just it. We’ve had so many people infiltrate our team and target my loved ones. I won’t let him get pulled into that. He might know my secret, but he doesn’t have to go through that same risk everyone else does.”

“So he doesn’t want to join in the action, then.”

“He wants nothing less.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“I won’t tell anyone yet. I’ll definitely tell Iris and Joe about the ring, but I’ll act oblivious to the meaning, say you refused to spill, called it speedster business or something. I understand wanting to protect the person you love from this life, Barry. I really do. When you’re ready to tell everyone who that is, I’ll stand by you.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

Eddie smiles. “I married my partner’s daughter. I’m sure whoever your husband is has nothing on that.”

You have no idea.

“Thanks, Eddie,” I say instead.

Julian picks that moment to walk in. He takes in Eddie’s smile and scowls, before storming past us and to his desk.

“Right, well, I’ll see you later then.”

“Yeah, I’ll get the results to you by tomorrow afternoon.”

Eddie nods, obviously just now remembering his excuse, before waving at Julian and leaving. Julian doesn’t acknowledge the detective. He stares at me, an undefinable expression on his face. I sigh and get back to work.

I wait until Julian goes on his lunch break to text Len.

_‘Eddie saw the ring. He bought the keep-him-out-of-this-life excuse.’_

It takes a minute for Len to respond. _‘If you had just worn it on a chain…’_

_‘It’s too early for an I told you so.’_

_‘No regrets then, Scarlet?’_

_‘Never.’_

“BARTHELOMEW HENRY ALLEN!”

Sorry Captain, sounds like Joe’s up for some yelling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inevitable is going to be a lot less time-skippy than Exceptions was, mainly because I'm not writing it to line up with canon events. Considering everyone's going to eventually find out, any guesses for how it'll happen for each person (keeping in mind that Barry's a difficult human being and won't necessarily reveal the married thing and who he's married to at the same time)?


	3. Wests

I hide my phone and spin around on my chair. Joe slams the door open, Iris in tow. Eddie grimaces from the doorway and closes it from the outside, no doubt standing guard if Julian decides to come back early.

“Hi.”

Iris storms across the lab. “Hi? You’re wearing a wedding ring and all you have to say is hi?”

“Well, I’m not going to say bye and run away.”

Joe stands beside Iris, effectively blocking my escape; maybe that’s what Eddie’s actually for.

“You damn well won’t be running,” Joe says. “Let’s see it then.”

I hold my left hand up.

“You weren’t wearing that at Saturday Night Family Dinner,” he says.

“No. L-. He wouldn’t let me wear it before we got the certificate. We’ve had the rings for a couple of weeks now.”

Iris studies the ring. “You’re really married.”

“Legally, yeah. He took my last name, never really liked his own.”

“Which was?”

I pull my hand back. “You’re not going to get me to slip that easily, Iris.”

“So it’s distinctive then.” Iris turns to Joe. “I bet Singh would know.”

Joe shakes his head. “That doesn’t make sense. Why would Barry tell his boss about being married and to who before his own family? None of this makes a lick of sense. Because the young man I raised would never have gone and done something like this. He knows to share when he’s in a serious relationship. Considering marriage, that’s pretty damn serious in my book.”

“I could’ve hidden the ring. It would’ve been easier, but I wanted everyone to know that I’m irrevocably taken.”

“You think you’re off the hook because you didn’t hide that you were married too? You think that excuses what you’ve done?” Joe asks.

“You make it sound like I broke the law.”

Iris stares at me incredulously. “Barry, you got married without even telling us you were in a relationship. You would’ve had witnesses too for it to be legal. That’s two other people who knew when we didn’t.”

“Technically I never told those two. They kind of caught us cuddling on his lounge.”

“So it’s two people from his life?” Iris asks.

“His sister and best friend.”

Joe crosses his arms. “You realise how that sounds right, Barry? This man didn’t rope you into -.”

“I proposed. I kissed him first. I convinced him the relationship wasn’t doomed. The only thing he did first was say I love you.” I smile. “And he would not be happy that I admitted that. Thought he was going to implode or something when he let it slip.”

Iris catches herself smiling and forces a frown. “Why didn’t you tell even me, Barr? We’re meant to be best friends.”

“We are, Iris. Of course we are. It’s just that you would’ve been obligated to tell Eddie who would need to tell Joe-.”

“And I can’t know who my son is in love with?”

“It’s not like that.”

“Not like what? Because it sounds to be like you’re embarrassed by this man.”

“No!” I stand up. “I am not and will never be ashamed by my relationship. I wear this ring because I’m proud of him, of us.”

Iris smiles. “See the thing about a distinctive ring, is that it won’t be too difficult to find a match. We just have to go through all the guys that Barry trusts with his secret and check their hands.”

Joe chokes on air. “He knows you’re secret?”

“He’s known for a long time.”

“That much was obvious,” Iris says. “Barry wouldn’t be this serious about someone and not let them know about his nightly activities. Maybe he’s in the same occupation. I just have to narrow down the single superguys we know and-”

“Who said you know him?” I ask.

Hopefully that stops her from going down that train of thought.      

Joe scoffs. “We’re not idiots, Barry. Normally you’d be declaring your love within months of starting the relationship. Whoever this man is, we obviously don’t approve of him in your eyes. We can’t disapprove of someone we don’t know.”

“You don’t know him.”

I said as much when you both yelled at me for being friends with Len. It hasn’t changed.

“Listen here-.”

“No, Joe, you listen to me. You don’t know him. Look at me right now. Am I lying?”

“That doesn’t mean-.”

“It means that you don’t know him! It means that he isn’t at risk if another villain decides to target my loved ones. So I’m sorry if I’m being just a little selfish for once and protecting the man I love, but there is no way that I’m going to go around shouting his name from the rooftops. I wish I could. I wish I could invite him around to family dinner nights. I wish I could kiss him goodbye before every mission. But I can’t. I can’t risk that. Not with him. So be angry at me for keeping this a secret, hate me for not telling you about the relationship, do whatever you need, but leave him out of this. I’ve already lost too much. I can’t lose him too.”

Joe’s expression softens. “Barr, you can trust your family.”

I hate using this example, but…

“What happened when Cisco had to protect my secret? He’s my brother in all but blood, family, just like you two. But what happened when his blood brother was being threatened? What would you honestly do if it was Iris’s life or Wally’s or Eddie’s or even mine? Could you really keep my husband’s name a secret even then?” I look them both in the eye. “The people who already know had to. I had no choice in the matter. We paid an additional fee to keep our marriage certificate outside public access. We’re still each other’s first point of contact in an emergency, but that information is confidential outside emergencies. I can’t ask you to not look into this because I know you both too well. But please, if you do find out, don’t tell anyone. You’ll want to. I know you will. Just try and be a little happy for me that I’ve found someone who loves both sides of me equally.”

Joe sighs. “I’m sorry, Barry, but I can’t accept this. I understand your reasoning, I truly do, son. But you can’t expect me to just listen to you talk about this man without having a name or face to match him with.”

If you did, you wouldn’t sound so sad.

Iris watches her father leave and immediately pulls me into a tight hug.

“Barry Allen, you cannot begin to imagine how mad I am right now, you ridiculous, logical man. I’m going to hunt your husband down and demand to have him over for dinner with me and Eddie. You understand me? I won’t stop until I know who’s put that silly little smile on your face for the past year. Don’t think for a second that I haven’t noticed it. Whoever he is, he makes you shine even in your darkest moments. Between him and Snart, I’m up to here with your poor choices, but-.” Iris slowly pulls away. “No. He can’t be. You aren’t-.”

“Iris?”

“Give me your phone, Barry.”

“What?”

“Now, Barry Allen.”

“Why?”

“Because earlier, when you started saying his name, it was an L. Because I know exactly who Dad would never approve of. Because you got nervous when I was talking about the hero business. Because there’s someone else you’ve insisted that we don’t know even when we do. Because there’s a man, Barry, that you’ve grown close to lately, impossibly so, the same one you moved out for after Dad told you that you couldn’t even be friends with him.”

I swallow heavily. “Iris, think about this.”

“His sister and his best friend know. He hates his last name. He’d be embarrassed by people knowing he said I love you first.”

“What’d you want my phone for?”

“I want to read your messages to _Len_.”

“That’s unnecessary. They’re mostly just links to Flash Fails.”

“Then you won’t have a problem with me going through them.”

“You know, I’m pretty sure Julian will be back soon. Maybe you should head back to work.”

“Phone. Now.”

I sigh. “Fine, just… You can tell Eddie, but nobody else.”

Iris narrows her eyes. “Deal.”

I pick up my phone and access Len’s texts.

Iris immediately grabs it and grins. “Nice contact pic.”

It’s a snowflake that matches the charm on my phone case.

She scrolls through the messages for all of one minute before handing me the phone. And, of course, she’s sent a text.

_‘I know – Iris’_

Len has already texted back. _‘Go easy on him. He’s wanted to tell you since Christmas.’_

“Christmas, huh?”

“I might’ve first kissed him after Mardon and Jesse were handled.”

“When did you even see him?”

“He was waiting in my room when I got home, didn’t even return my mug.”

“He stole that mug?”

I laugh. “I think that was actually an accident.”

Iris shakes her head. “So this is real, then? You’re married to Captain Cold, Leonard Snart?”

“Allen. He took my last name, remember?”

“This is insane.”

“I got struck by lightning and got superspeed instead of dying. I think marrying a supervillain just goes with the job.”

“I’m pretty sure you’re the exception here.”

I shrug. “He’s good for me and me for him. I know it’s odd and that we shouldn’t work, but we do. And I wasn’t lying about protecting him through keeping his identity a secret. Nobody’s going to target one of my occasional villains and occasional allies. Len’s got a big enough target on his back without me adding to it, and vice versa.”

“I still think you should tell the team.”

“Not Joe?”

Iris sighs. “I honestly can’t imagine a future where Captain Cold is welcome in Dad’s home, but we can’t help who we fall in love with. It took Dad months to approve of Eddie and Dad likes him. I still want to have that dinner, my place tomorrow night, to determine my opinion. It’s the same thing I said when we thought you two were just friends though. I don’t approve of him, but I believe that you care about him. Maybe that’ll be enough. I’m still going to be mad for not telling me though. You’re lucky I figured it out at all. There would’ve been hell to pay if anyone else found out before me.”

“I’ll tell Len to not pull a heist tomorrow then.”

“Don’t. Not don’t tell him that, just don’t say something like that to me. I’m still processing the whole married to a supervillain thing. Casually mentioning his planned crimes is too much right now.”

“Sorry.” I duck my head. “And thank you. I’m glad you were the one to figure it out first, even if I wish it took you a little longer.”

Iris grins. “You should know better than to get past my reporter’s instinct, Barry.”

“I got past two detectives, and a police captain who only found out because he demanded to know Len’s previous last name.”

“Well, let’s see how long you last against Cisco and Caitlin. I bet under one night of crime fighting.”

“Please, I can make it to three.”

“You’re on, Barry. Loser makes their phone background a pic of their shirtless husband.”

“Fine. Prepare to have your boss scold you for unprofessionalism.”

“Allen talking about unprofessionalism? What a surprise.”

Julian shoulders past Eddie who, by the looks of it, definitely heard our deal. Iris hugs me and sprints out, immediately whispering to Eddie. The detective shoots me a look of surprise, before being rushed out by Iris.

It’s only halfway through the day and three people already know the full truth, while two know half of it. Maybe, just maybe, Len was right about the ring. He doesn’t need to know that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you think Barry will be able win the bet, especially considering that Len's got a heist planned for this night?


	4. In Lieu of a Honeymoon

“And worse, he doesn’t even like the Flash, or any good metas for that matter. I get not liking the ones working for Len or others tearing up the city, but what did any of the other metas do to him? They don’t even have metas in England. It’s not like the guy could’ve been personally wronged by one before.”

Caitlin looks like she’s holding back a laugh as I frantically eat my dinner, curtesy of Len, before any alerts can pop up.

“Are you sure you’re being offended on the behalf of other metas, or are you just upset to finally meet someone who doesn’t like the Flash?” she asks.

I almost choke on a piece of chicken. “What? No. People are allowed to not like me. Lots of people don’t like me. Like half the precinct hate me ‘cause of getting Len pardoned, and the other half put up with it because they don’t want to have to deal with meta criminals without my help. But Julian, Julian just dislikes metas in general, and the Flash specifically, _and_ he seems to hate me too, as in Barry me. At first it was because he hates Star Labs for some reason, and is pretty much the only person in Central who remembers that I technically own the place, but now he’s annoyed over the whole ring thing, even though it’s none of his business.”

“Ring thing?” Cisco questions.

I swallow the last of my food and speed into my uniform. “He seems to think we should be releasing a list of known metas, even if they haven’t broken any laws. I tried to explain why, but the guy just ignored me.”

“Well, that’s because…” Caitlin trails off. “Wait, what’s that got to do with a ring, Barry?”

“Normally I’d talk to Joe about the whole Julian thing, but he’s still mad at me, and I didn’t want him angry at Eddie too, so I just stayed away from both of them after work finished. Course Iris is mad at me too, but for a completely different, definitely unrelated reason.”

Cisco crosses his arms. “You promised to only use your power of deflection for good.”

“Deflection? What are you talking about?” I speed behind his chair to avoid eye contact, and shift from foot to foot. “Any alerts yet?”

“No, not until you tell us what you meant about the ring thing,” Cisco says.

“Oh, look, an armoured truck sent out an alert. Guess this conversation can wait.”

I leave Star Labs before either of them can confirm it, not that I was lying. There really is a crime in progress.

And it’s Len pocketing a giant diamond, of freaking course.

I skid to a stop. “Really, Cold? Out of all the things you could rob, did you really have to steal another diamond from another armoured truck?”

Len smirks, pointing the cold gun at me. “Well, I figured you’d appreciate the call back. I can always go rob a bank if that’ll make you happier.”

“That’s not what I meant, and you know it.”

“Then I suppose I should take this diamond home and get out of your hair.”

“If you even think about taking that thing home-.”

“Careful, Scarlet. Don’t say something you might regret.”

What? Oh. The comms are on.

“The only thing I regret was getting you pardoned.”

“Please, we both know that’s not true.”

“Dude,” Cisco calls over the comms. “Are you going to fight at some point or just keep chatting?”

I’m half tempted to say the latter, but Len is literally running away from our conversation right now. I give chase and immediately duck a stream of fire, leap over a stream of gold, and run right into an ice trap. I crouch down and reverse the trap, the exact same way Len did on Saturday.

“I do actually learn from my mistakes,” I point out, easily dodging the three streams, and laughing when Len’s grenade misses. “Too slow, Cold.”

“Never had to be fast to beat you, Scarlet.”

Mick’s shot goes wide. “Quit flirting, Snart.”

Lisa laughs. “Like that’ll ever happen.”

“Please, I’m a professional,” Len says.

I get close enough to slip the diamond from his parka. “You were saying?”

Len smirks. The ‘diamond’ explodes in my face. Ice grenade. And he fixed it to have full body coverage. Dammit.

“The hell was that?” Cisco asks.

I can’t exactly respond, even as Len’s smirk turns into a full-blown grin and he waltzes over to their bikes. “Catch you later, Scarlet.”

Lisa pulls the real diamond from her jacket and tosses it in the air. “Remind me not to complain when you choose to plan heists for fun, Lenny.”

Mick snaps a photo of me before leaving on his bike. Lisa laughs and follows. Len leans on his bike and smirks until I start vibrating out of the ice. He leaves with a fond smile that few could recognise.

I try to give chase, but Rathaway must’ve done something to prevent their bikes from being tracked. Caitlin calls me back. I’m half-tempted to go home. Len won’t be back for a while though. I run back to Star Labs.

“Suit off. I need to check it over for damage,” Cisco says the second I walk in.

I change and pass it to him. Cisco doesn’t start immediately looking it over. He’s staring at my hand. Why… Oh. Oh no.

“So,” I say really loudly. “Any idea how Len managed to make one of his grenades look like a diamond?”

Cisco narrows his eyes. “Are you seriously trying to change the topic right now?”

“I just got back. What topic could I possibly-?”

“You’re wearing a wedding ring,” Caitlin says.

“Now Caitlin’s changing the topic. Are neither of you concerned about how good Len’s getting at developing chryo-tech?”

I’m not, but they normally would be, and I’d really like to win that bet with Iris.

“Barry Allen,” Caitlin scolds, “When did you get married?”

“Yesterday.”

Cisco drops the Flash suit.

I clear my throat. “Right, so chyro-tech.”

Cisco stands up.

I step back a little. “Sorry I didn’t tell you?”

“Who is it?” He asks, his voice cutting through the room.

“Anyone else having a sudden craving for Coast City pizza?”

Cisco looks like he’d rather punch something. I’m starting to wish Len hadn’t intimidated the rest of the city’s criminals into staying on the downlow after a Rogue heist.

“Barry, why didn’t you tell us you were seeing someone?” Caitlin asks.

I avoid her disapproving stare. “Is it so bad to want to keep him to myself?”

“You got married,” Caitlin says. “You had a wedding and didn’t invite your best friends.”

“I didn’t.”

“The ring says otherwise,” Cisco mutters.

“I did get married, but there was no wedding. I… I didn’t want one.”

“Why not?” Caitlin asks.

I shrug. “Little hard to have a wedding when only two other people know about the relationship. I mean, five know now. Joe and Julian know about the whole married thing like you two, but only M… Singh found out this morning ‘cause I had to update my emergency contact. Iris figured it out at lunch and told Eddie. I wanted to tell everyone, but… I have lots of reasons, I do. I’ve just said them all over and over again today, and I get that you’re upset. You have the right to be. I just really don’t want to go through this again today.”

Caitlin sits back down. “Alright. Promise you’ll bring him by tomorrow night.”

“Iris kind of demanded we have dinner with her and Eddie tomorrow.”

“Wednesday then. No excuses.”

I relax. “Okay.”

“No.” Cisco shakes his head. “No, we can’t just drop this like nothing happened. He got married! He got married and didn’t tell us. He would’ve kept acting like he hadn’t if we hadn’t noticed that ring. He doesn’t deserve the reprieve.”

“Cisco-,” I start.

He shakes his head again, hurt so clear in his eyes. “Why didn’t you tell us? We’re your best friends, Barry. We tell each other everything. You know when I so much as have a crush on someone I see at a bar. But you, you didn’t tell us when you started dating someone, you didn’t mention when you fell in love, and you certainly didn’t mention when you were thinking about marriage. You’re meant to tell your friends these things. So why didn’t you? Why have you still not even given us a name?”

“I wanted to tell you. If you knew who, you’d understand, but…”

“But what?” he yells. “But we’re not good enough to know? Is that it? But you don’t trust any of us after Thawne and Jay?”

“No! I swear that’s not it.”

“Then why, Barry? Why?”

I swallow back a lump in my throat and look to Caitlin. She shakes her head, that same pain in her eyes too.

“I do trust you two.”

“Then tell us,” Cisco says.

I don’t want you to hate me.

I shake my head. “I can’t. I swear I’ll bring him Wednesday. But I just can’t right now, not after constantly going through this today.”

Cisco clenches his fists. “Fine.”

“Really?”

“I’ll just vibe your ring to find out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been writing bits and pieces from all of the chapters at once, instead of chronologically, so some chapters may end up being completed a bit slower than others. Oh, and to help (or not) with that slight cliffhanger. The next chapter is called...
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Flash vs Vibe


	5. Flash vs Vibe

I yank my hand away from Cisco before he can so much as blink.

“Cisco!” Caitlin yells.

He ignores her and reaches for me again. I speed to the other side of the cortex.

“I already promised to bring him in two days. Why can’t that be enough for you?”

Cisco scowls. “Put yourself in our shoes, Barry. Would you really wait two days to find out who exactly managed to hoodwink one of the most morally sound people you’ve ever met?”

“What? Nobody’s hoodwinked me. You’ll understand why I kept him secret on Wednesday. I swear I’ll make it up to you for having to wait, and for not telling you guys about-.”

“Or you could just tell us now and stop dancing around the issue.”

I hesitate. Cisco doesn’t give me a chance to answer. He opens a breach under my feet and drops me from the ceiling. I land in a run, heading straight for the exit. And another breach. Which leads me running straight into a wall. I slam into it and flop to the ground with a groan. Cisco strides across the room while I scramble to my feet. He catches my left hand and immediately goes still.

Caitlin’s indignation isn’t quite gone, but she does lean forward from her spot a little, obviously curious. Cisco snaps out of it and backs away from me the same way he did after vibing Jay’s helmet. I slump against the wall and look at Cisco with pleading eyes. He scoffs.

“What’d you see?” Caitlin asks.

Cisco glares at me. “The cupboard where the rings were stored before yesterday.”

I slump a little lower. So much for showing Len in an appealing light.

“Want to tell her what else was in that cupboard, Barry, or should I?” Cisco asks.

“My Flash suit,” I try.

“And?”

“Some outerwear.”

Cisco breathes deeply. “Some outerwear. That’s what you’re going with?”

“I didn’t realise it was against some unspoken rule to have a parka in a cupboard, Cisco. They’re comfy.”

“Except it’s not yours, is it?”

“Well, no. But my husband lets me wear it all the time, so-.”

“You wear _that_ parka all the time?” Cisco’s voice goes really high.

I shrug. “It’s just a nice jacket.”

Caitlin holds up her hands. “Does this parka happen to be blue?”

“Maybe,” I mumble.

“And was there also a certain gun in this cupboard, Cisco?”

“If by certain, you mean made by me, then definitely.”

Caitlin marches across the room, heels clacking sharply, and punches me in the arm hard.

“Ow!”

She hits me again. “I can’t believe you married Captain Cold!” And again. “He tried to blow me up!” And again. “He tortured Cisco’s brother!” And again. “When I said don’t trust him, I didn’t mean fall in love with the man!”

I jump away from her before she can hit me again. “It wasn’t exactly on purpose.”

“You didn’t marry a villain on purpose?” Cisco questions.

“Well, I did do that. I mean, I proposed and everything, but it’s not like I expected to have feelings for Len in the first place. I’m glad I did, ‘cause he’s the best-.”

“No, Barry. Leonard Snart is not the best,” Cisco says. “Leonard Snart just shot at you. Remember that?”

“I mean, Leonard Snart didn’t do that.”

Caitlin sighs. “He’s still Captain Cold, Barry, just like you’re still the Flash.”

“I know that. I’m not separating them or anything. I just meant that he took my last name. He’s Leonard Allen now.”

Cisco physically twitches. “This has to be some sort of prank.” He drops into his chair. “Yes, you’ve somehow managed to trick my powers and have a totally normal husband. Or better yet, you’re not married at all, because that’s the kind of thing you mention to your best friends.”

“I almost told you yesterday before we went to the Court House. You seemed a bit too weirded out by Len, Mick and Lisa though, so I didn’t say anything.”

Cisco slams his head against the table. “I did not see you the day of and not notice. I did not see you the day of and not notice. I did not-.”

“What’s he talking about?” Caitlin asks.

Cisco looks like she just trashed his lab. “I ran into those four at lunch yesterday. I saw them right before they…” He starts typing. “You know what? I’m going to check the CCTV outside the Court House from yesterday. Maybe it’ll prove that Barry’s just messing with us.”

Caitlin sighs. “I don’t think he’s-.”

“Nope. I am not accepting it without certain proof.”

“I already admitted-.”

“Certain proof, Barry.”

“I have pictures.”

“Why would you take pictures of something you want to keep secret?” Caitlin asks.

“So we can all look back at them years from now and laugh about the whole thing.”

She doesn’t smile. “You really think we’ll ever laugh at this?”

“Well, yeah. You guys won’t be mad at me forever, right?”

“I don’t know, Barry.” She watches me droop and tries for a weak smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “I can’t speak for everyone else, but I’m going to need a lot of time and a lot of evidence that he’s good for you. I don’t… I can’t trust your judgement when it comes to Cold. You’ve never really been able to think objectively when it comes to him. It’s a wonder none of us figured out your feelings for him sooner.”

Cisco clears his throat. “Found the footage.” He doesn’t sound impressed.

“Believe me now?” I ask.

He hits play. Mick and Lisa walk down the stairs ahead of us. Len’s laughing and trips. I spin around and catch him without using my powers. We kiss. I find myself smiling as I watch us talk. Cisco stops the footage when I rest my head on Len’s shoulder, both of us grinning.

“You really married him,” he says quietly.

“Yes.”

“And you almost invited me?”

“You would’ve been a better best man than Mick.”

“What if I tried to stop you?”

I shrug. “I would’ve expected as much.”

“Is that why you didn’t tell us?”

“I wanted to.”

Caitlin’s expression softens. “Did he tell you not to?”

I flinch back. “No. Len wouldn’t do that. I know you only see him as a villain, but he’s more than that. He’s a good person, whether he sees it or not. I love him. I freaking married him. This isn’t something he tricked me into or anything like that. He never told me to keep us a secret. I chose to not say anything because I couldn’t bear the thought of being trusted enough to be a superhero, but not being trusted enough to know the love of my life better than you do.”

“You should’ve just told us, Barry,” Cisco says.

“You would’ve gotten angry,” I mumble.

“Yeah, we have the right to be a little mad that you’re with a villain, but we could’ve gotten over it within weeks, a month tops. But keeping it a secret for…” Cisco runs a hand down his face. “How long?”

“Christmas last year.”

“Eleven months. You kept it a secret for eleven months, Barry. You didn’t trust us for eleven months.” Cisco bursts from his chair and storms up to me. “You should’ve told us.”

He opens a breach and walks out.

I hang my head. “You’re not going to say that we rushed or that we got married too soon or anything?” I ask quietly.

“No. You and Cold… You and _Len_ have been growing closer for a while, and there was always that something between you. I just really hope he’s worth it to you. I hope he’s worth all of this. I don’t think you’re going to lose anyone for being with him, but it’s going to take a while for any of us to get over not being worth your trust.”

“I do trust you all. It’s not-.”

“You may trust us with your life, Barry, but you don’t trust us to respect your choices. Maybe that’s our fault too. Guess that’s why it hurts. Imagine how you’d feel if someone you care about doesn’t feel safe to tell you something so important because of how you’ve reacted in the past. It’s … easier to blame that person for not saying anything than taking some of the blame yourself for not being open to other possibilities, like a supervillain being a half decent husband for your best friend.”

I study my ring. “Do you think I should bring him around Wednesday, or…”

“Like I said before, we’re all going to need some time to get used to this.” Caitlin tidies up her space. “Some of us more than others. It’s probably best to keep Co- Len clear of Star Labs for now.”

“I didn’t know about the diamond heist,” I feel the need to say. “I don’t know about any of them in advance. It’s part of our rules.”

Caitlin smiles. “I know, Barry. Cisco does too. Marrying a supervillain doesn’t cancel out your superhero. If anyone thinks that, they’re welcome to look through the amount of times you’ve been bedridden thanks to saving this city. I have a list, alternatively named, Barry Allen needs to be more careful.”

I laugh. “Len would love to look at that.”

Caitlin tenses, and slowly breathes out. “I’ll show it to him the next time he helps with a meta.”

“Thank you. For that and … well, not hating me.”

“Nobody’s going to hate you for this, Barry,” Caitlin says. I must falter, because Caitlin looks me in the eye. “Nobody.”

After the day I’ve had, I’m not so sure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While Barry’s had some experience with fighting against Cisco’s Earth-2 counterpart, he hasn’t fought against Cisco himself before, who’s been watching how Barry reacts using his powers for years. Barry was more set on getting out of there rather than fighting back, and he did face the Rogues earlier that night, so he’s a bit tired (plus some emotional exhaustion from the amount of arguing with lots of loved ones in one day). Anyway, that’s my justification for why Barry technically lost, and quite quickly, that isn’t based purely on the plot needing him to.


	6. Letter of Association

Len’s mid-yawn when I snap a photo of him and set it as my phone background.

“Barry, what are you doing?”

“Nothing.”

“The lying, Scarlet.”

“Just fulfilling a bet with Iris. She’ll want to check tonight.”

“Tonight?”

“We’re having dinner at hers. I meant to tell you last night, but well…”

“The heist distracted you?”

“Yeah.”

Len slips a shirt on. “Cold gun stays at home?”

“Probably best. I won’t let them physically threaten you. Promise.”

“As long as I get to keep it when Queen figures it out.”

“You won’t need it. I’ll have you in Chile before he gets to Central.”

Len smirks. “Doesn’t that break several border laws, Flash?”

“Murdering my husband breaks some laws too.”

“As much as I appreciate the sentiment, I am rather attached to life here. No vigilante with a bow and arrow is going to make me live a life on the run. I’m saving that for an ultimate heist or criminalisation of metas situation.”

“They won’t criminalise-.”

Len kisses me. “Course not. As mayor of Central City, I won’t allow it to happen.”

“Wrong Earth, Len.”

“That Earth is more advanced than ours. Only right that they’re ahead in politics too. I’ve already got crime virtually non-existent for an hour every day. What past mayors can claim that?”

I shake my head. “Starting to regret telling you about Earth-2.”

“Only that?”

“Only that. Getting yelled at all day was to be expected. Maybe after Joe and Cisco have some time to calm down, things can go back to normal.”

Len tugs me toward the kitchen. “If it does get to a point where they take things too far, just say the word, and I’ll have a nice chat with them.”

“ _Len_.”

“Won’t even bring the cold gun.”

“Or Mick.”

He sighs. “Fine. Or Mick.”

“Or Lisa.”

“You know she could whip Cisco into order without lifting a finger.”

“Promise me.”

Len reluctantly looks me in the eye. “Fine, but if they threaten your safety, all bets are off.”

I scoff. “They’re not going to-.”

“Cisco fought you, Scarlet. He was angry enough to fight you, and that was before he knew it was me you were arguing about. I don’t trust him to look after you anymore. I’m not even going to go on heists personally until he calms the hell down, so I don’t accidently incite another incident like that again. The Rogues can deal with me focusing on tech development and planning in the meantime.”

“How am I meant to explain that not only are we great together, but you’re the one who’s too good for me?”

Len shakes his head. “The lying, Barry.”

I grin and steal a kiss. “But I’m telling the truth.”

“The years of concussions must be affecting your judgement.”

“We both know I heal too fast for that.”

“You always were about proving the impossible possible.”

“Exactly.” I hold Len’s hands. “Meaning, I’ll prove that you’re far too good for this annoying speedster. Everyone should be questioning why you put up with me. It’s just weird that they’re going about this the complete wrong way.”

Len smiles. “To a normal person, you’d sound sarcastic. But I’m ninety percent sure that you’re actually being serious, in a sickenly sweet kind of way.”

“I love you too.”

“Great, maybe now you can stop delaying, so you don’t have to go to work and face the horrors of law enforcement. Meanwhile, I’ll enjoy spending my day doing precisely the opposite.”

“We could take a surprise trip to visit my friend Kara on Earth-38.”

Len considers it for a moment. “But you promised Iris to dinner tonight. Maybe save the get-off-this-Earth free card for the weekend.”

“Fine, but you get to explain to the woman who can bench a plane why we didn’t visit sooner.”

“Wait, she can bench what?”

I laugh, speed through my morning routine, kiss Len goodbye, and head to work.

*

The elevator doors at the CCPD open, but nobody walks out. I speed home, switch the parka I accidentally grabbed for my actual jacket, then run back to work with an awkward smile. I’m pretty sure Len noticed the parka randomly appearing.

 _‘Quit leaving it lying around,’_ I text.

_‘You wore it last.’_

Only out of spite for Cisco’s reaction last night. Also, because that thing is way too comfortable. It’s unfair that Len’s costume is infinitely comfier than the Flash suit. Maybe I can use that as some sort of olive branch for Cisco. Surely, he could design something aerodynamic and less clingy.

“Allen! Thought you weren’t going to be late anymore.”

I scratch the back of my head. “Sorry, Captain. Grabbed the wrong jacket and had to go back home.”

Horror spreads across Singh’s face. “You don’t mean you almost walked in wearing…”

“Yep.”

He sighs. “I suppose I can make an exception given the circumstances.”    

“Thanks, sir.”

“Just make sure it doesn’t happen again, Allen.”

No promises. That’d be an interesting way to tell the entire precinct. I’d much prefer them all slowly figuring it out. That way there’s less chance of them ganging up on me.

Julian scowls when I walk into our lab. “I hoped Detectives West and Thawne were exaggerating yesterday.”

“It’s not like I try to run late. Most the time I leave early.”

“So what’s your excuse this time? Traffic? Puppy you couldn’t resist petting? Hiding your route so nobody figures out where you live?”

I dump my stuff and flick through today’s work. “Forgot my jacket.”

“Because that’s a good enough excuse.”

“It’s the truth. If you don’t want to believe it, that’s your problem.”

“Oh, I believe someone as scatterbrained as you would forget a belonging. I just don’t think that warrants being late to work.”

“Are you going to pick on everything that makes me a terrible CSI in your books, or are you going to let me get my work done?”

“Detectives West and Thawne will be up in a few minutes to discuss a case. If you’re so incapable of working without slight distractions, feel free to leave.”

“There’s a difference between slight distraction and being insulted.”

Julian shrugs. “I apologise. Not everyone keeps themselves to the same standard I do.”

Just ignore him. He is not worth it. Captain Singh wants us to get along.

“Hey, Barr.” Eddie walks in with a coffee. He nods to Julian. “West will be up in a moment.”

“Iris won the bet,” I say, pulling up the most urgent case and running the prints.

“How’d they take it?”

“Caitlin punched my arm a few times. Cisco… As well as expected.”

“Iris was pretty mad as we went over the signs we missed.”

“And you?”

Eddie smiles. “Sticking by what I said.”

I … hadn’t expected that.

“Thanks. You definitely came close to figuring it out several times.”

“Oh, I know. Iris was kicking herself over it.”

“If you’re done discussing Allen’s love life,” Julian says, as Joe walks in.

“So everyone knows except me now?” he asks.

I focus on cross-referencing the prints with cleared alibis. “Pretty much anyone who knows figured it out. If you want to talk about it though, I’m sure you can wait until after work.”

That gets the first genuine smile from Julian that I’ve ever seen. “So the case,” he says loudly, drawing Eddie away from my desk.

I tune their discussion out for all of five minutes until Julian says something particularly loudly. “Looks to me like the Flash let Cold and his Rogues get away. That or he’s even more incompetent than I first thought.”

I grab my bag to leave.

Julian whirls on me. “And where do you think you’re going, Allen?”

I sigh. “I can’t be in here while you openly discuss this case. I’ll keep working downstairs until Detectives West and Thawne are finished here.”

Eddie grimaces. “Letter of Association?”

“Yep.”

Julian narrows his eyes. “Internal Affairs.”

“What’s that got to do with this?” Joe asks. “And why’ve you got to leave on a Snart related case, Barry?”

He’s not Snart anymore. I bite my tongue. “I’m not allowed to work on any cases related to the Rogues, haven’t been since last Christmas.”

“Right, because you’re friends with a criminal.”

Julian’s eyes widen. “No, because he’s married to one.”

I flinch.

Julian just has to notice that too. “That’s why you were worried about Internal Affairs yesterday. It certainly explains why you’d keep the relationship a secret from your family and friends. It’s no surprise from the man who spent years visiting his father in prison.”

“My father was innocent!”

“Perhaps, but your husband isn’t.”

“This is nonsense,” Joe says. “You can’t just go around accusing people of marrying monsters.”

“ _Don’t_ call him that.”

Joe steps towards me. “Why, Barr? Because you lost all sense and decided to befriend the man?”

I clench my jaw. “Because Julian’s right.”

Joe scoffs. “You’re seriously telling me that your secret husband is Leonard Snart?”

“His name is Leonard Allen. I already told you that he took my name.”

“Yeah, right around the time you told me that I didn’t know him.”

“Well, it’s not like much has changed since the first time I told you that. You still refuse to see beyond his past. And you’re still one of the biggest reasons we had to keep our relationship a secret in the first place.”

“Because you were afraid I’d disapprove?”

“Because I was afraid you’d try to make me choose.”

And I can’t do that. I just can’t.

Eddie steps forward. “Maybe this can wait until we’re somewhere more private.”

Joe turns on him. “You knew?”

“Iris figured it out yesterday. I’ve suspected Barry was with someone for months and told everyone as much.”

I walk past them all. “If you want someone to blame, blame me. Not Eddie, or Iris, or even Len. It was my choice not to tell you, not theirs.”

“This discussion isn’t over, Barry.”

A discussion requires a minimum of two parties listening to what the other is saying. This discussion hasn’t even started yet.

*

Joe doesn’t so much as glance at me when I walk past him and Eddie, back into my lab. Julian has the audacity to look smug before I set my glare on him, and he turns back to his work. I pointedly text Len in front of him.

_‘Joe knows. My ass of a labmate figured it out and just had to blurt it out with Joe standing right there. He’s already started ignoring me.’_

_‘Something from the heist tipped him off, didn’t it?’_

_‘My Letter of Association did._ ‘

_‘I can come by during lunch, so West’s not tempted to interrogate you then.’_

_‘Probably not best the day after a heist.’_

_‘If you need me…’_

_‘I know. Thanks, Len.’_

_‘Love you, Scarlet.’_

_‘Love you, too.’_

Julian eyes my phone like it’s a gun. “You really shouldn’t be texting during work.”

“You really shouldn’t be butting into my personal business, but here we are.”

“If you want to say something to me, just say it, Allen.”

I whip around a little faster than should be possible. “If _I_ have something to say? You, the one who’s been criticising every single thing I do, are acting like I’m the one with some unsaid problem?”

“I’ve never kept my issues with you a secret, Allen. You’re a terrible excuse for a professional and have been dragging your personal business into our shared workspace for the past 30 hours.”

“What the hell gives you the right?” I yell. “What could I have possibly done to you in the barely two days that we’ve known each other that justifies you barging into a situation, you have no damn business in, and ruining what little hold I have on it?”

“Your family deserved to know.”

“You think I don’t know that? You think I didn’t spend the past year torn at having to hide something so important? You think I didn’t almost tell them thousands of times already?” I clench my fists. “You don’t know me, Julian. You don’t even know me, and you still act like you have some right to judge one of the hardest choices in my life.”

Julian breaks eye contact. “I didn’t mean to. I figured it out and immediately spoke. I didn’t think about it first. I am sorry for that, Allen.” He looks back up. “But I’m not sorry that Detective West found out. You should’ve told him yourself. I can’t stand it when people don’t value family until after they lose it.”

“Both of my parents were murdered, my father in front of me only months ago. Don’t think for a moment that I don’t treasure the family I still have. That includes Len, whether the rest of family accepts him or not.”

“Why’d you marry him?” Julian asks quietly.

“Because I love him and want to spend the rest of my life with him. Why else would I marry someone?”

“But he’s a criminal.”

“I’m late to every single date.”

“Wh-.”

“The only times I clean the apartment are when I want something from him.”

“I don-.”

“The only reason we’re even together is because I wore him down after he literally jumped out of a window when I first kissed him.”

“Who jumps-.”

“Second storey too. The guy was that scared of confronting the thing that’d been building between us for over a year, because he thinks he’s the one that doesn’t deserve me, even though I’m pretty sure it’s the other way around.”

“Why are you tell-.”

“Len’s been to prison, sure, but everyone’s got their flaws. I am sick and tired of people acting like his are irredeemable.”

“Why didn’t you tell Detective West this?”

I sigh and drop into my chair. “Because he wouldn’t listen. I don’t know if he ever will.”

“Well, you certainly can’t know that for sure until you talk it out with him, preferably far away from the CCPD.”

“It’s not like I try to have confrontations here.”

“Last a day without doing exactly that and I might believe you.”

I smile. “Usually I last a week.”

Julian looks like he’s tempted to scream. “Is it too late to transfer to another precinct?”

“Don’t think anywhere else needs a meta-specialist.”

“This wasn’t in the job description.”

“Neither was being struck by lightning.”

“It’s a miracle you’re not a meta considering all the others made that night when they should’ve died.”

I focus on my work and hide my grin.

“You’re not a meta, right, Allen?”

I stay silent.

“Allen?”

I look back at Julian and laugh at him.

“… Barry?”

“Course not. I was in a coma for months, Julian. Wouldn’t having powers have woken me up a little earlier?”

Julian nods. “Of course.”

A little doubt and he won’t think to put it all together. I should’ve misdirected better when it came to Len and me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tried to balance the fluff with the not-so-fluff in this chapter. I want to say that Joe will calm down and take this all just fine, but, well... The dinner with Iris/Eddie is up next.


	7. Light Interrogation

I hand off the results of several cases at the end of the day, passing the last one to Eddie. Joe refuses to look my way, even when I stumble and drop the folder. Eddie eyes my trembling hand before I can hide it behind my back.

“Barr-.”

“See you tonight,” I say, and quickly walk away, scrubbing at the itch in my eye.

I’m fine. It’s fine. Joe doesn’t hate me. He’s just angry. It’s going to be fine. It’ll be-.

“Scarlet?”

Len strides out of the elevator in a tight-fitting sweater and jeans, expression concerned. I smile weakly.

“Didn’t know you were coming.”

Len scans my body for injuries, a habit he picked up, and definitely notices my shaking. He folds me into a crushing hug and hooks his chin over my shoulder. “I look after what’s mine, Scarlet. You should know that.”

“Really shouldn’t call me that here.”

“They’re too busy glaring at me to care about what I’m saying.”

“And J-oe?”

Len hugs me tighter. “Just looked away first in our glare-off.”

I bury my face in Len’s shoulder. “Think people will notice the rings?”

“I’m wearing gloves. To them, I’m just an overprotective friend comforting you.”

“I really want to kiss you right now.”

“Your choice.”

I slump against Len. “Don’t want to push Joe. He already hates me.”

Len goes rigid. “He what?”

“Well, it’s obvious, isn’t it?”

Len breathes deeply. “Barry, has anybody else said or even come close to telling you that West hates you?”

“No, but-.”

“Then he doesn’t. West isn’t like my father. He definitely hates me, no question there. But he doesn’t, he _couldn’t_ hate you. He’s just handling his anger differently from Cisco. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Now, go back up to your lab and get your things. I need to have a chat with Singh about West being an unprofessional jackass and making you uncomfortable in the workplace because of personal issues.”

“You don’t have-.”

“No, I really do, Scarlet.”

I speed kiss his cheek. “Thanks, Len.”

I wince at the slight damp patch in Len’s sweater. He shakes his head slightly, runs a hand through my hair, and smirks.

“Captain, just the man I was looking for.”

And Singh is behind me, pointedly glaring at all the officers distracted by Len’s presence.

“Allen, hurry up, so this nuisance can leave my precinct already.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Now, now, David. I’m not going anywhere until we talk about a certain detective’s recent behaviour.”

“You get five minutes in my office.”

Len’s smirk turns into a full-blown grin as he follows Singh. I make eye-contact with Joe, who scowls and looks away. Eddie grimaces next to him.

I dart upstairs before anyone else can glare at me. Julian’s packing up as I walk in.

“Took long enough.”

“Len decided to pick me up.”

Julian drops his bag. “He what?”

“He’s talking to Singh right now.”

“That man is the prime suspect for an active case!”

“Don’t worry. He doesn’t know what you look like, or that you’re the case’s lead CSI.”

Julian scoffs. “Like you haven’t told him I’m assigned to the Rogues.”

“Len doesn’t get information about what I do, and I don’t get information about what he does. Even when he half-heartedly tries, I change the topic before he can even blink. I’m better at manipulating a conversation than he is.”

“Leonard Snart is a known master-planner.”

“Yep.” I grab my bag. “That particular time, I asked him to marry me, instead of clarifying which Rogues you’d be charged with. He took a while to realise what I did.”

“You what?”

I smile. “Actually, first time I kissed him was like that too. I got caught up deflecting the conversation from my slight lack of sleep, and well…”

“And that ended in him jumping from your window.” Julian sighs. “I’ve no clue why you kept your relationship a secret. The two of you are clearly perfect for each other, in a both being ludicrous examples of human beings sense.”

“Aw, thanks, Julian. That’s the nicest thing you’ve said to me.” I stride past a speechless Julian with a cheeky grin.

That immediately drops when I open the door.

“Joe, you-.”

“I’m here to see Albert.”

I step aside. “Right.”

Joe goes to walk past me, then stops. “Did you hear why he thought the Flash let Cold go?”

“No. I made to leave as soon as I realised you were talking about that case.”

The ‘like I’m meant to’ goes unsaid.

“Julian Albert, a CSI almost as good as you, Barry, seems to think that the Flash stood still long enough to be hit by some sort of cold grenade. See, that didn’t really make sense to me or Eddie, because we know the Flash wouldn’t slow down in a serious fight. He knows better than that.”

“You really think I just let them get away?”

“Well, you married one of them, didn’t you? What exactly am I meant to think?”

I clench my fists. “I _think_ that Cold tricked the Flash with a decoy diamond. I _think_ that nobody except the Flash was hurt. I _think_ that Cold adjusted that particular grenade to cause minimal pain and zero permanent damage. But sure, believe that the Flash is somehow aiding crime instead of trying to stop it, just like Julian and every other Flash hater.”

Joe’s expression softens. “I don’t hate you.”

“Could’ve fooled me with all the yelling and silent treatments lately.”

“Look, Barr, if you’d just listen for a moment-.”

“If _I’d_ just listen?” I bite back the instinct to scream. “I love him, Joe. I love Len, and if you can’t… When _you_ are ready to listen, I’d be more than happy to talk. Lectures aren’t really my think. Thought you would’ve figured that out by now.”

“That man is a criminal!”

“That brilliant, kind man is my husband. And I will not choose between him and you. So, please, play the concerned parent as much as you want, but accept the fact that you have no choice in who I love.”

“You need help, Barry, if you think that mons-.”

Everything slows down. I take a deep breath, wipe away the tears starting to gather, and breathe out. Everything speeds up.

“-ter is somehow kind.”

“Like I said, when you’re ready to listen, I’d be more than happy to talk. Until then, I’m going to need some serious space before we both say something we regret.” I unclench my fists, ignoring the way Joe looks at them in surprise. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Detective West.”

Eddie is waiting at the top of the stairs. He reaches for my shoulder. I shrug him off.

“Barr?”

“I’m fine.”

“Want me to talk to him?”

“Not worth it. If things get tense between you two, it could cost your lives out there.”

“He’ll come around.”

I’m less sure of that every day.

“I know,” I say instead.

“If you want to postpone dinner…”

“I’ll be fine.”

“It’s okay if you’re not.”

I falter on the last step. “But the longer I delay these things, the worse it’ll get, right?”

“That doesn’t mean-.”

“I’m fine, Eddie. I’ve dealt with worse.”

Eddie stops me from heading to Singh’s office. “Iris knows how Joe gets with these things. She of all people would understand.”

“She shouldn’t have to. Joe, Cisco, Caitlin, hell, even Julian, were all right. I should have just told you all when this started. I should have dealt with it then. I should have at least told everyone after Zoom was … after Zoom was dealt with.”

“Barry, your dad had just-.”

“Something has always just happened to me! That’s how my life is. I don’t get a break. Not really. The second I think, yes, things are finally the best they’ve ever been, someone new comes along to screw it all up, or I go ahead and do it myself. What happens when I end up messing this up for Len too? I can’t do that to him. I can’t lose anyone else. I just can’t.”

Eddie lets go of me. I stride over to the Captain’s office and knock on the door. Len opens it with an exasperated sigh, pulls me inside, and closes the door.

“Tell me West didn’t rile you up again.”

I look to Singh, but he looks equally annoyed. “It shouldn’t be a problem anymore. I really am trying to keep the yelling within the precinct to a minimum. I swear.”

“Take a seat, Allens.”

Len smiles. “Finally, someone stops calling me Snart.”

I sit down, going to smile too, but it doesn’t feel right, so I drop it. Len watches me, practically oozing concern.

“I’m fine,” I mumble.

“Sure thing, Scarlet.”

“I have no clue how more people don’t know you’re the Flash,” Singh says, as if he’s talking about the damn weather.

I tense. “What?”

Len sighs. “Alright, that one was on me.”

“What? Nothing was on you. There’s nothing to take the blame for. I mean, to imply to… Uh, I’m definitely not a meta?”

“Try not making it sound like a question next time, Scarlet.”

I sink into my chair. “I swear, I’m normally so much better at this.”

“You’re really not, Allen, but everyone’s too oblivious to see it,” Singh says. “I’ve known from pretty much the start. West is terrible at excuses. There was no real need to mention it before.”

“But you kept questioning how I met Len!”

“You have to get used to people asking those sorts of questions if you want to keep that mask.” Singh smiles. “Plus, it’s amusing to see you and anyone who knows scramble for excuses.”

“Is that why you’re lenient when I’m late?”

Singh looks offended. “I’m lenient because you’re a damn good CSI, speeding around the city in red or not. I’d rather my favourite hero not be married to his nemesis, but really, what else am I meant to expect from Barry Walking Disaster Allen?”

Len whoops, actually whoops and leaps out of his chair. “Ha! Told you I was your nemesis.”

“Still goes to Reverse Flash. You’re an anti-hero at best these days. All your Rogues are.”

“I’m going to do a poll. You just wait, Scarlet. I’ll prove Central City thinks I’m the Flash’s nemesis. They’ve barely even heard of old Eobard.”

“Who?” Singh asks.

Len grins. “Exactly.”

I roll my eyes. “Time-travelling speedster from the future who killed my mother, the real Harrison Wells, built and exploded the particle accelerator, gave me my powers, and tried to use them to get back to his time. I tossed him to a future where hopefully a more experienced me knows how to beat him.”

Typical Barry Allen response. Deal with the problem by making future Barry handle it. I mean, it can only fail me so many times before it finally works. Plus, now I’ve got Len and his growing arsenal of cryogenic weaponry.

Singh pushes his chair away from his desk and stands. “Well, if you could refrain from sending my precinct into a frenzy for at least another week, I’ll keep West from interrupting Allen’s work with confrontations. If he goes against my order, I’ll have to give him an official warning. So, please, don’t aggravate the man on purpose if you can help it.”

Len holds his hand over his heart. “I’ll be an angel.”

“Nobody believes that for a second, Mr Allen.”

Len beams at the name. “Nice chat, David.”

I sigh. “You refuse to call anyone else Captain, don’t you?”

Len shrugs. “Blame Cisco. He’s the one who gave me the name.”

I shoot Singh a silent apology and drag Len out of the Captain’s office. Eddie’s waiting outside it, on his phone. He glances up, and nods.

“Never fails to calm Barry down,” Eddie says, while typing on his phone.

“Are you making a list?” I ask.

“Iris wanted proof.”

Len checks nobody’s watching and kisses my cheek. “Then let’s go give her some more.”

*

We get to Iris and Eddie’s apartment before Iris does. Eddie gestures to the barstools while he gets started on making dinner. Len offers to help five times before the detective gives in, only because Len’s the best at knowing how much food I need. I check my phone for meta alerts every two minutes, earning an exasperated scowl from Len every time.

“Nobody’s going to do anything for at least another forty minutes, Barry.”

Eddie looks confused at that. “What makes you say that?”

Len mumbles the answer under his breath and blushes. Eddie stares at the thief like he didn’t know Len was capable of embarrassment. I grin.

“Someone was concerned that I wasn’t getting the chance to eat before patrols and decided that meant he simply had to regulate crime in Central City so that I had an hour after work.”

Eddie puts the knife he was using to chop vegetables down. “And he actually managed it?”

Len crosses his arms. “I promised Scarlet I would and I did. It took almost half a year, and some idiots tried to break the rule after I got pardoned, but some anonymous tips landed them behind bars within a week. Like I said, nobody’s going to break Silent Hour.”  
I put my phone down, earning a smirk from Len.

“But what excuse did you use back when you came up with it?” I ask. “Because you were still sending those problem-a-day texts back then, and acted like I’d wake up one day and finally see that I was out of my mind for even being attracted to you.”

“Well, we both know that’s true.”

I roll my eyes. “See what I deal with?” I ask Eddie, who looks mostly amused. “This delusional man before you tried to justify caring about me, and doing absurd things like regulating crime just so I can eat properly, as making sure the Flash is an adequate challenge during his heists.”

“Our first ever deal was based off you being a challenge.”

I look Len dead in the eye. “The only reason you listened to me that night was because you thought I was cute.”

“It took me off-guard!”

Iris clears her throat from the front door. “Tell me you’ve been recording them,” she says to Eddie.

“I’ve been making a list.”

“Show me in a moment. First things first…”

Iris marches around the counter, yanks me to my feet, and strongarms me into a hug.

“I heard about Dad’s reaction.”

I slowly hug her back. “At least he didn’t fight me to find out.”

Iris pulls back. “There’s a story there.”

Len scowls. “Cisco Ramon is on very thin ice after he hurt Barry.”

“He didn’t-.”

Iris covers my mouth and turns to Len. “What happened?”

He tells her, ignoring my muffled inputs. Iris looks like she’s stopping herself from marching down to Star Labs this second, and Eddie seems to look at me with more and more concern. I brush off Iris’s hand.

“Cisco uses his powers for Flash business all the time. I don’t see why it’s such a big deal. I shouldn’t have kept it a secret. Literally everyone agrees on that. So what if he used his powers to find out two days before I was ready to tell him?”

“Are you really blaming yourself right now, Barry?” Len asks softly, like he’s been winded.

“Well, it is my fault that everyone’s been so angry. I knew they’d react like this.”

“No, Scarlet.” Len nods to Iris and switches spots with her, taking my left hand in his. “We both knew they wouldn’t approve of me. Okay? We knew that from the start. But the way West and Cisco handled this before they even knew it was about me, that was _not_ something either of us could have expected. Do you understand me, Barry? Forcing you to reveal information that you have a damn good reason for keeping secret, even if only until you’re emotionally ready to share it, is not alright. Making you feel like this, especially while being fully aware of your hero-guilt complex the size of the sun, serious abandonment issues, near-constant state of extreme stress, and justified trust issues, that was not alright.”

“But I hurt them, by not saying anything.”

Len squeezes my hand. “That doesn’t mean they’re incapable of hurting you back. Cisco fought you for fuck’s sake. He tossed you against concrete because he couldn’t wait two days for you to be ready. And West? He’s been on your case because of me for _months_. And now he’s harassing you at work instead of taking a minute to listen to an opinion different from his. They have hurt you too, Barry. It’s okay to be sad over that. I know you feel done with this mess. But trying to take all the blame for it, that’s only going to end in you being able to argue less and less the next times they disagree with one of your choices, regardless of whether it’s their business or not.”

I take a deep breath and let out a humourless laugh. “I can’t believe Cisco kicked my ass.”

Len smirks. “Guess we’re both prone to being caught off-guard.”

“Like that stupid decoy,” I mutter.

Iris perks up. “So you didn’t go easy on him last night, then?”

Her tone is joking, so, so different from Joe’s earlier today.

Len laughs. “Please, I tricked Scarlet fair and square. There was no going easy on the other.”

“I saw you pocket that diamond. Not my fault it was a fake.”

“You saw what I wanted you to see. I knew you’d be trying to prove then more than ever that you weren’t just letting me get away with whatever I do as Cold. Using a decoy was the obvious choice.”

“Doesn’t mean you had to make that photo Mick took your lock screen.”

Len shrugs. “It perfectly captures your expression of surprise, exasperation, and resignation. How could I let such a thing go to waste?”

“Speaking of photos…” Iris trails off.

I groan. “Got him mid-yawn this morning.”

“Wait, what?” Len asks, rounding the counter to help Eddie again.

The detective shakes his head. “Iris won the bet.”

“What bet?”

I laugh and unlock my phone, showing Iris the background. She looks from it, to me, to Len, and back to me again.

“Okay, I get it.”

“Right,” I say. “The parka doesn’t do him justice.”

Len finally catches on and shares an exasperated look of fondness with Eddie. Iris drags me to the couch to talk, heedless of leaving a lead detective with one of his case’s prime suspects right after pretty much admitting to stealing that diamond. She ducks behind the cushions as if that would somehow block our conversation.

“Did I ever tell you why I believed it when I noticed you two growing closer?” she asks.

“I don’t think so.”

Iris glances back at our husbands, who are steadily avoiding all work-related topics, and turns back with a small smile. “You’re lighter around him, Barr. I think we all noticed it, even if we didn’t quite put it together. The fact that Captain Cold of all people could manage that with you without even trying, it’s kind of hard to face, when it seemed like none of us could.”

“But you do help.”

“Not like he does. I don’t think anyone of us can quite read you like Leonard Snart can.” 

“Allen,” I correct automatically.

Iris laughs. “Right, Leonard Allen. That’s going to take some getting used to.”

“So you’re not angry at me anymore?”

“No, Barr. I don’t think anyone really is. They’re just mad they didn’t notice how much happier you’ve been lately, when they didn’t even realise how bad you had gotten.”

“I hadn’t-.”

“I may not have known how to help you, Barry, but I knew you were hurting. Every time I tried to help though, more kept being dumped on both our plates. I couldn’t make you a priority, and I’m sorry for that. But I’m glad he did. You save this city almost every day, Barry Allen. You deserve to have someone make you their number one priority.”

“Even if that someone’s Len?”

Iris hugs me. “Even if that someone’s Len.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Promise this fic isn't pure angst/drama. One of the upcoming chapters is pretty much pure fluff. Take a guess which character finds out in that chapter.


	8. Good Cop, Bad Cop

Len almost didn’t let me go to work. This morning he was the one dragging me back to bed to keep sleeping. When that didn’t work, he tried bribing me with food. I was half an hour late. The pancakes, waffles, bacon, eggs, sausages, and crepes may have distracted me a little. I’m not even sure when Len found the time to make all of that, but I think he might’ve had some help. At least, I’m eighty percent sure Lisa and Mick’s jackets weren’t on the couch last night. I just hope Len doesn’t rope them into any chats with certain people.

Who am I kidding? They’d volunteer.

Julian openly glares at me when I walk in late but doesn’t say anything. Apparently, the confrontations rule includes the two of us. Joe comes up an hour later, looking disgruntled but not openly hostile, which is nice. Julian glances between the two of us, as if waiting for the shouting to begin. I sigh and make to stand.

“Discussing the diamond case?” I ask.

“Yep,” Joe says. “Just me on lead now after Eddie handed in a Letter of Association this morning.”

“Oh. That’s … probably my fault, actually.” Len’s hour-long lecture, about taking responsibility for everything, after we got home last night echoes in my head. “Well, Iris’s too. She insisted on dinner.”

“Of course she did,” Joe mutters.

“Right, well, I’ll just head downstairs until you’re done here.”

I grab my stuff and jog out before things can get any more awkward. That went well. At least compared to the last two days, it did. Maybe Joe’s finally coming around. Or Singh was threatening enough when he told him to back down. Yeah, it was probably that. Joe was giving me that look when I geek out on science. Like he has absolutely zero clue what I’m saying or why I’d be interested. Though, usually, he has a little fondness in that expression. I’m not sure if that was there today.

I can’t remember the last time he looked proud of me.

Nope. Not dealing with that right now. One day without crying. Just one day since getting married without crying.

“Hey, Barry.”

I look down the stairs and freeze. Felicity is leaning against the railing, looking like she was just about to head upstairs to find me.

“Felicity. What are you doing here? Oliver’s not in town, is he? I mean, not that I don’t want Oliver to be in town right now. It’s just normally I have some sort of heads up and this time I didn’t. And right now really isn’t the best time. In fact, I kind of have work to do. Outside my lab. Because they’re discussing a Captain Cold case, and I can’t listen in. Not that I would listen in. Len knows to leave CCPD business alone. Which you most probably do not care about at all.” I take a deep breath. “So, hi, Felicity. What are you doing here?”

She laughs. “And the real reason you’re worried about Oliver being in Central?”

“Do you know? Because it seems like something someone would tell you, without my permission. And it’s really getting on my nerves that people keep doing that, not respecting that I just want to control who and who doesn’t know. I mean, you _might_ have no clue what I’m talking about, in which case, let’s just pretend that I am absolutely fine with Oliver being in town.”

Felicity beckons me down the stairs. I follow with a sigh. She walks us into an empty corridor.

“I really do have work to do, you know. And I got to work late. Not my fault at all. Len wanted-. I mean, he uh needed to chat about something really important and definitely threat to the city related.”

“Cisco’s not the only one who can hack CCTV footage, Barry.”

I tense. “You two need to learn the meaning of privacy. Like seriously, there’s tracking down bad guys and there’s stalking friends. Funnily enough, they’re not the same thing.”

“I was actually trying to help you out. I have a program set up to ping whenever the main three Rogues are spotted in public together. Most the time they’re not doing anything suspicious, but this time-.”

“Delete the program.”

“What?”

“Delete that program, Felicity.”

She backs away. “I was just trying to help, Barry.”

“I _told_ Oliver that if I ever found out he was tracking any of those three again, I would ruin him. I meant it.”

“But Oliver doesn’t know I set it up.”

“You told him I married Len though, didn’t you?”

“Well, yeah, but-.”

“Why is it so hard for you people to just let me live my life?”

“Barry, I-.”

“Cisco fought me, physically fought me, so he could vibe my ring. Joe only knows because the guy I now share my lab with doesn’t know how to stay out of my personal business and blurted it out. I haven’t had a day’s break since Sunday, and I am so, so close to grabbing Len and leaving this Earth for a week, at least, just to catch a break.”

“I’m sorry, Barry. I didn’t know.”

I take another deep breath. “Look, I get that you probably want to talk about the whole marrying Captain Cold thing, but can it please wait? I am trying to do my job here. I can’t exactly do that if everyone keeps waltzing in and wanting to have confrontations.”

Felicity reaches out and aborts the motion. “I uh actually came to ask if you wanted to have lunch to talk about … well, everything. We can maybe set up some clear ground rules for Cold and his uh…”

“Family. Lisa and Mick are his family.”

“Right. Sorry. I didn’t know. Well, the Lisa Snart part, yeah, but I didn’t figure someone like Captain Cold would-.”

“Please don’t finish that sentence.”

She nods. “Alright. So, lunch?”

“Will Oliver be there?”

“Most probably. It’s not like I could stop him from coming. I did get him to leave the bow in Star City though.”

I smile. “Thank you.”

“If it helps, he didn’t seem too angry. More exasperated than anything.”

“And you?”

“Kind of wish you would’ve told me, but I couldn’t have kept it from Oliver, so it makes sense that you didn’t.”

“Right, well, I’ll see you in a couple of hours.”

“I’ll try to get Oliver to go easy in the meantime. I mean, I’m sure you would’ve told us about Cold eventually, and there really isn’t any reason to be passive aggressive or go into that Arrow intimidation mode or anything like that. You would’ve told us, right, Barry?”

I scratch the back of my head. “I hadn’t planned an exact time, but, yeah. I’m sure it would’ve come up. Maybe when Len was conveniently on a job as far away from here as possible, and after I had gotten Cisco and Caitlin on my side to back me up, but it definitely would’ve happened eventually, at some point, in the sort of maybe near future.”

“Maybe don’t tell Oliver all of that.”

“Good idea.”

I slump against the wall as Felicity walks away. To text Len or not to text Len. Maybe I’ll wait until right before I go out for lunch. That way he has time to prepare should the lunch go bad, but not enough time to figure out where we’re eating and making a dramatic entrance to try and out intimidate Oliver. I cannot see that ending well, especially if Len brings up the training sessions as an arguing point. Good thing I don’t scar easily, or I’d have to deal with an Arrow vs Captain Cold showdown in broad daylight.

The longer I keep those two apart, the better.

“Was that Felicity?” someone asks.

I look up and see Joe. “Yeah, turns out she doesn’t know the meaning of privacy either, but at least she’s willing to accommodate for recent developments.”

“Guess that means Queen is in town too.”

I push off the wall. “Don’t think for a moment that Oliver’s going to change anything.”

“I never said that, Barr.”

I wait for the jab, but Joe keeps giving me that look of ‘I don’t know what I’m going to do with you.’ It’s the same one from whenever I used to say my dad was innocent.

“Does that mean you’re ready to listen?” I ask, my tone so clearly desperate. “That you’ll trust me?”

Joe’s expression softens. “I do trust you, Barr, even if you have a bad habit of seeing good in people where there isn’t any.”

I let out a sharp laugh. “For a moment there, I actually believed you. But clearly you don’t trust me anymore, Joe. And I can’t tell when that happened.”

“Maybe when you started trusting criminals over your family.”

“There you go again, trying to make me choose. Iris is fine with Len. Why can’t you be too?”

I walk away before he can answer. Funnily enough, I do care about getting work done. And it’s not like I can speed through it with Julian around. I’m going to have to stay back tonight. I’ll eat dinner here and head straight onto patrol. It’s not like Cisco’s going to be fun to work with considering his radio silence. Caitlin was nice enough to ask how dinner with Iris and Eddie went. But I don’t want to push it. Hopefully, lunch goes quickly. An actual break would be nice.

*

I slide into a booth across from Oliver and Felicity who look like they’re parents about to scold me. Oliver’s leaning forward with his hands clasped together on the table. Felicity is forcing a smile while picking at her food. Oliver opens his mouth. I hold up my hand.

“I need at least two burgers before I can deal with this right now. Give me a moment.”

After the burgers and large side of fries are in front of me, Oliver starts speaking. I try my best to tune him out while devouring my food, but the glare holds my attention.

“I trust you know what you’re doing with Snart.”

“I feel like I should start wearing a sign saying ‘he took my last name’, so people would stop calling him that. It’s getting kind of repetitive.” I take a bite out of my burger, and swallow before Oliver can talk again. “In fact, this whole ‘Len’s a bad person and you should know better’ spiel is getting really repetitive. It’s like nobody realises that I happen to know the man I married. It’s not like we keep major secrets from each other, just work stuff ‘cause of the whole opposite careers thing. Also, please don’t try with the ‘why didn’t you tell me’ thing either. You tried to shoot my husband when you thought we were just friends. Ruined our date and everything. I think I’m kind of justified in keeping it quiet.”

“We’re not angry with you, Barry,” Felicity says.

Oliver shoots her a disgruntled look. “That’s not entirely true. I for one am concerned that a world-renown thief might learn my identity through pillow talk.”

I choke on a fry while laughing. “First of all, Len already figured that out because I don’t have many friends in Star City. Second of all, he’s hardly going to tell anyone, no matter how much he’s paid, because he understands the point of secret identities. He didn’t even tell his sister and best friend about mine until I gave him the all clear. Third, are you two seriously good cop, bad copping me right now? Neither of you even work for the police. I do.”

“Yet you married a thief,” Oliver mutters.

“The first time I saved your life, you immediately tried to kill me, Ollie. You don’t get a say in this. In fact, none of you get a say in this. That’s why I didn’t bother with a wedding, so you lot couldn’t all fight each other to be the first to say I object.”

Oliver slowly sits back with a sigh. “You didn’t tell anyone?”

“Given the majority of their reactions have included yelling at me and acting like I’m incapable of trusting my own judgement, yeah, I think I had a right to keep Len a secret. Now, if you two would please stop invading my husband’s, my sister-in-law’s and my friend’s privacy, I really need to get back to work.”

I call over the waitress to bag my food and stand to leave.

“Congratulations, Barry,” Oliver says.

I turn back. “For what?”

He points to my ring. “For getting married. Bring him to Star City the next time you’re there. I’m sure he’d love a training session.”

Oliver smiles, his eyes light. I nod.

“You have no idea,” I say. “He’s understandably pissed at you.”

“For shooting at him?”

“For shooting me.”

That seems to immediately relax him and Felicity. Good to know more people are realising that Len loves me equally. We might’ve seemed like a mutually terrible decision, but it’s always been the opposite. All it takes is listening for five minutes to realise that. Clearly, some people are better at listening than others.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone seen the first part of Elseworlds yet?
> 
> Spoilers below:
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> Because Oliver had me rolling on the ground laughing seven minutes in. And don’t even get me started on Barry finally getting revenge. Or the massive nostalgia feels of Smallville.


	9. Poor Judgement

I dance through the kitchen, singing along to the radio, and cook up several breakfast foods at once, while Lisa sits at the dining table and laughs at me. Mick’s snoring on the couch, after collapsing there the second they arrived half an hour ago, and Len’s having a shower. The radio station is on a Disney throwback right now, playing Hercules’s _I won’t say I’m in love_. Lisa’s singing the muses’ part in between laughs. The song ends, and I stop dancing for a moment to laugh.

“That was definitely Lenny for a while there,” Lisa says.

“I so wish I had footage of the first time he said it. Len blushing is a rarity as it is. I don’t have any photographic evidence of it happening.”

“Oh, I’m sure I can find a video of him being a stuttering mess after you kissed him the first time. It’s a miracle he didn’t accidentally out your identity then.”

I point a spatula at her. “But how much will that video cost me?”

Lisa smiles sweetly. “I have no idea what you’re talking about, Barry. I’d never charge my own brother-in-law for such a thing.”

“I don’t believe you for a second.”

“You’re already graciously making us all breakfast.”

“To repay you for doing it yesterday.” I speed through a pancake flip and skid to a stop in front of Lisa. “So what will it be?”

She studies her nails. “Well, since you’re offering…”

“I never said that.”

“I was thinking that once your dear friend Cisco is done getting his head out of his ass, you could push him my way.”

“And what are your intentions with my temporarily-on-probation best friend?”

Lisa smirks, something she definitely learned from Len. “Just some light teasing until I’ve decided he’s been punished enough for hurting you, then maybe, and only once he approves of Lenny, a date. This time without leading him into a trap.”

“Dating you is a trap in itself, sis.”

Len walks out while shrugging a shirt on. Lisa looks between the two of us and rolls her eyes before nudging my jaw shut.

“Weren’t you cooking?” she asks.

“Yep.”

“Then you should get back to it, Scarlet,” Len says, kissing my cheek and sitting across from Lisa.

I speed into the kitchen as _I’ll make a man out of you_ comes on the radio. “Let’s get down to business!”

Len shakes his head when Lisa joins in.

“Mick! Wake up and suffer with me!” he yells.

Mick grumbles and rolls over, falling off the couch. “Dammit, Snart. It’s your fault I’m up this early two days in a row.”

“You’re getting free food. Quit complaining.”

Mick trudges over to the table and drops into a seat. “What’s got Red so cheery?”

“The Arrow found out yesterday and somehow Barry managed to get him to approve.”

“Didn’t that guy hunt you across the city and shoot at you a few months ago?”

“Well, thanks to Scarlet, neither Arrow nor his team will be tracking us three in any way.”

“That doesn’t mean go pulling jobs in Star City,” I say between lyrics.

“No fun, Barry,” Len says.

“Tough.”

“You are so whipped, Snart,” Mick says.

Len gives him the finger.

“He’s been whipped since he saw the cutie under the cowl,” Lisa says.

Len moves to stand.

“Ice them and you’ll be sleeping on the couch for a week,” I warn.

Mick and Lisa make whipping sounds, as Len hits his head against the table.

“C’mon, guys. I can name at least three separate occasions when Len said no to me.”

“And the other way around?” Lisa asks.

I pause. “Are we counting the times he tried to gather intel for the Rogues? And the times I deflected the conversation and never explicitly said no?”

“Yes,” Lisa says.

“No,” Len says at the same time.

“See, he just said no right then,” I say, grinning. “Plus, I’m a superhero. I know better than to abuse my power.”

“You got him to agree to a weekend-long Disney marathon,” Lisa points out.

“That he blackmailed me into coming along for as well,” Mick grumbles.

I serve breakfast and take the remaining seat. “Please, I know you both secretly enjoyed it.”

“The songs were stuck in my head for weeks,” Mick says.

“At least you didn’t have Barry singing them the second you thought they were gone,” Len says.

“Sorry, Len. I owed Lisa a favour.”

He groans. “I never should’ve introduced you two.”

Lisa rubs his back while laughing.

I love this. If the team saw these three like this, they wouldn’t be so quick to only see them as criminals.

*

I’m called out to four different unrelated crime scenes in a row in completely opposite parts of the city, and don’t get back to the precinct until lunch. Julian has opted to go as far away from our lab as possible for his lunch breaks because that’s the only way he can get some ‘damn peace and quiet for once’. I put off eating until after processing the evidence, which drags through my break and well past Julian coming back.

“You eaten yet, Allen?” he asks.

“Too busy,” I answer.

“I’m not going to have an overly concerned master thief storm in here if you forget to eat, am I?”

“Nah, had a big breakfast. Should be fine.”

“Good.”

I switch to the next case and glance up, catching the relief in Julian’s expression. “You weren’t concerned about me, were you?”

“I thought you were busy.”

 I smile. “Thanks, Julian.”

An hour later, I still haven’t had the chance to eat, and Julian starts packing up.

“Where are you going?” I ask, not looking up from my screen.

“Suspected meta crime scene downtown.”

“Bye then.”

Julian stops in front of my desk. “You really should eat, you know.”

“Work first, eat later.” I glance up and smile. “Priorities, right?”

“That’s not…” Julian sighs. “See you later, Allen.”

“It wouldn’t kill you to use my first name, you know.”

“We’re not there yet.”

“Okay, Julian.”

He shakes his head and walks out. I focus back on simultaneously running DNA and fingerprint matches, and inputting data for a different scene.

I guess I could eat right now if I use my speed, but there’s a chance Julian could forget something and come back. And I’m done with important conversations this week. Results from the first case pop up, and I focus back on getting them to the detectives on point. The next time I look up, I swear the sun’s a little lower. The door opening breaks my focus. Wally walks in right as my stomach decides to remind me of the skipped lunch.

“Guess that’s why Dad asked me to check on you,” he says. “Got caught up in your work again?”

I push away from my desk and grab my lunch. “Joe and Iris do it too.”

Wally sits across from me. “Must be a West family trait. I set up reminders for when I’m stuck in a project and still manage to work through them.”

“I’m not-.”

“You’re a West in everything but name, Barry.”

“Joe makes that hard to remember some days,” I mutter, avoiding Wally’s gaze by focusing on my food.

“What’s up with you two lately?”

I hold up my left hand. “He doesn’t like my husband.”

“You got married and didn’t tell anyone?”

“I have a page long list of reasons why that has been growing every day for the past four days.”

“But don’t you think Dad doesn’t have a list just as long for reasons you should’ve said something about Snart.”

“I’m sure he-. What did you just say?”

“Uh, Dad might have a list too?”

“No.” I put my food down and stand up. “You said Snart. I never mentioned Len’s name.”

Wally stands up too and backs away. “Dad might’ve told me already.”

“Without asking first?”

“Well, it’s not like you gave him any options considering you’ve been ignoring him lately.”

“I’ve been ignoring him?” I question, before taking a deep breath and going over our conversation in my head. “He put you up to this, didn’t he? Timed it for when Julian would be out for a while?”

“He just seemed really worried about you.”

“Let me guess, Julian mentioned I hadn’t eaten yet, and Joe jumped at the good excuse for you to be here.” I catch Wally’s hurt expression and sigh. “Sorry, Walls. I’ve had a really, really long week, and Joe isn’t exactly making it any easier. You’re always welcome here, of course. You don’t need an excuse or anything like that.”

Wally steps forward. “Are you two okay?”

“No. I don’t think we are. Joe using you and not telling you the full story is bad enough, but-.”

“I mean, he mentioned you were the Flash too and apparently, that makes it that much worse, but I don’t know, Barry. If you’re the Flash or not, I think you’re the only one who really has a say in who you love. I just didn’t like the whole not telling anyone thing because of my own history with keeping secrets from family.”

“He told you what?”

Wally’s eyes widen. “You really are the Flash then?”

“Joe… Joe told you?”

“That video ages ago then, was that made by the actual Captain Cold? No wonder you were pretty much in tears.”

“Joe told you about my biggest secret without asking me first? He told you, knowing that anyone who knows is immediately in ten times more danger?”

“You’re uh, you’re kind of shaking, Barry. A lot. You’re getting a bit blurry around the edges.”

I take a breath, count slowly to ten, and let it out, willing my speed to get under control. “Tell Iris. Tell Iris what Joe did. Tell Iris exactly what Joe told you.” I clench my fists. “Ask Iris to not let him tear us all apart, okay?”

“Is it so bad that I know?”

I unclench my fists and try to relax.

“No. Not at all, Wally. I would’ve told you ages ago if it wasn’t for the risk involved. The problem is Joe spilling my secrets because he’s incapable of listening to a word I say about Len.”

“Are you two going to fight?”

I force the rage back. “Not physically. I don’t want to hurt him.” I run a hand through my hair. “I never wanted to hurt anyone.”

Wally nods, and turns to leave. “No matter what happens between you two, you’ll still be our brother, you know?”

“Thanks, Walls.”        

“And don’t forget to eat,” he adds, before walking out.

I ignore the risk and speed through the rest of my lunch, before drowning myself in work. It’s the only way I’m going to stay calm enough to not put a hole through a wall, or scream. Maybe both. I can’t tell Len about this, not over the phone. There’s no guarantee he wouldn’t storm into the CCPD with all the Rogues at his back in wait for when Joe gets back from the meta crime scene.

I just can’t understand why he’d think doing this would be okay. No. Focus on work. Two dead, no clear murder weapon, or relation between the victims. Doesn’t even look like they knew each other from their positions in the room. Second victim definitely saw the first and was killed less than a minute later. Did she seem him before his death or after? Footprints suggest they walked in at roughly the same time, so before. Most probably acknowledged each other and continued inside.

“Clench your desk any harder and you’ll break it,” Julian comments, cutting through my thoughts.

“You’re back?”

“And you’re tense. Bad case?”

“No. Well, yes, but that’s not why.”

“You eat yet?”

“Is Detective West back?”

Julian unpacks his bag. “He’s downstairs.”

“How urgent is the case?”

“Looks like a one off, clean cut.”

“Detective Thawne could handle it without West’s help then?”

“That depends.”

“On?”

“On whether you’re going to sock West in the face or not. I suggest waiting until after your shifts are over.”

I force my body to relax. “That obvious?”

Julian looks like it physically pains him to do so, but he looks at me with genuine worry. “What happened, Allen?”

“He betrayed my trust, so he could manipulate my foster brother into seeing his side of the argument, even though I’ve acknowledge all the reasons he has to be angry at me so many times that I’m starting to sound like a broken record.”

Julian sighs. “You’re up to date on all your cases?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m going to guess that this visit from Wally West was well under your appointed break time?”

“Yes.”

“Then, as far as I’m concerned, you’ve been working for your appointed hours today already, and are permitted to leave this early. Not that I’d ever consider covering for you again.”

I look back to my screen. “Let me just finish this one thing up first.”

“I try to be nice one time,” he mutters.

I smile, while sending through my analysis. “Thank you, Julian, truly.”

“Well, I’ve found that when you walk into this lab feeling happy, you tend to be far more efficient than when you’re emotionally unstable.”

I finish my work, grab my bag, and storm downstairs, the speed force flaring up in my veins as my anger builds with every step.

Eddie sees me coming first, his eyes widening at my obvious rage. He nudges Joe once, then a bit forcefully, until he finally looks up. Joe seems surprised. He seems surprised by my anger. How the hell can he seem surprised when he shared two of my secrets without asking first, without warning me, and all with the intent to make me feel worse than I already have been feeling thanks in part to him this past week, and after the constant passive aggressiveness regarding Len for months?

Singh wanders out of his office as the entire downstairs of the CCPD goes silent in the wake of me stalking across the floor to where Joe stands.

“Allen? What are you doing down here?”

I relax my anger for a moment and turn to the Captain. “Julian agrees that I’m finished for the day after I worked through my break.”

“Albert agrees with your reason to talk to Detective West?”

“Yes, sir.”

Singh sighs. “No yelling in the precinct, Allen and West.”

“Yes, sir,” I ground out, turning back to Joe. “If you would please come with me for a moment, Detective West?”

Joe puts the file he’s holding down and leads the way. Eddie grabs my arm.

“What happened?”

“Ask Iris. Wally should have filled her in by now.”

“Wally? Why’s Wally involved?”

“Ask Iris.”

I jog to catch up to Joe, forcing down the instinct to speed us somewhere a lot more private. He stops several feet away from the elevator and leans against the wall. I resist the urge to yank him out of sight of everyone else, and instead stand with my back to the officers who’ve finally resumed their normal conversations.

“Why?” I ask at a whisper.

“Why what?”

“Why the hell did you tell Wally?”

“I thought wearing your ring meant it wasn’t a secret.”

“One, wearing my ring means it’s not a secret that I’m married, not who I’m married to. Two, you never even gave me a chance to tell Wally the way I wanted to, at some point after I stop feeling like I’m constantly having to explain the same thing over and over again. Three, you didn’t even tell him the truth of our disagreement, instead saying that I’m the one who hasn’t been listening to you. Four, you _used_ Wally like he was just a pawn to use in an argument that you’re still incapable of listening to the other side of. And five, worst of all, you told him I’m the Flash, you betrayed my trust without a thought, put Wally under the same danger anyone knowing my secret is under, and did it all without telling me, without asking my permission, and without it even being a necessity.”

Joe folds his arms. “You told Lisa Snart and Mick Rory without consulting anyone.”

“It’s _my_ secret,” I whisper furiously. “It’s my secret to share, my secret to choose who not to tell, and my secret to protect, including every single person who knows. Not yours. You’re so damn out of line, Joe, that I don’t even think you can see where the line is anymore.”

“You married Captain Cold, Barry!” Joe yells, properly yells for everyone to hear. “If one of us is out of line, it’s you!”

No. How could he just do that? He didn’t just do that.

“What?” an officer asks.

He did.

“Did he say Allen married Leonard Snart?” someone else asks.

He just shouted that like it didn’t matter, like it wasn’t a secret, like he hadn’t _just_ betrayed my trust to Wally.

“He’s joking, right?”

I clench my fists. “You had no right,” I spit out. “No right.”

I storm past him and jab the elevator button.

Joe puts a hand on my shoulder that I shove off. “Barry-.”

I whirl around on him. “You know the worst part of all this, Joe? You don’t even realise what you’ve done. You don’t even care about what is going to come of this. You don’t even understand how much you’ve hurt me.” I turn and stalk into the elevator. “I don’t know why I ever believed you thought of me as a son.”

The doors close on the chaos erupting in the CCPD. I wipe at my eyes. Perfect. The tears have already started. I need to warn Len. How the hell am I meant to tell him how badly I screwed up this time? Everyone’s going to know, and I can’t do a thing about it.

*

I ran home, I moved through the city in a streak of lightning, constantly rubbing at my eyes, holding back the tears, holding back the anger, holding back the betrayal. How could he do that? I don’t understand. How could he just do something like that to me? I phase through the apartment door and throw my bag against the wall next to me. Len stands up from the dining table, cold gun in pieces, and I just start walking.

I stalk across the room, aiming for the open bedroom door, aiming for somewhere safe, aiming for a place separate from everything else. Len darts forward, blocking my path, and I just drop.

He easily catches me, keeping us both standing as he looks me over. “Barry, what’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. This is my fault. I should’ve just-.”

“Barry, hey, calm down. I don’t believe for a second that you’ve done something wrong.”

I jerk back from him. “You can’t know that.”

“One, I’ve spent enough time in prison to know a guilty person from an innocent one. Two, you have an awful habit of blaming yourself for things out of your control. Three, you’re crying, Scarlet.” He gently wipes away my tears. “When you’re actually guilty of something, you act nonchalant. You certainly don’t shed tears.”

I drop my head onto his shoulder. Len wraps his arms around me tight.

“They know.”

Len kisses my temple. “Who knows?”

“Everyone at the precinct. They all know we’re married.”

“Have you been fired?”

“No. Singh already promised I wouldn’t be, but…”

“But what, Barry?”

“Joe was the one who told them. He yelled it out like falling for you was the equivalent of being guilty of murder. But he’s wrong. He’s so, so wrong. He wouldn’t listen to me. He refused to, so instead he _used_ Wally. Wally didn’t even know what was really going on, but Joe manipulated him, told him I’m the Flash, told him the minimum about us. Then he just tells the whole precinct about us, like you’re some dirty secret I don’t want to get out. But he’s wrong! I didn’t want them all to find out like that. I’d rather it be something casually mentioned, or have you pick me up from work with a kiss or something. Not this. I didn’t want this.”

Len tenses under me. “Barry,” he says softly.

I shake my head. “No, no, no. I don’t regret us. I’ll never regret us. You can’t say I told you so. You can’t-.”

“I wouldn’t.” Len cradles my face in his hands. “You hear me, Barry Allen? I wouldn’t.”

I nod. Len keeps staring at me, eyes completely focussed on mine. “Okay,” I mumble.

He relaxes. “Now, why was your first instinct to apologise? Cause that’s what I can’t understand, Scarlet. You’re upset, sure. You have every right to be upset. But why say sorry to me?”

I bite my lip. “Cause now everyone will find out,” I whisper.

“So?”

“There’s no way the CCPD will keep this quiet. Everyone in Central’s going to find out that you’re married to me, a CSI. Your Rogues-.”

“Already know I’m married to a badge. Couldn’t care less.”

“Your rivals-.”

“Going to be a bit of a problem, but I’ve got enough power that nobody’ll dare cross me. Mick’s been itching to burn a building down lately. First person to so much as think about going after you to get to me will find themselves homeless.”

“Your reputation.”

Len brings my left hand to his lips and kisses my ring. “This,” he kisses me, “you, are worth more to be than some reputation, Barry. I love three people. I would sacrifice anything for three people. If it truly came to it, I’d even give up thieving for three people. Lisa, Mick, and you.”

“I wouldn’t ask that of you.”

“I know. Same as, I wouldn’t ask you give up being the Flash.”

“But if I had to do it…”

“I understand.”

I sink into his arms again. “I love you. And I guess now I can shout it from the rooftops.”

“Just don’t do it as the Flash. Wouldn’t want the CCPD coming down on me for two-timing.”

“They’d probably just be pissed for the Flash’s sake, rather than Barry Allen, dorky CSI.”

“And yet, nobody else would’ve lasted so long as the Scarlet Speedster.”

“You can’t know that.”

“If it was anybody else trying to get me to back down after I learned their identity, I would’ve iced them then and there. At least then, I’d have been a true nemesis.”

“You’re not letting that go, are you?”

Len shrugs. “Suppose husband’s a good enough substitute.”

I can’t help smiling for the first time since leaving the precinct. “Thank you, Len.”

“Always, Scarlet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter title is an understatement relating to Joe right now. I can promise that he won't be this bad for the entire fic, but I'm not about to have him suddenly come to his senses, apologise and end up just fine with Barry. Anyway, in this AU Wally never found out Barry was the Flash because Zoom didn't take Henry Allen from the West house. Sorry for kind of brushing over that revelation (just like canon did), but just like canon, Barry was not in the state-of-mind to handle it at all.


	10. Intervention

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't usually leave any warnings, but I need to say: This chapter is intense. It's necessary for plot and character progression, but as you can probably tell from the title, it is not going to be a fun ride for Barry. 
> 
> Warning for panic attack.

Ten seconds and the building blows. Twenty hostages. Four bullets heading their way. Six hostiles. The speed force rises in me and everything slows. Bullets first. I snatch them out of the air and throw them back into the barrel of the guns. Another shot. I swat it to the ground. Take out the guns next. Now the bomb. No time to disarm. Sky or harbour? Too far away for the second. I pick the bomb up and leave the building, speeding through the city until I find a tall enough building. Three seconds.

I run up the side of the building, pushing against my limits. I sling my arm back, leap off the spire, and throw. The bomb soars through the air, just reaching the top of its arc, and explodes, the shockwave slamming into me as I start to fall. I tumble towards the street below, my body flipping through the air until I’m headfirst. I force myself to keep flipping until my feet are aligned with the building again. And I run.

Back to the bank, back to the hostage situation gone wrong, back to the thieves who’ve picked their guns up.

“Sorry, guys. Afraid you’re not rid of me yet,” I say, dodging a spray of bullets, and confiscating their guns again. “Now, why don’t you just give in and let these nice people enjoy their Friday night … banking.” I turn to the hostages. “Who banks on a Friday night?”

“Focus, Barry,” Caitlin says over comms.

I turn back to the thieves in time to dodge a punch. “Really?”

The thief looks surprised. I have him and the rest of his crew tied up in a corner within two seconds.

“Amateurs,” I mutter, freeing the hostages next. “Everyone okay?”

A few people look like they’re in shock, so I stick around comforting them until the CCPD and ambulances arrive to take over. I nod to Singh, who kept Joe far away from my lab all day today, and I explain the situation to one of the detectives. They need to know that amateur thieves are packing serious explosives. Somehow, I end up with someone from the bomb squad explaining how to disarm a basic bomb, so I don’t have to explode it above the city again.

*

I finally get to run back to Star Labs, knocking the side of my head with my hand as I walk into the cortex. “You think that blast gave me a concussion or something? ‘Cause I can still hear a ringing in my ear.”

“Barry,” Caitlin starts.

“My hearing’s still good enough to hear your disapproval, Cait, but how could I not get distracted? I didn’t even know banks opened that late. I feel like that would be something I’d know thanks to Len, or at least from years of superheroing.”

“Barry,” Cisco says, like he’s warning me.

Why the heck would he be-? I look up and immediately tense.

“Why is Joe here?” I ask, voice tight.

“Because he’s allowed to be,” Cisco says, like I asked the obvious.

“Last time I checked, people who out my secret identity just because they _feel_ like it aren’t allowed here,” I snap, my fists clenched. “Get the hell out of here now, Joe, or I will force you out.”

“He did what?” Caitlin asks.

“Wally deserved to know, Barr,” Joe says.

“No! No, you do not get to call me that. You _know_ it wasn’t a matter of whether he deserved to know or not. It was you trying to use Wally against me in our disagreement over Len. It was you, Joe, deciding what’s best for everyone without listening to our opinions. Did you know I spent all of last night at Iris’s trying to explain to her why showing up at the precinct today to punch you in the face was a terrible idea? And do you have any idea how hard that was for me when I had to physically restrain myself from knocking you to the floor yesterday?”

“Okay, I’m starting to agree with your theory,” Caitlin says quietly. “This anger does seem like an overreaction.”

Something heavy drops in my gut. “An overreaction?” I ask slowly. “You think that being royally pissed off is an overreaction after Joe shouted out in front of the entire precinct that I married Captain Cold? You think this anger is an _overreaction_? It’s been only one day since then, and I have had colleagues that I’ve worked with for years acting like I don’t exist. I have had people I respected call me Leonard Snart’s little bitch. I have had random people on the street that I’ve never even met before, barging into me, and calling me a traitor to my badge. I’ve had all of that on top of you three acting like I’ve lost my goddamn mind for loving Len.” The speed force rises up in me, and I force it right back down. “Trust me, I am underreacting.”

“I’m sorry that you went through all of that for nothing, Barry, but-,” Joe starts.

I speed across the room and slam him against the wall. “Tell me again that marrying the man I love is nothing. I dare you.”

“Barry!” Cisco yells, putting a hand on my shoulder.

I turn my glare on him. “You tossed me around this room before you even knew it was Len that I married. You don’t get the _right_ to comment on my anger.”

Cisco flinches back, eyes downcast. “Just… Just hear what he has to say. ‘Cause it makes sense, Barry. It makes a lot of sense.”

Caitlin approaches with her hands up. “Joe didn’t tell us about what he did in the CCPD or telling Wally about the Flash without asking you first. If he had, I for one, wouldn’t have heard him out. Just now, I thought you were overreacting to Joe telling Wally about two of your secrets, not telling everyone about Len. You’re okay to be angry right now, Barry, but I want you to think about the physical advantage you have over Joe and how easy it would be for you to accidentally permanently damage him.”

I release Joe and speed to the other side of the room, shaking. “I need him to leave,” I say.

My hands start vibrating. I clench them to keep them still.

“Please,” I beg.

“I think it’ll be better for everyone if you listen to his theory,” Caitlin says. “After we’ve sorted it out, and proved him right or wrong-”

“I’m not wrong,” Joe interrupts.

Caitlin silences him with a sharp look. “After we’ve proved him right or wrong, maybe certain someones can start apologising for how they’ve acted recently.”

I clap my hands together to cover how much they’re still shaking. “Right, so what’s got Joe How Does One Science West coming up with theories?”

And I know detectives also come up with theories, but there’s only so much I can anger I can hold onto right now.

“I think Snart had Bivolo use his powers against you to make you think that you want to be with Snart, so he could have the Flash at his beck and call.”

What the actual hell?

“Sorry, that blast must’ve really messed up my hearing because I definitely just misheard you,” I say.

Caitlin sighs. “You heard correctly.”

“You don’t all seriously believe I spent the past year of being with Len while whammied by Bivolo, do you?”

Joe looks deadly serious, and I don’t know whether I want to laugh at the sheer insanity of the idea or cry at how he’s still not listening to a word of reason. Cisco refuses to so much as look my way.

“It’d make sense,” he mumbles.

I choose option a, laugh. Nobody joins me.

“You realise how ridiculous you sound, right? I haven’t even seen Bivolo outside of being the Flash and Caitlin always scans me afterwards to make sure I haven’t been affected.”

“She checks for induced rage, not-,” Joe cuts himself off. “You know.”

“Love? Not love? Is it so hard for you to say that I love Len? Is it so hard for you to believe that I chose to be with him of my own free will? Is it so hard to just trust me?”

“I trust you just fine when you’re not under the influence.”

I run my hands down my face and try not to scream. “Do you even hear yourself right now? You’re all being more paranoid than Oliver and he actually approves of Len. Did you know Ollie was the first one to congratulate me? You’ve all been so busy getting angry at me, that Oliver Shoot First Queen was the first to congratulate me, three days after I got married. Surely, I’m not the only one who sees what’s backwards about that sentence.”

“I believe you that you love Len, Barry,” Caitlin says. “The way you talk about him and the way you interact with him tells me that much. All I’m asking for is one scan to 100% prove that you’re not being influenced by a meta, Bivolo or not.”

“One scan and you’ll all drop it?”

Caitlin nods. Cisco doesn’t respond in any way. Joe still looks like the scan will reveal that he’s been right all along.

“Fine.”

Caitlin leads me to the medbay and gestures for me to sit. Cisco and Joe follow, Cisco standing awkwardly at the edge of the room, Joe standing arms crossed in the entrance. I roll my eyes and turn to Caitlin. She fits the portable brain scanner we built for post-Bivolo encounters onto my temples. My hands vibrate again. I sit on them to hide it. Once this is done, I’ll get away from Joe, and my powers should relax again. Maybe I can find Eddie and go a round with a punching bag to wear myself out.

“Well, the area in Barry’s brain that signifies love is active, but no more than would be abnormal. The area Bivolo normally affects, the rage centre, is working overdrive, but nowhere near meta-affected levels.”

“Gee, I wonder why I might be angry,” I mutter.

“And the fear-.” Caitlin cuts herself off and takes the scanner off me. “Barry…”

I jump off the chair and speed into the cortex, aiming to leave, but my speed flickers out for a moment and I crash into the wall.

“Dammit!”

“Barry, what’s wrong with your powers?” Caitlin asks, marching towards me with her serious doctor face on.

“Nothing. Nothing’s wrong. I guess patrol just took it out of me.”

“You can’t expect me to believe you when I just saw how much fear is taking over your brain right now.”           

“How much what?” Cisco asks.

“Fear, she said fear,” Joe says, that too-concerned expression of his back, like he’s seeing right through me. Then he opens his mouth. “Bivolo must’ve made it so he’s scared around us. That way he over relies on Snart.”

Cisco frowns. “That doesn’t-”

“Why is it so hard for you to admit you’re wrong?” I shout. “Len would never do anything that you’ve been saying. Bivolo can’t even get his powers to work on more than rage, no matter how much he’s been trying lately. Something you would know if you just payed attention to reason. But you don’t care, Joe. You don’t care about the truth. You don’t care about what I want. You don’t care about me if I’m not being a perfect son.”

Joe recoils like I hit him.

Caitlin reaches for me. “Barry, you need to calm down.”

I yank my entire body away from her. “No, I need-.”

My voice cuts off. I try to speak, but I can’t. I can’t speak. No, I can’t breathe. I can’t breathe. How do I breathe? I can’t.

Air suddenly assaults my throat, burning its way down and reaching my lungs. Right. That’s how. My entire arm vibrates this time. I stare at it in horror. It stops. I need something. I need it right now.

“I-I need to leave,” I gasp.

Joe’s hand is suddenly on my wrist. I can’t move. If I do, my speed could act up again. I can’t move. I could snap his wrist. I can’t move. Joe seems to take that as a good thing, as some sign that they’re right. I can’t move. I can’t move. I can’t move.

“Let me go,” I choke out. It comes out as a sob.

I shake my head. Joe comes closer, for a hug. I shake my head. My whole body vibrates. I freeze. But they didn’t notice. They don’t see how close I am to losing control. Or do they? Do they even care? Joe pulls me into a tight hug. I can’t stop the tears from falling. I can’t move. I can’t move. I can’t move.

“Please,” I croak.

“It’s okay, Barr.”

No. It’s not okay. It’s not okay. Why won’t anyone see that it’s not okay? I need to leave. Let me go. Please. WHY WON’T YOU LISTEN TO ME? Len. I need Len. Len would help. I need Len right now. He’d understand. He’d see. He’d help.

“I need Len.”

Joe tenses. “I’m not letting that monster anywhere near you again, Barr. You’re safe.”

“No! I need Len! Please!”

“This must be worse than we thought,” Joe says to Caitlin, like I’m not there, like I don’t matter, like I only count when I say what they want.

I need Len.

Caitlin bristles. “I told you, I’m not seeing any sign of Bivolo’s influence. Barry’s panicking isn’t a withdrawal. You’re the one making it worse.”

“Maybe try letting go of him,” Cisco mumbles, refusing to look my way.

Because he hates me. Because they all hate me. Because they won’t let me see Len.

“Why? So he can run back to that bastard?”

“Because _that bastard_ is already here, and if you don’t get your hands off my husband in the next five seconds, I will ice you.”

“ _Len_!”

Joe finally lets me go. I whip around to see Len standing arms crossed in the cortex, in full Captain Cold regalia with his cold gun holstered. His eyes narrow in on mine and his anger blinks out. I stumble towards him and go to collapse in his arms, but then my whole body vibrates again. No. No. No. I need him. Please. My legs give out. I sink to the floor. My body constantly vibrating. Len crouches down in front of me and reaches out. I flinch back.

“Oh, _Barry_.”

I duck my head and hide the tears, but he’s already seen them.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” I sob.

Len unholsters his cold gun, charges it, and slides it across the floor to me. I look up at him in confusion, and he gestures to the gun. Oh. I reach out and touch the icy metal. The coldness travels up my body and finally slows it down. I let out a sigh of relief. Len holds out his hand.

“Can I touch you now?” he asks quietly. I sling my arms around his neck and sob into his shoulder. “I’ll take that as a yes, Scarlet.”

Len wraps one arm around my back and holsters his cold gun, before gently standing us up. He kisses my temple and rubs his arm up and down my back.

“Do you want to leave now?” he asks.

“Wait a moment-,” Joe starts.

“I wasn’t asking you,” Len snaps back. I still. Len sighs. “Sorry, Scarlet.”

“It’s fine,” I mumble. “I know you’re just trying to protect me.”

“That doesn’t make it fine and you know it.”

I shrug. “Seems that way for everyone else.”

Len swears under his breath and pulls back, so he can lean his forehead on mine. He searches for something in my eyes and seems to find it. Len softly kisses me, before moving me to stand next to him, his arm still wrapped around my waist. I lean my head back onto his shoulder, and wrap an arm around him, unable to help the small smile to contrast against my dried tears.

Len’s here. Everything will be fine.

Cisco reaches out. “Barry-.”

Len whips his gun up and charges it, all without dislodging me. “Don’t you dare. You hurt my Scarlet again, and I’ll have all my Rogues on your ass faster than you can say meta.”

“Why are you even here?” Joe asks.

“I just saw news footage of my husband falling through the sky after a bomb exploded in his face. Why the hell do you think I’m here?” Len snaps.

“Sorry about that,” I say, moving my head off his shoulder.

Len shakes his head. “Just wanted to see if you were okay, Barry. Clearly, I was right to check on you.”

“Joe thought Bivolo whammied me into loving you.” I choke out a laugh. It doesn’t sound right. “He still won’t believe me.”

“Roy is terrible at controlling his powers. The one time he tried any other emotion aside from rage, he made Mick cry whenever he saw a specific part of a wall in our safe house. That wasn’t fun for anyone involved, especially my future heist plans.”

“And that’s all you care about, your heists,” Joe spits.

Len holsters his cold gun. “I like stealing things. It’s fun. I’ll never deny that. But Barry? I love him. And when you love someone, you care about them, about every part of them, no matter if you disagree with it or not. Like his guilt complex. Not a fan of it. Do I give him hell over it though? No. Because you don’t do that to someone you love.

“You want to be angry at someone, _Detective_? Be angry at me. I’m the one you hate, not Barry. Yet all you’ve been doing all week is proving the exact reasons he didn’t tell you right. That you’re incapable of respecting his personal decisions. That you can’t keep my name a secret, so nobody with a grudge against me targets Barry. That you might as well be on that list for how you’ve been treating him as of late.

“Getting married is meant to be one of the happiest times in a person’s life and you’ve reduced Barry to tears far too many times this week. The _only_ thing standing between you and a conversation with a pissed off Mick and Lisa is me. And I’m only holding myself back because I can’t stand to see my _husband_ cry. At least I know when my anger at a person he loves is going to hurt Barry more than anyone else.”

Joe stares between us blankly. “You’re really in love with a criminal?”

“I married Len,” I ground out, dislodging myself from him. “And I know you don’t approve, that none of you really approve, but I still did it. Because I love him so, so much, that even with the hell week I’ve had, he is still worth it. He is worth it all.”

Joe frowns harder, like he’s processing it, but it’s not quite clicking. He shakes his head. “I can’t deal with this.”

“Then leave,” I say. “Stop trying to make excuses for me. Stop getting angry over not being able to control me. Stop ruining how much I care about you too. Just leave until you can handle being a reasonable person.”

Joe nods and walks past us. “You know I only want once best for you, right, Barry?”

“Sometimes what you think is best for me and what’s actually best for me aren’t the same thing. Hell, sometimes what I think is best for me isn’t actually correct, but this, this I’m sure about.”

Joe doesn’t seem to have a response for that, so he just leaves instead.

I let out a breath of air I didn’t know I was holding, and just like that, the tension in my body drops. The speed force stops itching at my fingertips and a sharp pain in my head eases a little. 

“Are we all done on heavy emotional moments now?” I ask.

Caitlin nods. “I think so.”

I look to Cisco who finally meets my eyes, guilt shining in his. “Yeah, sorry about…”

“Save it.” I wince at his expression. “Sorry, Cisco, not like that. I swear I’m not meaning to phrase things so badly lately, just ask Wally. I took my frustration out on him and he hadn’t even done anything wrong.”

I’m pretty sure nobody in the room misses the unsaid ‘unlike you’, but I’m just too tired to do this better right now.

I turn to Len. “Can we just go now?”

“Okay, Scarlet.” He completely switches tones from soft to ‘don’t mess with me’. “Barry and I are visiting Kara this weekend. If you have a meta problem, Mick and Lisa will help out. Hell, if it gets bad, Queen can help too. I’m sure Central City can last two days without the Flash. He could definitely use two days without Central.”

Cisco wrings his hands. “There’s no need to use an extrapolator. I’ll breach you there. It’s the least I could do after…”

“Thanks, Cisco,” I say.

Len groans. “You’re too quick to forgive, Scarlet.”

“I’m still waiting for him to accept you to properly forgive him, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be grateful for his help in the meantime.”

“Right, well, I’ll be here once you pack,” Cisco says.

I look at Len. “I’m guessing the bags are already sitting packed on our bed.”

“Know me too well, Barry.”

I speed home, grab them and speed back to Star Labs, wordlessly passing Len his bag. Cisco looks between us like he’s still not sure what he’s seeing before he opens a breach. “Earth 38. I’ll come get you-.”

Len holds up an extrapolator. “No need.”

“You swiped that on your way in, didn’t you,” I say, waving goodbye to Caitlin and Cisco.

Len smirks. “You know, as joint owner of Star Labs, I have to say, the security is terrible here.”

“Marrying me doesn’t make you joint owner,” I say, while stepping through the breach.

“You wound me, Scarlet,” are the first words out of Len’s mouth on a different Earth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so Barry is not an objective narrator, especially once he’s started to panic. Don’t get me wrong, how they treat him in this chapter is not right at all. But the way he sees Caitlin and Cisco is skewed by the way Joe’s acting once he’s entered a panic mode. He can’t separate their motives and attitudes from each other in that state, not until Len breaks him out of it.


	11. Karaoke

Len walks through Kara’s empty apartment like he owns the place, dumps his bag next to a couch, and pulls out some casual clothes.

“Get changed,” he says. “I doubt you want to sleep in your Flash suit.”

“Sleep?” I ask, while grabbing my clothes out.

“Yes, Scarlet, sleep. You’ve been through too much physically, emotionally, and mentally in the past few hours to not need sleep, even if you’re running on adrenaline right now.”

“But I can’t just have a nap while Kara’s not even home.”

“I’m sure she’ll understand. If not, well, I’ll deal with it. You sleep.”

My sigh turns into a yawn. “Okay, you might be a little right.”

Len sits on the couch end closest to the door and gently tugs me down to rest my head on his leg. “I usually am when it comes to you.”

I yawn again as Len runs a hand through my hair. “You’ll wake me up when she gets home?”

“Sure.”

Len’s probably lying, but I can’t keep my eyes open long enough to care. “Love you, Len.”

“Love you too, Barry.”

*

“Who are you and what are you doing in my apartment?” a familiar voice asks, waking me up.

Len’s hand keeps stroking my hair, so he’s got this. No need to open my eyes yet.

“Len Allen.”

“Any relation to a Barry Allen?” Kara walks closer. “Who is right there apparently.”

Len laughs. “Husband.”

“Husband? That’s new.”

“Since Sunday,” Len says. “Been together for almost a year though, and for some reason he thinks I can’t tell the difference between when he’s sleeping or faking it.”

I open my eyes while rolling them. “I hadn’t-,” I yawn, “properly woken up yet.”

“Don’t get me wrong, Scarlet. I’m glad you wake up the second someone else enters a room. Means I don’t have to worry as much when I’m out of town.”

I slowly sit up, immediately dropping my head on Len’s shoulder and snuggling into his side.

“Still tired?” he asks.

“A bomb blast will do that to you.”

Kara sits on the couch opposite us. “Bomb blast?”

“Normal Flash stuff. Amateur bank robbers made some bad decisions. I almost fell to my death.”

Len tenses under me. “It didn’t look that close in the news.”

“If it knocked me any further away from the building, Cisco would’ve had to breach me out of there.”

“I’m teaching you how to disarm any kind of bomb when we get home.”

“CCPD’s bomb squad already taught me the basics. They were really helpful. Nice contrast to the precinct today.”

Len sighs and squeezes my hand.

“Sorry, Scarlet.”

“Not your fault.”        

“So, then,” Kara says, giving me her ‘what the hell, Barry’ look.

“Hi. Needed a break from my Earth, brought Len. Hope you don’t mind if we crash here for a couple of nights.”

Kara waves it off. “Once you’ve breached a hole in the fabric of two worlds together, offering a place to sleep is kind of implied. That’s definitely a rule somewhere.”

“Right,” I say, rubbing the back of my neck. “You can say what you want to say now, Kara.”

“You got married and didn’t tell me? Uncool, Barry.”

I shrug. “I mean, I would’ve mentioned that I was dating someone when we met, but somebody didn’t agree to a label until I proposed.”

“Kind of hard to label a relationship with your nemesis.”

I roll my eyes, moving off Len and sitting up properly. “For the last time, you’ve never been my nemesis. First it was Thawne, then Zoom, but never you.”

“What about now?”

“Probably Julian and he’s more Barry Allen’s rival than Flash’s.”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Kara says. She points between the two of us. “What do you mean nemesis?”

Len smirks. “I was the Flash’s first serious villain.”

“I mean-,” I start.

“And the longest lasting.”

“Well-.”

“And the most challenging.”

“That’s not completely true.”

“When was the last time you beat me?”

I open my mouth and find no answer. “To be fair, you do use a gun specifically designed against my powers.”

“Anyone can point and shoot, Barry. The reason I beat you so often is because I’m a master planner and you run headfirst into every fight without one.”

“Hold up,” Kara says. “I thought you taught me to case my surroundings first.”

Len laughs. “I’m sure he did, probably after learning the hard way. Scarlet still manages to miss traps and the like all the time. A simple diversion and I always manage to get away.”

“What about that one time I took out you and your Rogues before you could even fire?”

“You were upset at the time. It was an outlier.”

“You two are cute together.”

I look back at Kara. “You don’t care that Len’s a villain?”

“What’s the worst thing he’s done in the last year?”

“Stolen millions of dollars’ worth of goods,” Len answers.

“Stole my favourite mug without realising it,” I answer.

Len sighs. “You’re never going to let that go, are you?”

“You had just been busted from Iron Heights, and you immediately stole something of mine after I did you the curtesy of not putting you back behind bars.”

“Barry, you got me pardoned for all that. You’ve got to let go of the mug.”

“Even after I moved in with you, you still made sure to use it whenever I wanted to.”

“I’m a thief. What’d you expect?”

“That’s it?” Kara asks.

Len narrows his eyes. “What do you mean?”

“How’s being a thief make you a villain?”

“Oh, it was probably the people I killed without hesitation back when we first met. Plus, that time I kidnapped one of Barry’s friends and strapped a bomb to her chair. Or that time I kidnapped his other friend and that friend’s brother, so I could torture them and find out the Flash’s identity. Or that time I double-crossed him and let loose a bunch of meta criminals who hated his guts. Or the years of being a world-class ruthless master thief.”

Kara stares at Len blankly. “That would explain it.”

I shake my head. “That was in our first year of knowing each other. Len’s only killed one other person since he agreed to stop, and that, that was a difficult circumstance. He’s been pardoned for that particular crime. The others, I might’ve erased any trace of in another deal, but really the worst he’s done lately is steal, not that the CCPD has enough evidence to charge him.”

Kara holds out her hand. “Well, it’s nice meeting you, Len.”

Len shakes her hand, a small genuine smile on his face. “Nice meeting you too. Are all aliens this accepting of more bizarre couples or is it just you?”

“Barry,” Kara scolds.

“It’s not like he ever could betray your secret identity with the whole living on another Earth thing. And how could I not talk about my alien friend, because that’s just too cool not to mention? If it helps, I didn’t tell him the Arrow’s identity. He figured it out from the limited amount of people I know in Star City, so really if I talked about my friends Kara Danvers and Supergirl from another Earth, he totally would’ve figured it out.”

Kara folds her arms. “People haven’t been accepting of your relationship?”

“Ah, well, no. Kind of why we’re here actually. I’ve had a pretty bad week and-.”

“You described it as a hell week, Scarlet. Don’t understate it now.”

“Well, yeah. I’d really not like to talk about it at all this weekend.”

Kara nods. “Okay. Let me set up the sofa.”

She does it at superspeed. Apparently, we were sitting on the sofa. Len doesn’t even blink, earning a grin from Kara.

“Used to that then?”

“I’m married to a speedster and have three other metas work for me.”

“Mardon, Hathaway, and Bivolo?” I ask.

“Of course,” Len answers automatically, before sighing deeply, and looking at me with complete exasperation. “You know, if I can’t trick CCPD intel out of you, it’s unfair of you to do the same to me.”

“You trust too easily.”

“I really don’t.”

“You do when it comes to me.”

“Well, the Flash has always been my biggest weakness.”

I grin. “Only ‘cause I make you want to show off during heists.”

“The effect you have on me is much worse than just that, Scarlet.” Len smiles fondly. “But you’re worth it. Even if you’re still under some strange impression I’ve secretly got a heart of gold under all the ice.”

“I never said that.” I poke his chest, right where his heart is. “You’ve got a heart of gold, fire, and lightning.”

“Cute,” he drawls.

I laugh. “You know I’m right, Cold.”

“Whatever you say, Flash.”

Kara clears her throat rather pointedly from her bedroom’s archway in her pyjamas. “As adorable as you two are, I also had a long night of superheroing, so I’m heading to bed.”

I go red and duck my head, rubbing the back of my neck. “When did you…”

Kara shakes her head. “Goodnight, Barry and Len.”

“Night Kara,” I say.

Len has a similar expression on his face that he did after Iris hugged him goodbye Tuesday night, like he’s not quite sure why she’s being so accepting.

I jab him with my elbow, prompting a quiet, “Goodnight, Kara.”

I wait all of three seconds after she closes the curtains to collapse in a fit of laughter.

“You looked so confused. I wish I had a picture.”

Len lies down next to me, scowling. “I’m not adorable.”

I look at his face and laugh harder. “Sorry, I can’t help it.” I kiss his frown while grinning. “I knew visiting Kara was a good idea.”

“Probably should’ve mentioned that we don’t need two pillows though,” Len says, pulling mine out from under my head and tossing it behind the sofa.

I just roll my eyes and rest my head on his chest. “I don’t think I’ve ever used my pillow at home.”

“Not even when I’m out of town?”

“Nah, I just use yours.”

Len’s chest hitches “Go to sleep, Barry,” he says breathlessly.

I smile. “And to think, you tried to run away from this.”

“Should’ve known better than trying to outrun the Scarlet Speedster.”

“Wasn’t your best plan.”

“I don’t know, turned out just fine by the looks of it.”

I yawn. “Still can’t believe you use to send daily texts of reasons why us being together was a bad idea.”

“To be fair, I couldn’t believe someone as good as you wanted to be with someone like me.”

“And now?” I ask.

“Now I’m too happy that you’re mine to care about the whys.”

I push myself up a little to look Len in the eye. “You do know why though, right?”

Len kisses me softly. “Yes, Scarlet. You don’t have to explain yourself to me. I think you’ve had enough of that this week. You’re worrying where there’s no need to.”

“Just making sure.”

“I know, and I love you for it.”

“I-,” I cut myself off with a yawn, “love you too.”

Len kisses me again and guides my head back down. “Sleep now, Barry.”

I wish I could grab this feeling right here, this sense of safety, contentment and love, and explain it, so whenever people claim Len’s incapable of it, they’ll realise just how wrong they are. The only thing keeping me going over the last week is the fact that I know they’re so, so wrong about him. And whether everyone realises that, or not, I’ll still have him. When it comes down to it, that’s what matters most.

*

Kara’s a breath of fresh air. When Len finally snaps from the kindness overload and asks why she isn’t making a big deal about what he does for a living, she just smiles.

“Did your sister make a big deal out of Barry being both the Flash and a CSI?”

“She was too busy teasing the crap out of me to care.”

“Well there you go. I’m too happy that Barry’s found someone he wholeheartedly loves and that treats him right to care about what you do for a living. You’ve already said that you stopped hurting people, and while I definitely don’t approve of stealing, if Barry’s okay with you doing it, then I am too.”

Len stabs his sugary excuse for a cereal (his words not mine) with his spoon. “But you don’t know me. How can you trust me?”

“I don’t trust you. But I do trust Barry and his judgement. I also know from watching the two of you together that if you ever did something to hurt Barry, you’d beat yourself up enough that I don’t have to make any sort of threats to do the same.” She superheats the end of her spoon with a smile. “And if the people Barry trusts most to have his back hurt him by taking out their problems with you on him again, I’ll be having a very … productive first trip to your Earth.”

Kara lightly blows on the spoon, returning it to its normal temperature, and overloading it with cereal. “Okay?”

Len turns to me with a smirk. “I’m starting to like your choice in friends, Scarlet.”

“Hey, you’ve never had a problem with Eddie and…” I’m sure there’s someone else who accepted us right away. Iris maybe, but that was after not liking Len as even a friend. Singh then, but he’s my boss, not friend. I don’t think he counts. I swallow heavily and turn to Len. “There’s someone else, right? It wasn’t just him?”

Len squeezes my hand. “Wally?”

“He uh… I’m not sure. I actually haven’t had the chance to talk to him since Joe-.” I wipe at my eyes and force a smile. “This weekend isn’t meant to be about that. I don’t want to think about what he did. About him setting off a…” I close my eyes to try and stop the tears from escaping. “Haven’t had one of those since Mum died.”

A small hand rubs circles in my back. “Do you want to talk about what happened?” Kara asks. “Or would you rather we go do something fun to get your mind off it?”

“I’d rather we go do something fun, but I should probably tell you first. Just promise me you won’t go and…”

Kara’s hand stills. “I promise.”

So I tell her, everything, not just from this week, but everything from accidently visiting Len in Iron Heights. Kara sits down after I tell her about Len jumping from my bedroom window to escape our first kiss, laughing the entire time through that bit, while Len grumbles under his breath and goes the barest tint of red. Len chimes in occasionally, whether to add something I didn’t have the full picture of, or to explain something that happened that I can’t manage to cover myself, like Dad and Zoom.

When I get to this week, one of my hands ends up in Len’s, and the other in Kara’s, who looks like she’s trying her best to only clench her left hand instead of the one holding mine. After I reach coming to Earth 38, Kara takes a deep breath, lets go of my hand, and stands up.

“So, Barry Allen, what say you to an afternoon of karaoke?”

I grin and look to Len, who rolls his eyes while smiling. “I’d love to,” I answer.

*

Kara talks to her sister on the phone as we walk towards the karaoke bar that she insists has the best selection of songs. I grin at the fact that nobody on the street recognises Len and take the opportunity to hold his hand in public. Len glances down at our hands, then back at me, with that amused yet confused smile of his.

“I just want to do this while we can,” I say.

Len’s smile softens at that. “We can do this at home too if you want.”

“Maybe.” I tug him closer while we walk. “I do like the advantages.”

“Like seriously, Alex, they won’t stop flirting for more than ten seconds. It’s painfully adorable,” Kara says, prompting a chuckle from Len.

“I think I’ve found my second favourite hero,” he says.

I shrug. “Only fair. After all, Lisa’s my second favourite villain.”

“Don’t let Mick catch you saying that.”

“He wouldn’t care. He’d just grunt, drink the beer he stole from our fridge, and continue pretending he doesn’t like Disney.”

Len looks down. “If it weren’t for you, I’d never have reconnected with Mick.”

“What’d I do?”

He smirks. “Made me need to up my game.”

Wait.

“So me being a common enemy was how you two became best friends again?”

“Yep.”

“I don’t know whether I should be offended or proud,” I say. “I’m a little of both, honestly.”

“That’s how I like you best.”

“Offended or-.”

“Honest.”

I deflate. “Even when the truth isn’t something you want?”

“I lie enough for the both of us,” Len says, his voice low. “I’d rather have your honest imperfections than your faked perfection. I married Barry Allen, nightmares and hero complex and all.”

“That was the night I realised this was something … more,” I mumble. “The day I knew for sure was the day I almost…”

“Went back?” Len offers. I nod. He sighs. “Same, for both I mean. I’ll never forget how terrified I was both times. You scared the hell out of me, Scarlet. Still do sometimes.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry for who you are, Barry. You’ll always want to run headfirst into danger to save lives. It’s what drew me to you in the first place. Your biggest weakness isn’t the cold. It’s your heart.”

“Good thing I have you to protect it then,” I say.

Len laughs. “Okay, that was cheesy, even for us.”

“You took Cisco’s moniker for you and ran with it, making every temperature related pun on the planet. There is no cheese for us.”

“Except when taking photos.”

I let go of his hand and fold my arms. “Nope. I’m not letting you get away with that.”

“Going to stop me, Scarlet?”

“Your jokes are so notoriously bad, they’re criminal,” I say, immediately regretting it from the huge smile on Len’s face.

Thankfully, Kara comes to my rescue. “Alright, boys, we’re here. Alex might swing by later if she has time.”

We get a table close to the stage. Len heads to the bar to get us some snacks, while Kara and I go over potential songs.

“He’s good for you,” she says, between suggestions.

I look back at Len, share a smile with him, and look back. “Wish more people would see that.”

“Why didn’t you tell them all earlier? Really, not what you think I want to hear.”

I sigh. “Because the way some of them reacted was even worse than I feared. I’ve spent my whole life since my mum died being told that I’m wrong when it comes to trusting people, for believing in the impossible. But the worst part is that, most of the time, I’ve been right. I was right about my dad being innocent. I was right about the man in the lightning that killed my mum. I was right about my first mentor as the Flash being that man. I was right about Captain Cold with all his nonchalant disregard of the law being a good person at his core and capable of being better.

“Yet my team, my friends, my family, they still doubt whenever I make a risky decision, whenever I believe in the best of a person. And it’s not just Len. It’s so many other things that when it came to him, when it came to someone I could see a future with, I couldn’t trust them enough to tell them about him. I knew how much that would hurt them, how deeply we’ve all been cut by too many betrayals, but I still chose to delay telling them as long as possible because I had lost faith in their trust in me. And it turned out I was right about that too.”

Kara hugs me. “I’m sorry, Barry. If I had known-.”

“How could anyone know if I never mentioned it?”

“Still. If we lived on the same Earth, I would’ve been there for you, even if all I knew was that you two were friends.”

“Thanks, Kara.”

She pulls back and stands up, as Len drops next to me with an armful of snacks.

“Right, I’m going to go sing,” she says. “Leave some food for me, Barry.”

Len squeezes my hand. “You alright, Scarlet?”

“Yeah.” I smile. “Just fine.”

Kara chooses Svrcina’s _Meet me on the Battlefield_ , which she nails, because she’s Supergirl and apparently, she should add supersinging to her giant list of powers.

I take the song after her, high-fiving her as we pass each other.

“If you love somebody, better tell them while they’re here ‘cause, they just may run away from you,” I sing, grinning at Len in the audience.

He and Kara start laughing when I hit the chorus and start dancing. “Cause I’m on top of the world, ‘ey.”

We take a snack break for a little bit while going over potential duets. Kara suggests _Glad You Came_ , which Len vetoes, leading to him showing her the video of me singing and dancing to it in high school. Someone else sings _Summer Nights_ making me explain the terrible karaoke night with Caitlin, at least on my end because it meant discovering that alcohol has no effect on me. Kara just grins at that, offering some alien booze she has at home, which affects even her metabolism.

“Okay, little heroes, my turn now,” Len drawls, while standing.

I double take. “I’ve never heard you sing before.”

Len smirks, trailing a hand along my back, and beckoning Kara with the other. “Be my back up?” he asks her.

She smiles and jumps to her feet. “Sure, what are we singing?”

“You’ll see.”

Len saunters over to choose the song, shoots me another Cold-smirk, and takes the next turn on stage. Kara’s stopping herself from laughing, as she stands next to him.

Then the opening music of Lion King’s _Be Prepared_ starts. And I know Len’s a master thief, but he has been robbing me of his voice all this time. I spend the entire song with my jaw slack, completely enthralled in Len singing a villain’s song. He even does the damn evil laugh at the end. Everyone in the bar claps at the end. I still can’t find it in myself to move until Len runs a finger down my cheek, under my chin, and closes my mouth.

“Well, Scarlet?”

I grab his shirt and pull him down into a hard kiss. “How could you never tell me you could sing like that before?” I ask, still holding his shirt.

Len laughs. “You know me, always another surprise up my sleeve.”

“Any other untold talents I should know about?”

He considers that for a moment. “Whether there are or not, I think I’ll keep them hidden for now.” Len loosens my grip on his shirt. “I like catching you off-guard.”

Someone laughs behind us. “You’re right, Kara. They are sickeningly adorable.”

I speed kiss Len and release his shirt, before turning around to see a woman with short dark red hair. “Alex, I’m guessing?” I say.

She nods. “Barry Allen?”

“Yep. This is my husband Len.”

I am never going to get sick of saying that.

Len holds out his hand. Alex considers it for a moment before shaking with a clearly tight grip that Len doesn’t so much as wince at.

“I work for the FBI,” she says.

“Pleasure,” Len says, lowering his voice. “But I know you’re lying. Just like I know your adoptive sister isn’t from around here.”

Alex steps closer. “I still catch criminals for a living.”

“So does Barry. Both he and Kara, who could both beat me in a fight before I could even blink if they wanted to, are fine with me, just so we’re clear.”

She relaxes and steps back. “All right, you pass. Someone on this Earth had to make sure instead of blindly trusting.”

Kara pouts while sitting down. “I didn’t blindly trust him at all. I was plenty intimidating. You tell her, Len.”

“Like an angry kitten. And it wasn’t even directed at me.”

I laugh. Kara might be the strongest person I’ve ever met, but Len’s not far off at all.

This weekend is exactly what both of us needed. Going back to Central is going to be hard, but I’ve got more people supportive of Len and me than I would’ve imagined after one week, even if the week went a lot worse than expected. I figured there’d be some grudging acceptance and mostly annoyance but not speaking about it, not… Well, I’m only not on speaking terms with one person, so it’s not completely horrible. I’m sure this coming week will be better than last.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notice that there are eight more chapters? Yeah, the coming week won’t be difficult the same way the previous was, but that doesn’t mean it’ll be easy either. 
> 
> Anyway, just in case anyone didn’t know, Len’s actor Wentworth Miller can sing just as well as Grant Gustin (Barry) and Melissa Benoist (Kara). Hope you liked that dose of fluff after the trainwreck of a week Barry had.


	12. Million Dollar CSI

First night back in Central, and I’m using my speed to do literally everything in the apartment. Len calmly texts his Rogues to make sure there’s been no sudden developments in the city. I unpack, clean the apartment, browse through cases for work, figure out the skills I’d need to make Gideon in the future, and even risk a glance at the Star Labs budget. Basically, I fill the apartment with constant streaks of lightning as I flit from task to task without slowing down to normal speed.

Len slams his phone down, jolting me to a stop.

“Was your sparring with Kara this morning not enough?” he asks.

“What do you mean?”

“You’re reading a budget, Scarlet.”

I look down at the papers in my hand and back at Len. “So?”

He shakes his head. “If you want to go on a run, just go, Barry. I really don’t care either way.”

“But this is meant to be our weekend away from all that.”

“It’s Sunday night. Weekend’s pretty much over. And if you don’t go do something to wear off that excess energy of yours right now, you’re going to be dead tired tomorrow at work from not be able to sleep later tonight.” He picks his phone back up. “Plus, I know you’re itching to check on the city.”

“I don’t _have_ to go on patrol.”

“You’re right. I can always call Iris and Lise over, so they can finally meet instead.”

I speed into my suit. “Know what? I think I’m going to run around the city for a bit.”

Len smirks. “Try not to have a bomb explode in your face this time.”         

“One time,” I grumble, before kissing Len and heading out.

*

It’s oddly peaceful to run through the city without someone giving me instructions in my ear. I’ll never stop being grateful for the team’s help but having to process their words when they talk so slowly starts to be a bit of a headache sometimes. Tonight though, it’s just me and Central City. I only slow down when dealing with muggers and the like, so I don’t hurt them too badly from whiplash, but even then, I’m still little more than a blur of red and streak of golden lightning.

That is, until I recognise a mugger’s victim. I can’t resist sticking around for more than a second, to see if he’s okay obviously, not to see whether this will change his opinion of the Flash.

Julian yanks his laptop bag back over his shoulder and glares at me. “Don’t you have a city to lord over?”

“I don’t-.” I vibrate my vocal chords. “I don’t lord of Central. Why would you think I did?”

If he either recognises my voice or notices the change, he doesn’t comment. “You mean you don’t allow certain criminals to get away just because you happen to be buddies with them? Oh, that’s right. You seem to think them helping you with your problems is reason enough to let them get away with murder.”

“I don’t let anyone get away with killing,” I snap.

“Doesn’t seem to be the case when it comes to your friend Leonard Allen.”

“Cold and I aren’t friends.”

Julian folds his arms. “Yet you’re not surprised by his name change.”

“Why would I be?”

“Suppose it’s possible you heard like everyone else did, or…”

I stop myself from asking or what. “Is there a reason you have a problem with me, Julian, or is it just because I’m capable of seeing the world in shades of grey?”

Julian’s arms drop to his sides. “You know my name?”

“You work with the meta-human taskforce. Your findings have helped me and my team stop metas before.”

“I was unaware we worked with you.”

I shrug. “The only reason Detective West knows about metas is because of me.”

“But he said Star Labs…” Julian hits the wall behind him. “Of bloody course!” He whirls at me. “I knew it was strange that you changed your voice. And why would a random lightning strike patient end up inheriting a multi-million-dollar institute anyway? Lightning on the night that accelerator went off. Oh, that explains so bloody much.”

Two options. Option one, run away and hope, hope, hope that Julian forgets about all this or hasn’t actually figured it out. Option two, make sure that under no circumstances, Julian tells anybody because it getting out that a CSI is married to Captain Cold is one thing, but the Flash? That’ll only be the start of my problems if my name gets out.

“Explains what?” I ask.

Julian rolls his eyes. “You can drop the act now, Allen. I’m not about to pull a Detective West and tell everyone.”

“Why not?” I ask, my voice back to normal.

“Because as much as I really don’t like you, especially now, I’m not a complete ass. But if I do ever finally find enough evidence to lock your husband and his team of criminals away, I won’t even hesitate. You try and interfere with that, as Flash or CSI, and I’ll get you fired and thrown into jail right alongside them.”

“So you’re not going to start telling me that I shouldn’t be married to one of my villains?”

“I can’t express how little I care. Probably helps that I’ve never thought you a hero.”

Julian walks off after that. I keep up with patrol for all of five minutes before heading home and crashing straight onto the bed. Len wanders into the bedroom and sits down next to me.

“What’s the matter, Barry?”

“Stopped someone from mugging Julian. Made the stupid decision to stick around. He figured me out.”

Len laughs. “You know you’re terrible at this secret identity thing, right?”

“Shut up,” I mumble into his pillow.

“Sorry. He going to tell anyone?”

“No.”

“Then what’s got you like this?”

“He said I wasn’t a hero.”

Len lies down, resting his head on my back. “Well, we both know that’s bullshit.”

“Still stings.”

“It doesn’t matter whether the whole city thinks the same, Scarlet. You’ll always be a hero.”

I turn my head to the side. “How can you know that?”

“Because I know you, and Julian Albert doesn’t.”   

“You can’t threaten a CSI, especially one tasked with investigating some of your known associates.”

And you, I don’t say.

Len rolls to face me. “What could possibly have given you the impression that I’d want to do that?”

“I happen to know you too.”

“Fine, but only because I wouldn’t be able to have a conversation with the guy without icing him.”

I sigh. “One night back in Central, and I already manage to end up with one more person knowing my identity. I miss Earth 38.”

“But you missed it here more.”

Len’s right, as much as I don’t want him to be. Life here might be hard right now, but it’s mine. Strangers can hate my guts all they want for being with Len. That’s their problem. I’m done letting it get to me.

*

Life’s funny. One minute you’re walking to Star Labs after a very long day at work, the next you’re resisting the urge to use your superpowers to break out of an idiot’s grip as he puts a bag over your head and knocks your unconscious. Now though, now it’s less resisting the urge to use my speed and escape the ropes tying me to a chair in an abandoned warehouse, and more resisting the urge to laugh at my pathetic kidnapper who’s trying to ransom me back to Len.

“You’re making a terrible mistake,” I say, slowly working my way through the ropes without using my speed. “Just let me go now and I’ll try to keep Len from tearing through you to whoever put you up to this.”

My kidnapper backhands me. “Shut up! I don’t work for anyone.”

I trained with Kara yesterday. This guy’s slap tickles in comparison.

“Sorry, it’s just that you keep checking your phone like you’re either waiting for further instructions, or you’re wondering why your boss hasn’t contacted you back yet. I’d say it was the latter from the small switchblade in your hoodie’s pocket that you’ve been fiddling with for the past ten minutes, indicating nerves. Your clothes also smell of beer, but you don’t appear intoxicated, so I’d say you got this job in a bar, desperate for work from someone a lot higher up on the criminal food chain than you. Meaning, whoever put you up to this, probably didn’t even meet you directly, instead had some sort of middleman contact you, offering you the opportunity of a lifetime, but really just finding someone disposable in case Len decides to ignore the million dollar ransom demand in favour of hunting you down.”

He stumbles away from me. “Are you a meta too? Some sort of telepath?”

I finally squeeze one of my hands loose from the ropes.

“I’m just a CSI who happens to be good at his job. Not to mention, I’ve been expecting something like this to happen. We even put in precautions for when it did.”

“P-precautions?”

“Oh, yes. See, if I didn’t check in every hour, Len would know something’s up.”

Not really, but I did have time to send an alert to the team before this guy knocked me out, which would’ve activated the GPS on my phone. Hopefully, Cisco and Caitlin will realise that it’s too suspicious for one of them to find me and have the forethought to contact Len.

“Why are you not more scared?” my kidnapper asks, right as I finish untying the ropes holding me to the chair completely.

“First, I’ve seen more gruesome crime scenes than you could even begin to imagine. Second, I married Captain Cold, world-renown master-thief and alleged leader of the strongest faction of criminal metas in the city. Did you really think I’d be scared of some guy in a dollar mask with a switchblade?”

Said guy pulls out the switchblade and grips it tightly. “Maybe you’re just worried that Snart isn’t coming.”

A familiar stream of blue hits the guy’s back. “The _name_ is Len Allen. And I’ll always come for what’s mine.”

“And you claim I’m bad at showing up on time,” I grumble, as my kidnapper hits the ground.

Len throws back his hood with a smirk. “Sounded like you were handling it fine.”

I let the ropes fall. “You’re not wrong.”

“And how’d you get out of those?”

“Sheer determination combined with a terrible kidnapper.”

My kidnapper stumbles to his feet, switchblade in hand. “You won’t be thinking I’m so terrible after I-.”

Len punches him and knocks him out cold.

“You got kidnapped by that?” he asks.

I stretch my legs out and stand up. “You know perfectly well how that happened.”

Len hugs me tight. “Didn’t use your powers then?” he whispers.

“Place might be bugged.”

“Have any clue who might be behind this?”

“A few. For now, should probably get back to Star Labs. They’ll be worried.”

Len pulls back. “I wasn’t worried,” he says at a normal volume.

“Uh huh.”

“I really wasn’t, Barry.”

“Sure.”

“Lisa on the other hand. She looked ready to pounce on whoever would dare hurt her brother-in-law.”

I wrap an arm around Len’s waist. “The lying, Len.”

That gets a laugh out of him.

There’s so much to worry about if whoever’s behind this doesn’t take the hint to back off, but for now, it’ll be fine. Plus, if it really comes down to it, I still have my powers behind me. I’m not about to let anybody use me against Len.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just had to have Julian figuring it out somewhere in this fic. This chapter seemed as good a spot as any.


	13. Outside Opinion

Apparently, Iris, Eddie, and Wally boycotted Saturday Night Family Dinner while I was on Earth-38. It wasn’t even a West idea, but Eddie’s. Wally came by the CCPD yesterday to make sure I was eating properly, this time of his own choice, and told me about it. I don’t know whether I was more surprised by that, or that the two detectives haven’t seemed off over the past three days. It gives me a bit of hope that maybe Joe’s finally starting to feel guilty, even if he’s been treating me like any other CSI since Monday.

Still better than the majority of the other detectives, who instead of laughing alongside me when I explained my failed kidnapping on Monday, just made comments about me getting what I deserved. Singh put those to an end with a sharp glare before demanding that I alert the CCPD if I ever find myself in a similar situation. Joe still wouldn’t meet my eye when he heard about it, which was somehow worse than Julian criticising me for taking the situation too lightly.

*

“Even if you are a bull-headed meta,” he whispers.

“Considering there’s an actual meta out there that’s a walking talking shark, I’d choose a better figure of speech. And don’t even get me started on the telepathic gorilla that used to live in the sewers.”

Julian stares at me blankly for several moments before returning to his work.

Ha. 20 - Barry Allen. 98 - Julian Albert. Never said I was winning this fight.

*

Cisco’s still not over it when I’m done patrolling for the night on Wednesday. His willingness to work with Len when the situation called for it has earned him a reduced ‘I’m mad at you right now’ sentence. The idea that Barry Allen has a bigger target on his back according to Central City’s criminals than the Flash has been seriously worrying him. Caitlin’s just as concerned, but she seems confident in my ability to handle the situation without giving away my powers like I already did.

“You don’t understand,” Cisco says. “It starts out with these sub-par kidnappers to test Cold’s response times, but then it moves on to torture, and figuring out you have powers, then connecting you to the Flash and-.”

“Cisco, it’s fine,” I assure him. “Len’s been constantly drumming into me to be careful about using my powers in public places. We both agreed that the Julian situation was because he knows me too well and is really smart.”

“Julian situation?” Caitlin asks.

Oh. I may have completely forgot to tell them.

“To be fair, I did get kidnapped between that and seeing you next.”

She sighs. “Someone else knows your identity.”

“He immediately connected Star Labs telling Joe about metas and the Flash telling him about metas to me. I didn’t immediately agree, of course, but he kept making really valid connections and called me out the second I tried to move on from the topic.” I drop my head. “Then said he couldn’t care less about the Flash marrying Captain Cold ‘cause he never thought the Flash was a hero.”

“I thought you said he was smart,” Cisco says.

“I did?”

“Not if he can’t see that you’re a hero.”

I smile. “We’re okay, then?”

“You’re the one who should be forgiving me, Barry, not the other way around.”

“I leave for two seconds and Ramon and Allen have managed to fight and make up? I don’t miss the drama of this Earth.” Harry walks into the cortex completely unannounced and crosses his arms. “Why do you all look so surprised?”

Caitlin’s the first to snap out of shock. “Harry, we didn’t know you’d be coming.”

“Why would you? I never told you I’d be here today.”

“You can’t just pop up on another Earth without a little warning, Harry,” Cisco scolds.

I raise my hand. “I kind of did with Kara though.”

Harry glances at my left hand, as I awkwardly put it down. “Oh, so Allen and Snart finally got together.”

Cisco drops his mug. “You knew?”

“That they were together, no. That they wanted to be, yes. It was obvious from how they interacted.”

Caitlin shrugs. “You’re not wrong. I just never wanted to think about why Barry kept trusting Cold so easily. I was too busy being constantly annoyed by it.”

“See,” I say. “I wasn’t actively hiding anything. You guys just couldn’t see what was right in front of you.”

Harry steals Cisco’s chair. “Also, the ring is clearly meant to represent ice and lightning. I take it you all figured it out once you saw it.”

Cisco scoffs. “It’s not meant to represent-.”

“It kind of is,” I interrupt. “Len designed it that way morning after I proposed.”

Cisco stares at my hand in blanket shock. “It totally represents ice and lightning. How could I not notice this?”

“Too busy getting mad at not knowing Barry was in a relationship,” Caitlin suggests.

“Why would you do that for?” Harry asks. “If Jesse got married without telling me she’d been dating anyone, I’d be a little angry, but at least she’d be happy. I’d take it out on her partner, no doubt, but never Jesse. Then again, I’ve already lost her once. I’m not about to push her away again.”

“Tell Joe that,” I mutter under my breath.

Harry’s eyes darken. “What has West done?”

“Outed my marriage to the entire CCPD, leading to all of Central finding out, including the person who had me kidnapped two days ago.”

“What else?”

“Convinced himself and Cisco that a meta was behind my love for Len, instead of it being genuine.”

“Well, Allen, it seems your best option here is to continue living your life without Detective West’s involvement, making sure you never look his way for approval of any kind in the workplace. Trust me, it’ll work like a charm at guilting him into seeing the error of his ways once he sees that lacking his guidance hinders you in no way. It’s been Wells family tested.”

“Thanks, Harry.”

He nods. “Now for why I’m here.” He turns to Caitlin. “Snow, a word please.”

“Me?”

“Yes, I’ve encountered a small minority of metas on my Earth whose powers weren’t caused by the particle accelerator explosion and wanted to see whether there are any consistent DNA markers that I can add to my meta detector.”

“I’d be happy to help. This way.”

They walk out of the cortex together leaving me and Cisco alone.

I shuffle my feet. “Lisa said that once you’d gotten over Len and me being together, she wants to take you out on a proper date.”

“Why are you telling me this now?” Cisco asks.

“We made a deal. She gets what she wants, and I’ll get footage of Len freaking out over our first kiss.”

Cisco sighs. “I don’t think I’ll ever like him, Barry. And it still hurts that you never mentioned it, reasons aside. But I’m pretty sure I hurt you worse that day than he has in years, so I can’t really say I disapprove of you two being a couple. That said, I can’t honestly say that I approve either, at least not yet.”

“I can work with not yet.”

“And our friendship?”

I shrug. “How’s almost there sound?”

Cisco smiles. “I can work with almost there.”

And to think, I thought it’d be hard to see Harry after he killed Zoom without hesitation all those months ago. Suppose I’ve been dealing with bigger problems lately than my moral compass and people close to me stepping all over it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kind of short, but a necessary stepping point in a handful of plot points/character progressions.


	14. Rogue and Loyal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are a number of reasons for the longer than usual wait, but instead of listing them, here's the chapter.

I stifle a yawn against Len’s pillow. Wait a moment. I pat the bed next to me. Where’s Len? I squint at his bedside table. His phone’s still there. Still home then. I roll onto my back and half-heartedly look at the closed door. No sound of cooking or the TV. There are voices though. Len’s and … some guy’s, kind of familiar, but I’m not really awake enough to figure it out. I yawn again and shove the blankets off me. The voices don’t stop, even when I fall off the bed. I stumble to my feet, open the door and yawn again.

“Mornin’, Len,” I mumble, dragging my feet to the kitchen and not looking his way. “Who’ve you got over so early?”

“It’s not early, Barry. I let you sleep in.”

I grab a couple of muffins from the fridge. “You’re the best.”

“Saying that to me or the food?”

I stuff a muffin into my mouth. “Both.”

The other person laughs. “You weren’t kidding when you said he was cute.”

“Back off, Rathaway. He’s mine.”

That makes me finally look their way. “C’mon, Len, I only just got Cisco close to normal a few days ago. You couldn’t bring over a Rogue he doesn’t have a personal history with?”

“Like he’ll ever find out.”

I trudge over to the couch. “Still makes me feel bad.”

Hartley watches me from Mick’s usual spot. I drop next to Len with my remaining muffin and rest against his shoulder.

“You know Cisco Ramon?” Hartley asks.

“I own Star Labs,” I point out between bites. “Cisco’s a friend.”

Hartley crosses his arms. “So, boss, when are you going to tell the other Rogues that you married the Flash?”

I laugh. “You think I have the time to run around saving the city? Between my fulltime job at the CCPD, which more times than not ends up with me working unpaid overtime, making sure Star Labs doesn’t drown in expenses that our patents barely cover, and trying to develop a sentient AI in my spare time, when exactly am I meant to a superhero?” I finish my muffin. “Superspeed would be a blessing in my mess of a life. But the only things I got from being struck by lightning, was months of my life disappearing between one blink and the next, and my mother’s murderer feeling just guilty enough to leave me a high-maintenance lab with a total of three employees, including me.”

“I know the Flash operates out of Star Labs,” Hartley says, like that’s proof enough.

“Congratulations, you’ve identified our biggest drain on resources. Not that I’m complaining considering it goes to protecting the city. It’s not like he’s ever stolen some of our most impressive tech.” I level a fake glare at Len, who just smirks. “But sure, think I’m a speedster if you can’t be bothered figuring out who’s really behind the mask.”

Hartley smiles. “It’s funny. If I really was just guessing, I might’ve believed you, but I’ve known who’s under the mask for years. All it took was a little hacking of Star Labs medical records clearly identifying you as a meta with superspeed who woke up from the coma right before the Flash was first theorised to have stopped the younger Mardon brother.”

I slump against Len. “I tried. You deal with it now.”

“You left me to deal with Lisa and Mick by myself.”

“Yeah, but I handled Julian early this week. It’s your turn.”

“Just how many people know the Flash’s identity?” Hartley asks.

“Too many,” Len and I answer at the same time.

Hartley laughs. “Then what’s two more?”

Len scowls. “Barry was kidnapped five days ago because of our marriage becoming public knowledge. I’m not about to risk two more people knowing his best trump card for next time.”

“And here I thought the Rogues were like family to you.”

I frown at that. “I don’t tell my family Len’s secrets. They’re his business, not theirs. Just because someone’s family, doesn’t mean they have the right to know everything that you do.”

Hartley rolls his eyes.

“I meant that family protects each other, Flash. You two come clean with Roy and Mark, and they’ll be more willing to help keep an eye out on the not so helpless CSI who needs to hide his powers from future kidnappers.”

“I’d rather just not be kidnapped,” I mutter.

“Mardon has grudges against both the Flash and Joe West. Revealing that the detective’s foster son is the former won’t be good for anyone involved,” Len says.

Hartley folds his arms. “And if he finds out from someone else first?”

“That a threat, Rathaway?” Len asks, voice cold.

“I’m not about to spill the secret, but neither Mark nor Roy are idiots. They’ll put it together eventually. Would you rather control how they find out or wait for the inevitable bomb to go off?”

Len sighs.

I squeeze his hand. “When should we tell them?” I ask.

“You can’t be serious, Scarlet.”

“My worst enemies have always known my identity, Len. They each took a parent from me. But your Rogues? They’d have to get through you, Lisa, and Mick first and they’d know it. I trust you to keep them in line.”

“You have too much faith in me, Barry.”

I shrug. “You’ve always thought that. Must suck to constantly be wrong.”

Len stands up, dislodging me. “Call a meeting for two hours from now,” he orders Hartley. “No chance you’ll back out of another of your stupid ideas, Scarlet?”

“No.”

“I’m taking my full gear then.”

I stretch on the couch. “I have beat them both before.”

“You might be able to handle yourself fine, but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t send the message to not mess with my husband regardless.”

It’s not like this will be harder than telling any of my friends.

*

This might’ve been easier if I’d worn the suit, but I thought it wouldn’t be necessary. Neither Bivolo nor Mardon have believed all of us saying that I’m the Flash. Bivolo didn’t even believe me when I explained that Joe thought he’d whammied me into loving Len. I grab everyone burgers before they can so much as blink and toss them into the middle of the warehouse. I cross my arms.

“Believe me now?”

“Was hoping you were all pranking us,” Mardon mutters.

“About your brother-.”

“Save it, Flash.”

I hang my head. “It wasn’t my choice. If I’d known Joe was going to… I’ve made a lot of mistakes. Letting him die and the meta prison in the pipeline were two of my biggest. He needed psychological help not a bullet.”

Mardon clenches his fists. “He didn’t need help from the likes of you.”

“It’s not like you were there when he needed you,” Lisa points out. “Least Barry tried to make him see reason.”

“You didn’t do the same for your brother when he obviously lost his mind and married both a badge and the Flash,” Mardon spits.

Lisa charges her gun.

“Drop it, Lise,” Len says. “If you’ve got a problem with this, Mardon, you’re more than welcome to leave. I won’t kill you to keep the secret, but if I _ever_ hear word that any of my Rogues, ex or not, told someone the Flash’s identity, I will hunt them down and make sure they never feel the warmth of the sun again. Are we clear?”  
Hartley scoffs. “You expect us to believe that your precious boy-scout will let you follow through on that?”

“Len won’t kill you, and he won’t be caught by my colleagues. Anything outside of that…” I trail off and shrug. “He’s his own person. I trust him to do whatever he thinks is necessary.”

Within reason, but saying that won’t help with the whole threat thing.

Mick grabs a burger bag and drops onto one of the fold out chairs. “We going to talk about the ransom or not?” he asks.

“Ransom?” Bivolo repeats. “What ransom?”

I sigh, grabbing a couple of bags for myself. “Some idiot tried kidnapping me five days ago to ransom me back to Len. Mick wanted the Rogues to take turns intimidating potential hirers. I’m pretty sure he just wants to burn some buildings down.”

“For once, I agree with his urge,” Len mutters, accepting the single burger I spare him.

“So now you want us to not only play nice with the Flash, but also help him?” Mardon asks.

“A move against Lenny is a move against all of us,” Lisa points out.

Bivolo inspects his own burger. “But wouldn’t this lead into us helping the Flash more often?”

“I mean, maybe you can all help out when the entire world’s at stake,” I say. “It’d be a lot easier to get you pardons if that was the case.”

“And what could be so bad that you’d need all the Rogues, Scarlet?”

“I don’t know. Maybe aliens attacking Central City.”

“Aliens,” Len deadpans.

“We literally went to another Earth to visit my alien friend for our honeymoon, Len. Don’t get snarky with me.”

“That was our honeymoon?”

“It was our first trip post-marriage. I’m pretty sure it counts.”

“We slept on Supergirl’s sofa.”

“It was a comfy sofa.”

“Honeymoons don’t usually involve sleeping on the sofa of your friend who has both x-ray vision and superhearing.”

“Well, superheroes don’t usually marry their favourite villains, but here we are.”

“Are they always like this?” Hartley asks.

“Yes,” Lisa and Mick say at the same time.

“And his foster father thought my powers could somehow fake this?” Bivolo asks.

I hold up a hand. “Don’t even go there right now. I felt the need to go to a parallel universe just to get away from that whole problem.”

“To visit your alien friend from another Earth,” Hartley clarifies.

“Well, no. She’s not from that Earth. She’s from a different planet all together. She just happens to live on Earth.”

“In another universe,” Hartley says.

“Yep. I first met her after trying to up my speed to fight a speedster from a different Earth. Not Supergirl’s Earth. Her Earth is Earth 38. Zoom was from Earth 2.”

“This is why I hate heroes,” Mick grumbles.

I frown. “C’mon, Mick. I thought we were friends. I even used that as an argument against the Arrow to back the hell off.”

“Don’t even try escaping once he calls you a friend,” Len says. “It’s about as likely as Barry joining the Rogues.”

“I’m not whipped like you, Snart,” Mick says.

I share a small smile with Len. “You know, I have a friend who can set himself on fire. Having me as a mutual friend would help if you wanted to meet him.”

“I’m listening.”

“Also that friend Supergirl, she pretty much shoots lasers from her eyes.”

“I’m sold.”

Lisa laughs. “Now who’s whipped?”

“Did you want that date with Cisco or not?” I ask.

“That was part of a deal.”

“Which you haven’t delivered on,” I retort.

Len sighs. “You’re not going to tell me what the deal was about, are you?”

I scoff. “No. You’d just try to stop Lisa.”

“I’m starting to see how you can marry both a badge and the Flash,” Bivolo says.

“And he isn’t about to try and get us to play heroes?” Mardon asks.

I wave him off. “Like I said, world disasters, I’ll ask for a hand. Otherwise, I’m going to keep trying to stop your heists and the like.”

“But Snart’s helped you out on metas that aren’t world disaster level.”

“Yeah, but he’s my husband. The rules are different for him. Mainly because Len prefers having my back when I need the help.”

“Or that you’re incapable of thinking ahead in a fight,” Len mutters.

“That too. I am getting better though.”

“Still worlds behind me in planning, Scarlet.”

“Eh, you take the slow route for both of us.”

“Cold’s constant flirting with the Flash makes sense now,” Mardon mutters.

Lisa grins. “Let me tell you all about Frozen.”

“Oh, I forgot to mention the Lion King thing,” I realise.

Len glares at me. “Don’t you dare.”

“What? Is it going to ruin your whole ‘I’m a cold-hearted thief’ thing?”

“I _am_ a cold-hearted thief.”

I roll my eyes. “Sure, Len. Whatever you say.”

Nobody’s attacked anyone and nobody’s stormed out, so I guess the Rogues can handle the Flash and Captain Cold being married better than my team can. I both don’t and do look forward to telling Team Flash that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Figured I’d toss in a reference to that year’s crossover, even if this fic doesn’t quite get there timeline wise.


	15. Frost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Miss me?

Caitlin’s been acting off recently. First, I thought she was avoiding me because of the whole Len thing, but then Cisco made a comment about her not being around as much.

“She’s allowed her secrets,” I point out. “We can just ask if she’s feeling okay. That’s it. No more Team Flash Interventions.”

“Who’s holding interventions?” Caitlin asks, walking in with her head down, focussed on a tablet in her hand.

“No-one,” Cisco squeaks.

Caitlin glances between us. “Barry, what’s going on?”

“I just told Cisco we’re not holding anymore interventions,” I explain.

She frowns at Cisco. “You were thinking about holding an intervention for me?”

Cisco looks like he’s considering opening a breach right there and running away, so I answer for him.

“I thought you were avoiding me. Cisco was assuring me otherwise.”

Something a little like guilt crosses both their faces, but I don’t mention it. Honestly, after I told them how the Rogues took their boss marrying the Flash, I’m pretty sure they’ve both been avoiding me a little. Trouble is, I can’t decide whether it’s been a relief or not. At least it meant less chance of being lectured at or drawn into a repetitive argument.

Caitlin sighs and sits down. “I’ve been avoiding everyone,” she admits, “and it’s not a Coldflash thing either.”

“Coldflash?” Cisco questions, while I internally groan at Caitlin coming up with the same name Lisa did.

They can’t be talking to each other about this, right? It’s just a coincidence.

“Barry and Len,” Caitlin explains. “I just figured that whole situation needed a codename, so I squashed their aliases together.”

Cisco gets his thinking-about-codenames expression, so I rush to get Caitlin back on topic.

“You’ve been avoiding everyone?” I prompt.

 She frowns at me but drops the topic anyway. “Remember how Harry asked for my help with identifying metas not affected by dark matter?”

“Yeah,” I say.

“We were testing known non-metas to cross-reference results, and it’s always easier to just use who you happen to have on hand, but when we analysed my DNA…”

“Cait…” Cisco starts.

“I’m not infected with dark matter.”

“But you are a meta, aren’t you, Cait?” I ask.

“I’m not her,” Caitlin blurts out. “I just wanted to say that. I’m not her, even if…”

Cisco chokes on air. “You’ve got Killer Frost’s powers, don’t you?”

Caitlin flinches. “Don’t call it that. _Please_. Don’t call my condition that.”

“Condition?” I question. “Having powers isn’t a condition, Caitlin.”

“Well, I don’t know what I’m meant to do about it!” she snaps. “I just woke up one day and suddenly there’s a white streak in my hair, and the things I touch start having frost on them, and I can’t be like _her_. I’m not some murderer. I’m just me. I’m meant to be the normal one.”

Cisco steps back. “Are you saying that we’re what, freaks, for being metas?” he asks.

I shake my head. “I’m sure she didn’t mean it like that, Cisco. It’s okay to be scared over this. Remember that feeling of being overwhelmed when your powers started up?”

Caitlin snorts derisively. “What would you know about that, Barry? You were ecstatic over your powers. You don’t know what it’s like to lose control and be terrified you’re going to hurt the ones you care about if you so much as enter the same room as them.”

She’s scared and lashing out. She’s scared and lashing out. She’s scared and-.

“She’s not wrong there, Barr,” Cisco says, and I really, really thought he was done acting like this.

“The night Joe managed to convince you two that Bivolo was controlling me,” I say. “Remember that? I had a bomb explode in my face not an hour before you confronted me with an intervention that caused me to have a panic attack. Don’t know if you managed to notice, but my powers, they don’t work too well in those kinds of situations. In fact, the only reason I managed to not accidentally hurt Joe from phasing right through him is because Len showed up when he did. So, yeah, I actually do know a thing or two about being terrified of my powers. And it’s not an uncommon thing either.

“Did you know that I regularly have nightmares? They got so bad after Zoom broke my back that I was lucky to get two hours sleep a night. Then, after he ‘killed’ Jay, I would end up screaming in my sleep, begging for him to spare the ones I loved. Len would have to calm me down, despite me still being deep in the nightmare, and hold me while I cried in my sleep. Every single time I woke up from one of those, the first thing I did was make sure he was okay. Not because I thought Zoom had gotten him, but because I was petrified that I’d managed to use my powers in my sleep and hurt him, petrified that this time I had closed those final millimetres and managed to break his nose or cracked one of his ribs in my thrashing.

“I get it. Okay? I get that you’re scared, especially because another Earth’s Caitlin Snow showed she had the capacity for evil. But she’s not you. She didn’t have us. And most importantly, she didn’t have your goodness, Cait. You’ll make it through this, and we’ll help in any way that we can. Frightened lashing out or not.”

Caitlin’s anger drains. “I’m sorry, Barry. I should’ve remembered your panic attack from last week. And I definitely should’ve noticed you were having nightmares.”

I shrug. “Kept them from Len for months, and he’s always manages to spot when I’m deflecting.” Even if it’s after the fact. “Hey, maybe he’d be better help with your powers. He is technically more experienced with helping people learn to adapt to their powers, especially emotion-driven ones. And he’s the best expert in the city on cryo-tech. I mean, I’d get if you didn’t want to trust him with this, and I won’t tell him if you don’t want me to. It’s your secret, so it’s your choice who and who doesn’t know. I just figured Len’s an option.”

Cisco’s hands twist together like he’s practically bursting with reasons why that’s a terrible idea, but I just can’t handle him right now. Not after… No. Just no. Caitlin was lashing out, but Cisco? He doesn’t have an excuse. Ignorance is one thing. Not trusting in your best friend is another.

“Okay,” Caitlin says, surprising everyone in the room, including herself from her almost affronted expression. “But he’s only here to consult.”

“I’ll text him.”

And if that gives me an excuse to not look at Cisco, well, Iris has been drumming into me that I don’t have to be the one to compromise all the time.

*

Half an hour later, Len greets me with a kiss, and a barely-there frown when my smile comes up a little too forced. I shake my head before he can ask and lead him into the cortex where Caitlin and Cisco are waiting, the former looking almost as tense as she was before she snapper earlier, and the latter scowling with his arms crossed.

Len pointedly draws his gun and places it on the floor between the four of us. “I am actually here to help,” he says. “If you want me to leave, by all means, I will. But if you want to learn how to control those ice powers of yours, then you’ll stop acting like I’m here to kill you.”

Cisco narrows his eyes.

“I’m the one who needs him here,” Caitlin points out. “I don’t want you two fighting while I’m trying to control my powers.”

“Go patrol with Scarlet or something,” Len suggests.

I can’t help thinking again back to what Cisco said earlier. Spending time alone with my best friend suddenly doesn’t seem appealing.

“Actually, I think I’m going to go work on Gideon for a bit,” I say. “Had this idea at work today that I’ve been wanting to try out.”

Len frowns like he knows something’s up, but he doesn’t want to say anything given the company. “Well,” he drawls. “I’m sure the good doctor would like some portable cryogenic suppressors for when her powers are getting particularly out of control. Is that something you can come up with, Ramon, or do you need my help?”

I speed kiss Len as a silent thank you, and head out of the cortex while Cisco protests the idea of ever needing Leonard Snart’s help on anything. Really figured that by now my _best friend_ would’ve started using my husband’s correct name, but I guess no matter how much Cisco says he’s dealing with it, he still hasn’t moved past the issue at all. Len’s bound to bring this up when we go home. I just hope telling him about it doesn’t make him any less inclined to help Caitlin out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had absolutely no intention of being away for as long as I was, and as an apology, I'm following up on an idea that a comment inspired on the previous chapter. If you have any suggestions for moments during both Exceptions and Inevitable (such as Lisa and Mick's reaction to Barry being the Flash, as per Marshrose's suggestion) that you'd like to see from another character's perspective, feel free to suggest them in the comments. I'll post the different POV one-shots in a third part of Ignoring the Hero's Handbook after Inevitable's finished, so you'll have a little over a month (hopefully, my updates can be weekly) to come up with suggestions.


	16. Nothing New

It takes me until I remember to stop for lunch two hours late to realise that Julian never came in today. I think I vaguely remember him mentioning that he was coming down with something, but most of what he says that isn’t work related goes through one ear and out the other, especially when he’s voice takes a very specific tone that he only uses when complaining, usually about me. The silence is nice. Passive aggressive colleague or not, I definitely prefer working alone on this part of the job. Working theories off others is good and all, but the work to get to those theories is easier to do without any distractions.

As if reading my mind, and purposely disregarding my wishes, two patrol officers walk into the lab, their boots unnecessarily loud against the floor. I glance up from the test I’m running and immediately dismiss them. They’re looking at Julian’s desk. Probably trying to attribute something mildly complicated to a meta. Wouldn’t be the first time from these two. Thankfully, Singh doesn’t accept it as a blanket excuse for not catching a criminal. My phone buzzes with a text that I ignore until I’ve finished analysing the test’s results. I glance down at the text from Len and can’t help a small smile.

_‘Managed a civil conversation with Caitlin after training today. Tell you about it over date night.’_

I go to text something back, but the sharp click of the door locking makes me glance up. One of the officers, Henderson I think his name was, is standing next to the door, hand casually resting on his holstered gun. His partner, Andrews, is leaning against Julian’s desk, her sharp glare directed my way. I internally sigh at their attempt of intimidation. This is hardly the most worrying scene I’ve been in since Joe outed my marriage to the precinct. I’ve considered setting up cameras in here as a deterrent, but I don’t want to be cornered anywhere else.

At least I have space to move around in here.

I pointedly pause my work and push my chair back from my desk. “Was there something you needed, officers?” I ask.

“You’re Cold’s bitch,” Henderson says.

“If you’re referring to one Captain Cold, Leonard Allen, and my husband, then I’m sad to inform you that he doesn’t have a dog. See, Len prefers huskies, and our apartment isn’t anywhere near big enough for one. That said, he’s more of a cat person. We decided that when we eventually do get a pet, it’ll be just the one, and it’ll probably be a cat called Snowflake.”

Because Len literally cannot resist the ice-related puns.

“What the hell’s wrong with you, Allen?” Andrew snaps. “First you marry a guy who terrorises our city, and now you’re picking out cat names?”

“I hadn’t realised I had to justify my life choices to everyone who works in the same building as me,” I say lightly, faking a polite smile that Oliver would be proud of. “Considering our captain is perfectly fine with my marriage, I don’t see how you two have any authority on the matter. In fact, this is the longest conversation I’ve had with either of you. My personal matters don’t affect your lives, so back off before I file a complaint with Internal Affairs for harassment.”

“You threatening us, Allen?” Henderson asks. “Because that sounded awfully like a threat. Your _husband_ ,” he spits, “teach you how to do that? Or have you been two-faced scum all along, working for Cold?”

Andrews suddenly shifts off Julian’s desk, storming up to mine, her face twisted into the sort of fury I’ve only seen as the Flash. “You don’t deserve the badge, you-.”

Someone bangs on the door.

Andrews shifts slightly in her final step and casually leans against my desk, back to me, but gun unholstered and not-so-casually sitting on my desk, barrel facing me, her hand resting on top of it. The safety’s off. I have to force myself to not let the speed force rise up in my veins, lest the too obvious lightning appears in my eyes. Henderson unlocks the door with a series of cursing.

“Damn thing jammed,” he explains on opening it.

The person who walks in doesn’t look like he believes a word of it, automatically looking to me to make sure I’m alright. And the person who follows him looks like his worst nightmare just came true, guilt in the eyes that refuse to so much as glance my way.

“Detectives West and Thawne,” Andrews greets with a carefree smile. “What are you doing up here?”

I glance at the gun still facing my way, and then back at Eddie.

“Julian’s not in,” I say. Leave while you can, I want to say.

But I don’t want them to turn away right now. Even if I could technically handle this situation by myself, I shouldn’t have to. Not as Barry Allen. Not in a place I’m meant to be safe in. Not from two people who should be out patrolling the streets for criminals right now instead of trying to become ones because of how much they hate the man I married.

“There a problem here?” Joe asks, and really, there’s a time and a place to suddenly be concerned over my wellbeing again, especially with that level of tactlessness.

“Just discussing cat names,” Henderson says with a laugh. “Allen here wants one named Snowflake.”

I force a smile. “That’s all Len. I was more partial to Elsa myself.”

“Not Frosty?” Eddie asks, stepping closer to my desk and saying our set codeword for when there’s trouble, and I can’t use my powers.

“Not even Len would let us name our future cat Frosty,” I confirm.

And of all the situations we’ve tested to fit that word in, this has got to be one of the easiest.

But then I notice the gun again and any of my relief fades.

Eddie’s expression says, ‘we’ll get you out of this, Barry’, but Andrews is blocking his sight of the gun with her body, and for all Eddie knows, I keep glancing at my phone, which has taken to buzzing with another message.

“Wonder who’s texting you, Allen,” Andrews says.

I reach for my phone. “Probably just a wrong number.”

Andrews snatches my phone before I can. She glares at the snowflake charm like her distaste could somehow melt it, but when she looks up, a wide smile is plastered on her face.

“Whose idea was the charm?”

“Mine,” I admit. “Len’s got a beaker on his phone. They were meant to be friendship charms, but I couldn’t find the right ones until the day we started dating.”

“ _Cute_ ,” she says, like it’s anything but.

I shrug and take my phone back. “Len thinks so.”

I glance down at my screen and realise the reason for Andrews’s smile.

_‘Change of plans. I’m picking you up early.’_

If Andrews is smiling over that, then she and Henderson were probably planning to draw Len here. I could tip Len off, and avoid any firefight in the precinct, but he’d just end up coming with reinforcements. And nobody wants all of the Rogues storming the CCPD. The best person to come here without drawing the wrong kind of suspicion would be Cisco as Vibe. I should set off my phone’s alert. I should get his help. I should…

“Captain Singh,” I greet loudly.

Andrews automatically turns around, even as Henderson calls my bluff, but the former’s hand leaves her gun long enough for me to knock it under my desk. Joe has his sidearm aimed at Henderson before he can draw his, and Eddie crosses the rest of the lab, his gun aimed at Andrews. I make a point of dragging Andrews’s weapon behind me with my shoe.

“I think we can all agree that this won’t be happening again,” Eddie says. “The word of two detectives and a lead CSI against two patrol officers. It’s obvious who would be believed in an Internal Affairs case.”

“We find out you’re harassing or threatening Barry again, and you can say goodbye to your badges,” Joe says.

Henderson scoffs. “Allen should be the one handing in his badge. He doesn’t deserve it. And the citizens of Central City don’t deserve to have some supervillain’s plaything working for the police. It’s wrong, and everyone here knows it.”

“Why are you even defending him, West?” Andrews asks. “We all heard what you said. You agree with us. Allen crossed a line. He forfeited his right to be here the moment he chose Cold. If it’s not us who drive him out of here, then someone else will. And it’ll be exactly what that traitor to the badge deserves.”

There’s something a little too sharp in Andrews expression, a little too tense in the way Henderson is holding himself. It’s something I expected to come up, but I hadn’t realised it’d be these two.

“What did Len do to you?” I ask, ignoring their surprise. “You’re hardly the first to threaten me.” I huff out a laugh. “You’re not even the first cops to threaten me today. I had some junior detectives in here when I arrived this morning. They thankfully lost their nerve before it came to drawing their weapons though. I’m pretty sure they just wanted a chance to yell at someone about this because they couldn’t understand how Len and I work. But you two, you came in here ready to follow through on your threats. And you want Len to come here and see me at your mercy. Chances are, he’s done something to affect you two directly, and you wanted payback through an easy target.”

I know exactly what kind of person I married, and I’m not going to be used against him. But I don’t have to say that. I shouldn’t have to say that. And I’m definitely not doing these two the curtesy of spelling it out for them. They came in into _my_ lab and threatened _me_. Regardless of motive, they’re in the wrong here, not me. I’m not responsible for Len’s past and vice versa. And I know that he hasn’t killed or significantly harmed anyone except his father since our deal.

I trust him.

“We don’t need a reason to hate a crime lord,” Henderson snaps.

“Len’s no crime lord. He’s got his Rogues, sure, but they’re more like family. I’m not saying they’re good people, but they had less of a problem with Len marrying a badge than the majority of this precinct has had with me marrying a thief.”

“He’s a supervillain!” Andrews shouts. “He doesn’t steal because he needs money. He does it because it’s a game to him. That’s all Cold does. Play games. He treats anyone with a badge like they’re enemy pawns to be swept aside when he’s bored. That monster should have a shoot on sight order, not a pardon for tricking the Flash into thinking that he was any sort of help.”

“What if he really did help the Flash?” Joe asks. “What if Sn- _Cold_ helped save everyone in this city? I’m not saying we should forgive the thief, or that he’s a good person. He’s never going to stop being a criminal, not because he doesn’t have the capacity to do better, but because you’re right; Leonard S- Allen does it for the thrill. He can play the hero when it benefits him all he wants. Who he is at he core, that’s never going to change. But taking out Cold’s actions on Barry? A man who has a capacity for forgiveness so big that he married Captain Cold out of love instead of some need to change him? You go after Barry, then you’re not as bad as Cold. You’re worse.”

Henderson clenches his jaw, turns on his heel and storms out of my lab. Andrews steps towards the door like she’s unsure whether to follow, but with a glance around the room, seems to realise that both Eddie and Joe’s guns are trained on her now, and she doesn’t have her weapon anymore. She throws a final glare at me and leaves with a passing whisper to Joe. The detective just looks more pissed off then anything and mutters a ‘good riddance’ when Andrews slams the door closed behind her.

I let out a breath of air and slump in my chair. “Thank you, both of you. Joe slightly less considering you did insult my husband, but at least you’re accepting that we love each other. That’s…” I sigh. “That’s something, I guess.”

“Is this kind of thing really normal, Barry?” Eddie asks.

I shrug and kick Andrews’s gun across the room. “To that level, not really. I mean the whole being kidnapped thing kind of came close, but that guy was less threatening. Being cornered somewhere in the precinct though? Yeah, nothing new. It’s tapered off a little bit, but at least once a day someone has something to say, or just shoves me in the hallways. I knew this was going to happen when everyone found out, just thought I’d have more time post-marriage before it started. Some time to make sure everyone important knew from me first, you know?” I realise who I’m talking to and shake my head. “Or I guess you don’t know, Joe.”

Joe grimaces. “If you had said something-.”

“I hurt you,” I interrupt, pulling up my next test. “Not saying anything about Len hurt a lot of the people that I care about. I know that. And I’ve been apologising for it ever since I put this ring on. I gave my reasons to whoever is willing to listen and accepted when they needed some time to deal with it. But the thing is, Joe, what you did was so much worse than keep a marriage secret.” You made me so terrified of telling you that I kept my relationship with Len a secret from everyone. And then you reacted exactly how I feared you would. But I’m not ready to have that conversation right now. Not after just having a gun pointed at my face _in_ _my lab_. “When you’re ready to admit that, we can talk. Until then, well, I have work to finish off before Len gets here.”

Eddie picks up Andrews’s gun and sighs. “C’mon, Joe. We should talk to the captain about how bad it’s been getting.”

“I _am_ sorry for shouting it out in the middle of the precinct, Barr,” Joe says. “I didn’t know anyone would try targeting you for this.”

I clench my jaw. “You couldn’t have said that after I got kidnapped thanks to the entire city knowing because of you? Or, let me guess, you thought that was some elaborate ploy Len crafted to make me more dependent on him?”         

Joe doesn’t say anything. I pretend the burn in my eyes is from staring at my screen.

“Be sure to drop off my school awards tomorrow morning,” I say, feigning indifference. “Len wanted to hunt down a copy, but I figured it’s easier to get the originals.”

“You could always pick them up yourself, Barry. I know you were out of town last Saturday, but-.”

“I’m not stepping foot back into your house without my husband by my side. I’d say your son-in-law should be welcome in your home, but I’m not sure you remember that family’s family even when they’re inconveniencing you.” I look away from my screen. “Funny, ‘cause I could’ve sworn that you were the one who taught me that.”

After that, nobody really has anything left to say, and the two detectives leave, Eddie with an awkward goodbye, and Joe with silence. I want to be able to say that all of this is because I didn’t say anything about being with Len, but truth is, I’m pretty sure it would’ve been just as bad, if not worse if I had been upfront about it. And I really don’t think I could’ve handled both Len and everyone else in my life doubting our relationship at the same time. Add on the mess with Zoom and I would’ve crumbled under the stress.

If only I could get Joe to understand that. And Cisco… I honestly don’t even know with him right now. I miss my best friend. I’m just not sure where he’s gone.

Len saunters into my lab five minutes later with an air of amusement that only comes from tormenting CCPD’s finest.

“You stay right there,” I tell him. “I need to finish this before I’m done for the day.”

Len smirks. “But Albert’s desk is only a few feet away, and I’m just an impulsive criminal. You can’t expect me to not sneak a peek.”

I roll my eyes. “We both know that I’m the impulsive one in the relationship. And that if you even think about going near Julian’s desk, he’ll somehow know, and then I’ll be the one who has to put up with his ranting.”

Len crosses his arms and leans against the wall next to the door. “Everything important is locked up, isn’t it?”

“Yup.”

“And even I can’t unlock a desk from this distance.”

“Julian considered painting a line on the floor of where you are and aren’t allowed within this lab.”

“A thin passage from the door to your desk?”

I double check the results and send them through. “A bright red line across the doorway.”

“Hilarious,” Len deadpans.

I shrug. “He wasn’t kidding. Pretty sure the only reason he didn’t was because he couldn’t convince me to pay for the paint. I didn’t think it was worth it ‘cause you’d just ignore the boundary anyway.”

“Your loyalty knows no bounds, Scarlet.”

I pack up my stuff. “Think we could stay in tonight?”

“That was the plan.”

I pause. “Then why’d you come early?”

“Figured you could use a proper break before heading over to Star Labs tonight.”

“This have something to do with that civil conversation of yours with Caitlin?” I ask, decidedly not looking at Len while I throw my jacket on.

“She might’ve mentioned something about a certain argument that happened yesterday. You never did tell me last night what Ramon did to have you practically running out of that cortex.” Len uncrosses his arms. “You need to talk about it, Scarlet?”

“Yes. No. Probably. But I really don’t want to.”

“Want to head home, bake a bunch of cookies, build a blanket fort, and see if you’re up to it then? If not, we can do all that and just relax. We could talk about our days and cuddle. You know, normal coupley stuff.”

Len frowns like he’s just agreed to have another Disney movie marathon.

I can’t help smiling. “You could probably try saying that last bit without pulling the face.”

“Got you to smile though,” Len points out.

“You always do.” I sigh. “Alright, but no using the cold gun on the blanket fort. We’ll hold it up the old fashion way: random objects from around the apartment and a whole lot of luck.”

“Didn’t you already know, Scarlet? I’m the luckiest man in town.”

I roll my eyes. “You’re terrible.”

“After all, I managed to get away with stealing your heart.”

“I’m demanding muffins as well.”

“Anything my Scarlet wants.”

I grin. “I’m glad I accidentally visited you that day.”

“I think the way we were heading, we were inevitable, whether you visited me that day or not.” Len smiles with a shrug. “But you certainly sped things up.”

I half laugh and half groan at the pun. “Let’s go home. I’m getting hungry thinking about those cookies and muffins.”

“There’s an apple pie in the fridge,” Len says.

“I love you.”

“Think I could get away with bribing the Flash with food too?” Len asks, smirking.

I pretend to consider it for a moment. “Caitlin might actually quit.”

“Shame, I was just starting to dislike her less.”

“We’re in agreeance that her, Iris, Felicity, and Lisa are never allowed to team up, right?” I ask. “Because I’m pretty sure they’d end up planning an actual wedding ceremony despite us already being married. And if you add Kara to that equation she’d literally strongarm us into doing it.”

“I’ll start the plan to keep them indefinitely separated.”

“After the blanket fort.”

“After the blanket fort,” Len agrees.

It doesn’t matter how many people believe I’m somehow betraying my badge by being with Len. The people who matter don’t care, and the people who care don’t matter. Well, most of them, at least. Joe and Cisco… They’ll come around. They just need time. They won’t keep this up forever. They can’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now I keep thinking about Len and Barry getting a pitch black kitten named Snowflake (because as if either of them would go with the expected white cat option), but that isn't something that'll work in the final three chapters. Maybe I can have it be the final chapter in 'Moments', which will be the third and final part of Ignoring the Hero Handbook, and a collection of moments throughout Exceptions and Inevitable from different characters' perspectives. Feel free to suggest any moments you'd like to see in the comments.


	17. Family

It doesn’t happen often, though according to Len that’s because even asleep it’s hard to miss the weight of a speedster lying on top of him, but some nights it’s not my nightmares that wake us up. It’s Len’s. They’ve been getting more frequent since the day I was kidnapped, and after what could’ve happened at the precinct today if Joe and Eddie hadn’t come when they had, I’m certain Len will have a nightmare again tonight. Not that I’ll be able to tell until it wakes him up. I can’t manage to fall asleep at all, even in the blanket fort that covers our entire apartment except the bedroom and bathroom, though there’s a half-hazard tunnel to access the latter.

So I lay awake, thinking over security measures that I can set up in the lab that aren’t an invasion of privacy for me or Julian because I can’t do that to anyone, not after Eobard Thawne. I almost consider setting up a panic button, but I’m not sure who it would alert. Oliver’s too far away, alerting Len would just show that whoever wants to get to him should go through me, and Cisco… It turns out I don’t trust him as much as I thought I did. I know I should’ve set off the alert to Star Labs on my phone today, and what I did do could’ve ended very badly, but in that moment, I just wasn’t sure that Cisco would even show up.

And if that isn’t a sign of how bad things have gotten, I don’t know what is.

Len and I never did get past the talking about our days bit of the plan, though this time I wasn’t purposely avoiding the conversation about Cisco. I was a little too busy restraining Len, so he wouldn’t hunt down Officers Henderson and Andrews. It turns out that Len remembers the two of them, but it wasn’t him that killed their fellow officer, and close friend, a few years back. It was Lewis. Threatening to kill me because of Len was one thing, but because of his father? I was two seconds away from calling Lisa for backup in calming Len down before I realised that she’d probably end up going after the officers herself.

The only reason Len stayed was because I admitted that I’d have to go after him as the Flash, and if I see those two so soon, it’ll end up being Len who’ll be restraining me, not the other way around. I want to say that I’m better than that, yet it’ll still be a couple of days before I can look at Henderson or Andrews without flinching. I may be able to dodge a bullet, but there’s a difference between doing that when I’m wearing the Flash suit to and having to when I’m in the lab that I’ve worked in for years.

I’m meant to be safe there.

I shouldn’t be threatened by my colleagues with a gun, _which had the safety off_ , and I shouldn’t have to worry about dodging a bullet almost point blank without revealing my identity. That shouldn’t be happening to Barry Allen. And I don’t blame Len for it. I can’t blame Len for it, even though I know certain people, like Joe, would in a heartbeat. I knew the risks long before anybody knew about our relationship. Hell, Len himself brought them up back when he was still doing those problem a day texts. I just didn’t expect to be threatened by my own colleagues. Not in the middle of the day. And certainly not in my own lab.

The last time I was hurt there, I was in a coma for months. Maybe that’s another reason I can’t seem to fall asleep. I’m sure it’s nothing at all to do with the sight of the gun every time I close my eyes. Or the resolve in Henderson and Andrews’s eyes. Or the niggling idea that if just Joe had come up, then maybe he would’ve simply left instead of standing up for me. But I know he wouldn’t. I know he’s at least a little guilty over it. I know that. Too bad fear is rarely logical.

“Barry?” Len murmurs.

I tighten my hold on him. “I’m here. Not going anywhere, Len. Promise.”

“I was too late. You-,” Len’s breath stutters. “It was so real.”

“Do you want me to get some light in here?” I ask.

“No, please stay. Can you…? Can you keep talking? Tell me about your progress on Gideon or something else sciencey that makes you sound like a huge nerd. Just, I really need to hear that patented Barry Allen adorableness right now.”

“Well, I hit a bit of a roadblock with Gideon, so nothing new there, but there was this new study done on AIs and their rate of development since the concept was first properly studied back in 1956, which really sparked my interest. I think that with the recent surge of specialists within the field, I could maybe officially expand Star Labs to include it as a research division. Of course, any ‘proper’ Star Labs operations will have to be kept completely separate from the superhero side of things, which I’m thinking I’ll classify as private senior research labs for Cait, Cisco, and me. We’d have to implement some serious security measures to ensure that any Flash business doesn’t hurt the Star Labs employees, but I reckon that with your help, that part will be pretty easy.”

“I’d be your security consultant,” Len jokes.

“You’d be the best security consultant Central City has to offer,” I agree. “Anyway, I know that I’m meant to be Gideon’s official creator, and all that, but I don’t see why that has to mean I need to do it by myself, and it’s not like I’ve been following what was laid out for the future anyway. But I do really want to build Gideon, because the idea of something so beautifully complex existing is already awesome enough, but me, Barry Allen, creating it? That’d be a dream come true. That said, I know that it’s not exactly my area of expertise, and even if I spend hours upon hours researching, it’d be a lot easier if I had some experts in the field to work with. I’d honestly be happy just being a contributor to Gideon. I don’t have to be her official creator.”

“I’m sure you’ll manage it anyway.”

“I kind of wish that your talent with cryogenic-engineering crossed over to computational-engineering, so that we could work on her together.”

“I _am_ self-taught, Scarlet. Maybe if you show me what needs to be physically built, I’ll be able to figure it out.”

I smile. “Really?”

“If it means getting to listen to you talk science and tech all day, then sure.”

“We could go to Star Labs right now,” I say, pausing to yawn. “My private lab there has a bunch of equipment that would help you establish a foun-founda-,” I yawn again, “foundational understanding of…” I bury the next yawn against Len’s chest. “Computer architecture,” I finish with another yawn.

“You didn’t go to sleep, did you, Scarlet?” Len asks.

I yawn again. “I tried.”

“Worried about nightmares?”

“Yeah,” I mumble.

“How about you try to at least nap, and I’ll wake you up if you start getting restless?”

“But you need sleep too,” I point out, yawning again.

And it’s not fair that Len can snap me out of nightmares before they start, but I have to wait until his wake him up to be able to do anything. Len and Lisa taught themselves to sleep silently because of their father, and it’s too late for either of them to unlearn the habit.

Len kisses me gently. “We can take shifts then. You already took the first one, so I’ll take this one.”

“Okay, that makes sense.”

Len mumbles something about adorable speedsters as I close my eyes, but I can’t quite make it out. He’s probably being a mean pillow and teasing me again. Not that I can bring myself to care as I finally fall asleep.

*

“He ended up staying up almost all night after what happened yesterday. I’ve only just gotten him to fall asleep two hours ago… Right, will that count as sick leave, or… Thank you, David. I’ll be sure to pass that on. About Officers Henderson and Andrews… That’s good to hear. Barry could definitely use the good news. Delightful chat as always.”

“Len?” I mumble.

He kisses my temple. “Go back to sleep, Barry.”

“But I’m gonna be late.”

“You’ve got the day off.”

“Oh. Okay, then. Night, Len.”

He chuckles. “Good _night_ , Scarlet.”

I almost ask what’s funny, but a yawn hits me before I can, so I just snuggle closer to my pillow and drift back to sleep.

*

I wake up to the smell of bacon. It doesn’t make sense though because my pillow, I mean husband, is still trapped under me.

“Who’s cooking bacon?” I mumble into Len’s chest.

“It was meant to be Mick, but he took one step into the apartment, saw the blanket fort, and then left. I had to text Lise next, and she’s already sworn to use this as blackmail material for the next year.”

“She’s just jealous she never made a blanket fort this awesome.”

Lisa loudly scoffs from the kitchen. “ _She_ had to take apart the random tunnel you built to the fridge, so I could make you two breakfast,” she says.

I grin. “The Tunnel of Midnight Snacks is a sacred part of blanket forts everywhere.”

“Pretty sure that’s just you, Scarlet,” Len murmurs.

I don’t pout, no matter what lying thieves might say. But I do speed kiss my husband and disassemble the entire blanket fort before the siblings can so much as blink. If I happen to steal a bit of freshly cooked bacon, well, Lisa should know better than to keep food unguarded in the vicinity of a hungry speedster. I scroll through my phone at the dining table and grimace at the missed calls from Joe. There are a couple of messages from Eddie as well wondering if I’m okay after I took the day off work, so I reply to those first.

_‘All good, just had a late night.’_

I frown at my phone while considering whether to call Joe back or not. Eddie can pass on the message just fine, and I’m pretty sure I remember Len telling Captain Singh why I didn’t come in, so it’s not like I absolutely need to talk to Joe for him to find out that I’m okay.

“What’s wrong, Cutie?” Lisa asks, leaning against the kitchen bench.

“Trying to decide whether to call Joe back or not,” I answer without really thinking.

“You could always just text him if you’re not up to hearing his voice,” she points out.

“But if he’s ready to apologise…”

“Then he should be doing it in person,” Lisa says firmly.

I sigh. “He probably wants to hear for himself that I’m okay after yesterday.”

“What happened?” Lisa asks.

“Len didn’t tell you?”

Lisa returns to the stove. “All Lenny told me was that you had a bit of trouble with some badges.”

“Some patrol officers took things too far, which Eddie and Joe ended up witnessing for themselves.”

“Am I going to have to threaten someone, Cutie?”

The nickname finally registers, and I bury my face in my arms.

“Eddie and Joe already have,” I answer.

Len joins his sister in the kitchen, and grabs pancake ingredients. “Officers Henderson and Andrews have been transferred and demoted to traffic cops in Star City. Scarlet’s boss wasn’t impressed by them threatening one of his lead CSIs with a loaded weapon. The only reason they weren’t fired and thrown into jail is because there’s too high a risk of the jury agreeing with what they did.”

Lisa silently raises an eyebrow at Len to which he shakes his head at. I ignore the exchange and go back to staring at my phone.

“Do you think I should call Joe back?” I ask Len.

“I will if you don’t want to,” he answers with a challenging smirk.

I sigh and hit Joe’s contact.

He picks up immediately. “Barr, are you alright?”

“Yeah, only just woke up and saw my phone.”

“You didn’t go out last night, did you?” Joe asks, and I don’t think the chastising tone would’ve bugged me a year ago, but today it has me rolling my eyes.

“Stayed in and built a blanket fort with my husband, actually,” I correct.

“Right, Captain Cold and the Flash build blanket forts. That’s…”

“Something that doesn’t need to be shouted out in the middle of the precinct,” I suggest, earning me a concerned glance from Len, which I shake my head at.

I’m allowed to be angry until Joe apologises, and even then, I don’t think I’ll be able to instantly forgive him. That’s going to take some proof that he’s accepted Len and mine’s marriage. Like a certain dinner invitation for starters.

“Listen, Barry, I was wondering if you’d like to come over tomorrow night, and if you wanted to bring Cold, then that’s… You can bring him. If that’s what it takes for us to bridge this gap between us, then you can bring him.”

It takes me a few moments to realise that he’s being serious.

“Tomorrow?” I still question. “As in Saturday? As in…?”

“Yeah, I talked to Iris about it, and she-.”

“Convinced you that you’ve been in the wrong?” I ask, a little too sharply, gripping my phone tight.

Joe sighs. “I really am sorry for what happened yesterday, Barr. You know that, right?”

“Hey, Len,” I ask loud enough for Joe to hear, “did you send Bivolo to mess with Joe’s mind?”

I know it’s cruel, but it shouldn’t take a gun in my face for Joe to stop actively hating my husband.

Lisa laughs. “That sweetheart still can’t manage anything more than anger.”

“West already has that in abundance, Scarlet,” Len drawls. “It’d be a waste to try adding to it.”

“Huh, I guess he was being genuine right now when he invited the two of us to the Saturday Night Family Dinner.”

Len freezes. “He _what_?”

“You should go, Lenny,” Lisa says. “This time you can go through the front door instead of Cutie’s old bedroom window.”

“That’s not actually my name,” I point out.

Lisa smiles at me like I haven’t quite figured out how pointless my efforts are.

I sigh. “Do you want to go, Len? I don’t really care, either way.”

And something in my expression must say the opposite because Len grabs some chocolate chips to add to the pancake batter, even though he’s always refused to have anything but plain pancakes with bacon.

 “The lying, Scarlet,” Len says.

“We’ll be there,” I tell Joe, who’s probably heard our conversation, but I can’t bring myself to care.

Joe hangs up after an awkward goodbye, and this time when I speed into the kitchen, I leave the food alone.

“Thank you,” I mumble into Len’s shoulder, hugging him from behind.

“They’re just pancakes,” he says.

I kiss his cheek and steal the last chocolate chip. “The lying, Len.”

“Are you two ever not sweet?” Lisa asks, actually sounding put out.

“That’s all Len. He’s a sweetness machine, like ice-cream. No matter how frosty he tries to be, he can’t hide the sweetness.”

Len glares at me. “Did you seriously just compare me to ice-cream, Barry?”

“I love ice-cream,” I point out, ignoring Lisa’s fit of laughter. “And I love you more, of course, but that doesn’t mean-.”

Len cuts me off with a kiss, and I forget what I was going to say. Something tells me that was probably the point, but I can’t bring myself to care.

“You’re welcome,” Len whispers.

I beam and kiss him again, until Lisa’s laughing switches to awing. Half the bacon disappears from her serving plate in the next second, and I stretch out at the dining table.

“So, when’s breakfast going to be ready?” I ask with my best innocent smile.

Len just shakes his head, while Lisa folds her arms.

This is what family is meant to feel like.

*

Saturday Night Family Dinner has existed in the West household since the first weekend that I lived with Joe and Iris after my mum was killed and dad wrongfully jailed for it. The Wests had me convinced for almost a year that it was a pre-established tradition that I had to participate in. If it weren’t for Iris, I would’ve stayed in my room for meal times, but she absolutely insisted that I had to join them on Saturday nights because it was a tradition that was way older than her dad, which seemed super old to us at that age.

Iris admitted she’d made the whole thing up the day I stopped running away.  

I can count on one hand the amount of weekly dinners that I’ve chosen to miss. All bar one of those used to be because of Flash-related business. But then I wasn’t allowed to bring Len, my _husband_ , to a family tradition that was made up so that I would feel included in the West family. The thing is, I don’t know whether Joe remembered why the night became a tradition in the first place or not. And I don’t think I want to know. Because either way, it shows that Joe doesn’t care, not like he used to, and no sudden invitations are going to change that.

Len gives me a once over and raises an eyebrow. “Really, Scarlet? I thought you of all people wouldn’t want to push this.”

I shrug, pulling his parka tighter around me. “If Joe’s just acting like he’s accepting this to stop the arguing, then I want to know now, rather than letting him throw my trust away like it’s nothing again.”

“I’m certainly not objecting,” Len says. “Just don’t get any ideas about wearing it to work yet. I’ve got business out of town next week, and I won’t be able to bust you out when the entire precinct loses their minds.”

“It’s okay. Oliver would. Well, once he’s stopped laughing he would.”

Len passes me a bike helmet. “Things are good between you two then?”

I put it on and hop onto Len’s motorbike, wrapping my arms around him. “He’s started giving me tips on how to deal with getting back at parental figures, and mostly remembering that not everyone grew up a billionaire, so I’d say we’re good.”

“I’m guessing wearing a supervillain’s jacket wasn’t one of those tips,” Len says, starting the bike.

I just laugh and hold Len tighter. He shakes his head and drives us to Joe’s.

*

We thankfully don’t arrive first. Iris opens the door and bursts into half-hysterical giggling. She waves us inside, hand covering her mouth in an attempt to control herself, but the sound brings the attention of a nearby Eddie and Wally from the living room. Eddie just smiles while we put our helmets down, while Wally narrows his eyes.

“Isn’t that…?” he trails off.

“Yep,” I answer, flipping the hood on. “It’s really comfy, actually.”

“And warm,” Len adds. “Had to be considering the temperature the cold gun runs at. I’ve tried insulating it, but all my efforts lowered the maximum output.”

“Maybe I could-” Wally starts, before realising what he’s offering and shaking his head. “Ah, on second thoughts, I’d better not.” 

“Is that Barry?” Joe calls from the kitchen, and suddenly showing up here doesn’t make me feel like I’ve got the power in the situation at all.

What was I thinking? We’re never going to be welcome here, not even invited.

I grab Len’s hand. “Yeah,” I answer, all humour gone.

Len tugs me closer, pushes the hood back, and kisses my temple.

“You alright, Scarlet?” he whispers.

I try to say yes, but my voice doesn’t seem up to the job right now, so I just nod instead. Len sighs and rests his forehead against mine, hand gently resting against the back of my neck. I close my eyes and concentrate on his breathing, trying to match it. Len pecks the tip of my nose, making me open my eyes and glare at him, but the effect’s pretty ruined by my involuntary smile.

“Ice-cream,” I mumble.

“I am _not_ anything like ice-cream, Scarlet.”

“Lisa agrees with me.”

“You and my sister aren’t allowed to team up against me. It’s unfair, and as the fairest superhero of them all, you shouldn’t stand for it.”

“Did you just call me beautiful?”

Len kisses me. “Far more beautiful than Disney royalty. You can sing and dance better too.”

“Says the one who showed off his gorgeous voice for the first time on a Disney song.”

“What can I say? I like keeping my husband on his toes.”

I frown, and okay, maybe it’s a pout. “You don’t call me that enough.”

Len pulls me into a tight embrace. “Still getting used to having everything I could ever want and more, Scarlet.”

“I _guess_ that’s a good enough excuse.”

Len stills suddenly. “Hello, Detective West. How long have you been standing there for?”

I grip Len’s jacket and make eye contact with a concerned Iris.

“Dinner’s smelling great, Dad,” she says. “Want me to help you set up the table?”

“Can I say hello to my son first?” Joe asks.

I pull away from Len a bit, still holding onto his hand. “Why would you need to? Wally lives here.” I realise that was the wrong thing to say before anyone else’s brains can so much as process the raw audio input. “Sorry. I just. Sorry. Hey, Joe. What’s for dinner?”

“Lasagna,” he answers.

My favourite.

I try a smile, but I’m pretty sure it comes out awkward, and shrug off Len’s parka, immediately missing the encompassing warmth and Len-ness. I let go of Len’s hand to put the parka on the coat rack, and I have to stop myself from tapping into the speed force to grab Len’s hand quick enough. He doesn’t say anything about the lightning that’s undoubtedly flashing in my eyes, just holds my hand and stares Joe down in part defiance, part feigned casualness.

Iris crosses the room, saying something again about setting the table up, not that anyone’s really paying attention given how thick the tension is in here. I’m not sure even Iris knows what she’s saying because she trails off mid-sentence and just attempts to herd Eddie and Wally toward the dining room. Wally practically runs to escape the situation, while Eddie lingers for a moment, only leaving after I nod to him.

Len kisses my cheek and whispers, “Want me to stay?”

I just squeeze his hand tighter, and Len strokes my hand until I relax a little.

“ _Be Prepared_ from the Lion King,” Len says, smirking at Joe’s confusion. “That’s the song Scarlet here was talking about. Supergirl sang backup. She approved of the song choice.”

The unsaid ‘Supergirl approves of us’ clearly reaches Joe, who finally meets my eyes.

He opens his mouth to say something but shakes his head and closes it. I’m not sure why I’m disappointed. You need expectations for someone to disappoint you. And I can’t; I just can’t keep getting my hopes up only to have them constantly crushed.

“Thanks for inviting us,” I choke out.

Joe’s expression softens. “Of course, Barr. You know you’re always welcome here.”

“Am I?” I ask before I can stop myself, and Joe breaks eye contact.

He’s trying. I know he’s trying. That has to be enough. It shouldn’t make my hands shake. Len keeps stroking the hand he’s got, looking like he wants to take my other one as well, but doesn’t want to draw attention, or Joe will realise how uncomfortable I really am.

“Did you coat it with half a packet of cheese?” Len asks.

Joe glares at him for a split-second before checking himself, but I still notice, and Len probably does as well.

“What?” Joe asks.

“The lasagna,” Len says. “Scarlet only lets me cook it if I coat it with half a packet of cheese minimum. Otherwise, he kicks me out of the kitchen before I can even begin my explanation of why we don’t have that much cheese left in the packet, even though the reason usually begins with Barry and ends with Allen.”

I shrug. “We haven’t had that problem since you upgraded the fridge.”

“It would’ve been stupid of me not to when inviting a speedster to live me,” Len says.

“I know how to make my son’s favourite meal,” Joe snaps, more occupied with holding himself back than following the conversation.

Len meets the detective’s glare with a neutral smile. “Was just making conversation, West,” he says.

“Or purposely stirring trouble,” Joe mutters, eyeing something behind us before turning around. “It should be cool enough to eat by now.”

I follow his gaze to the parka hanging from his coat rack.

“That was my idea,” I say, following Joe to the dining room.

Len walks alongside me, taking in the house like he hadn’t waited here for hours last Christmas. I’m not even sure if we’ll be back here for the upcoming holiday. The thought makes me trip on nothing. Len doesn’t draw attention to my stumble but does squeeze my hand for assurance. I tap his hand twice to say, ‘it’s nothing’. I’m pretty sure Len’s decided that actually means ‘something is up, but I don’t want to talk about it’, despite me telling him otherwise. I guess we’ve always been able to read between the lines when the other isn’t saying something.

“Something wrong with your jackets, Barry?” Joe asks.

“I just wanted to wear my husband’s. Seems like a pretty normal thing to do.”

“Normal people aren’t-” Joe cuts himself off. “Never mind.”

I almost ask what he was going to say, but whatever bit of rational thought I’ve managed to hold onto for the night stops me. Pushing this was a bad idea. Maybe coming here at all was a bad idea too. We’re not ready to go back to normal. I don’t even know what the new normal would be anymore. I can’t imagine what an ideal dinner with family would begin to look like. I don’t know who’d be at the table. I’m not sure I know what it’d look like for Joe either. I don’t know if I’d be there, wedding ring that matches Len’s and all.

“Everything okay?” Iris asks, as we take our seats: Joe at the head of the table, Wally at the end, Iris and Eddie on one side, and Len and me on the other.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” Joe asks, like he has a really obvious answer, but thankfully knows better than to say it.

I pick up my fork and almost immediately drop it from how much my hand’s shaking. Len grabs his fork with his left hand, so he has the other free to grab my spare hand and keep stroking it on top of the table. Iris smiles at the sight, but I can feel Joe glaring at it, glaring at us.

“Dinner looks great, Joe,” Eddie says.

“Uh huh,” Joe says, and he’s still looking at me.

I try a smile, but I don’t think it comes out right, so I take a bite of the lasagna instead, and chew it without really tasting anything.

“So,” Iris says loudly, “Eddie said something about you two thinking of getting a kitten.”

“Scarlet seems to be under the impression that if we do get one, it’ll end up sleeping on the bed,” Len says.

“You don’t want it to?” Wally asks.

“I don’t particularly care where Snowflake sleeps, but I don’t believe for one minute that it’s not going to end up sharing Barry’s favourite pillow.”

I almost choke on the lasagna. “We’re not calling her Snowflake! And she’s not going to sleep on top of you. I’d push her off if she tried.”

“Wait a moment,” Iris interrupts. “Did you just say that Len was your favourite pillow?”

“Only pillow more like,” Len grumbles.

I roll my eyes. “If you ever had a problem with it, then you would’ve said as much. And Iris, you’ve seen my phone’s background. Why wouldn’t Len be my favourite pillow?”

Eddie sighs. “And just when I managed to forget about that bet.”

“What bet?” Wally asks.

Eddie explains, while Iris debates kitten names with Len, and for a moment it almost feels right, like this is what my family is meant to be like. But then I notice Joe. And he hasn’t taken a bite. He hasn’t said anything. He hasn’t stopped watching me like he can’t quite understand what he’s seeing.

And suddenly everything is just wrong. The lasagna has gone from not tasting like anything at all, to tasting like that particular flavour of ash after I’ve just had a bomb blow up in my face. I can’t quite direct my fork to give me more, and even if I could, it wouldn’t matter because it keeps shaking, and the food keeps sliding right off. My foot has started tapping too, thumping a steady rhythm of _wrong, wrong, wrong_ , and I don’t know if I can stop it. I don’t know if I want to stop it. Because it’s right. This is wrong. It’s all wrong, even when it seemed right.

And I can’t do this. I _can’t_. I cannot do this.

My fork clatters to the table. I look to Len, an apology on the tip of my tongue.

“It’s alright, Scarlet,” he says, already putting his fork down and shifting his chair back. “I’ll see you there.”

I try to thank him, but I can’t stay here any longer. I have to go. I have to. So I speed kiss Len, and leave Joe’s house in a blur of lightning before anyone can try to keep me there a moment longer.

I run through the city, just run and run and run, until I can feel the adrenaline wearing off, and I get home a moment after Len does. He doesn’t ask any questions, just pulls me close on the couch and runs his hand through my hair. The tears finally hit, and I break into uncontrolled sobbing against Len. He doesn’t bother with meaningless platitudes, just holds me tighter and lets the tears run their course. I’m not sure how much time passes until I manage to catch a breath, eyes burning, but no longer pouring waterfalls down my face.

“I don’t know what set me off,” I admit, my voice raw. “I should’ve been fine. Everything was going fine, but I just couldn’t handle it. Why couldn’t I just handle it, Len? Why’d I have to screw it up?”

Len cradles my face between his hands, but I still don’t look him in the eye. “You didn’t screw anything up, Barry. Hey, look at me, Scarlet.” I do. “Would I lie to you about this? About something this important to you even if it was just to make you feel better?” he asks.

“No.”

“Then believe me when I say that you did nothing wrong. You were well within your rights to test whether West was being genuine in wanting us there. After the way he’s been treating you lately, you were being positively civil in comparison. Sure, he might not have been saying anything against us tonight, but that didn’t mean he apologised, or said anything positive either. Yes, he was trying to be better. But that doesn’t suddenly undo his mistakes. You might be the most forgiving person I’ve ever met, Barry, but that doesn’t mean you should be expected to instantly forgive someone that you had complete trust in.”

“I want to though. I want this weird tension to just go away already.”

Len strokes my cheek, wiping away my last tear.

“You can’t force yourself to forgive him, Barry,” he says. “If you do, it’s just going to hurt you more, and I can’t let you do that to yourself. If I _ever_ betray you in any way, you better not force yourself to forgive me just because you love me. Because I’d deserve your anger, Scarlet, all of it. You shouldn’t have to bottle it up, so things can go back to normal. That’s not your responsibility. It’s up to the one who wronged you to make up for it, and if you find that you can’t forgive them for it, then don’t. That doesn’t mean you won’t ever be able to move on, but if they don’t give you a good enough apology and make up for it, or even if you just don’t think you _can_ forgive them, then that isn’t your fault. Okay? It’s not your fault.”

“Not my fault,” I repeat. “It’s not my fault.”

Len gently kisses me and pulls me into a tight hug. I bury my face into his shoulder and smile at the feeling of Len draping something warm and all-too-familiar over me. The parka hood falls over my eyes and I let myself fully relax. Safe. That certainly wasn’t what I felt when I first saw this jacket, but now, this here is the safest I could possibly feel. No tension, no fear, and no expectations. Just Len.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn’t actually plan for Barry to run out of dinner, but that’s just the natural way the chapter went.


	18. Power Play

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did my best to keep this chapter contained to the overall fic rating, but it might still exceed it. Remember those consequences in the fic description? Well, you didn’t think the worst of it was going to be the Joe and Cisco messes, did you?

Captain Singh pointedly looks at the bright red line that Julian painted across the doorway this morning, and then back at the unrepentant CSI with his arms crossed at his desk.

“It’s my fault, sir,” I say, surprising Julian into uncrossing his arms. “See, I told Len about the red line idea, but he didn’t take me seriously, and when I happened to mention that to Julian…”

Singh sighs. “So long as it doesn’t interfere with your work, I don’t care. That said, if for some bizarre reason the mayor ends up visiting the lab of our precinct’s two best CSIs, I’m not explaining to her why you’ve chosen to deface city property.”

He leaves on that note, taking a moment to shake his head at the red line on his way out. I get back to cross-referencing a DNA sample with the CCPD database. There’s no match, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that my theory that the thief has done this before is wrong. I widen my results to include the SCPD. The way the thief moved said she was expecting to be suddenly stopped, and I thought that meant she was looking out for the Flash, but if she’s from Star City, then she might’ve been expecting the Arrow to suddenly drop down. It’s not like Oliver hasn’t followed criminals to Central City before, so the fear wouldn’t be completely unwarranted.

“How’d he find out about the line anyway?” I wonder aloud, smiling when the sample gets a match.

Chantelle Gibson, born in Central City and moved to Star City after the accelerator explosion.

“I’m ninety percent sure that your husband mentioned it in their conversation on Friday,” Julian answers. “I never thought I’d see the day when a police captain and a thief talked politely over the phone before I met you, Allen.”

I check Gibson’s DNA for the meta-gene because of the timing. Having the police on their trail might cause a meta to start using their abilities out of desperation, so it’s best to be sure.

“You make it sound like everything weird in your life is my fault,” I say.

“Isn’t it?”

I roll my eyes. “My robbery case is a meta, but it doesn’t look like she used her abilities on this one. Want to take over, or do you deem me professional enough to handle it?”

“Trying to push your work onto me, Allen?” Julian asks dryly.

It almost sounds like he’s joking, but Julian hasn’t really made any jokes before, so I can’t be certain.

“Why would I ever do that?” I ask. “I’m the most professional member of the CCPD. Captain Singh was applauding my ability to be on time the day we met.”

“Only because he’s usually deploring your tardiness.”

“It’s hardly my fault I’ve been cursed with chronic lateness since I was a child.”

A laugh comes from the door. “Snart married someone with poor timekeeping skills. That’s almost as much of a surprise as him marrying a badge.”

Mark Mardon stands outside our door, smiling like a wolf who hasn’t quite figured out how to fit into sheep’s clothing. His stance reminds me of Officers Henderson’s and Andrews’s. I send my findings through to the case’s detectives and switch my full attention to the Rogue most reluctant to accept me. 

“You’re not allowed here,” Julian says, voice wavering for a moment. “No Rogues are allowed past that red line, not even your leader. Not to mention there’s still an active warrant out for your arrest.”

“What this line?” Mardon asks. He scoffs and steps over it. “Relax, I’m here to talk to Allen, not you.”

Julian glares at me. I stand up, unlocking my phone without breaking eye contact with Mardon.

“What are you doing here?” I ask, scrolling through my contacts until I hit Mick’s.

“Snart told me to come check on you with him and his sister out of town,” Mardon says.

I ask Mick whether that’s true, sending a snowflake emoji as well, so he asks Len.

“It’s not like I’m going to get in trouble in the middle of the precinct,” I point out.

Julian thankfully doesn’t mention last week’s incident.

“I didn’t think badges lied so easily,” Mardon says, flicking sparks off his fingers like it’s just a habit, but I’ve known that Mardon was going to be the Rogue I’d have the most trouble with since we told them my identity. “No offense, _Barry_ , it’s just that I heard a rumour about two officers getting kicked out of town after they were caught threatening a fellow member of the force. It wasn’t hard to put two and two together considering how reluctant Snart was to go on that job.”

“Funny how quickly the last person who tried to threaten me in my own lab got dealt with,” I say.

Mardon laughs. “You think I’m here to threaten you, Allen? Didn’t you forget that Snart told us to look out for you? _You_ , the foster son of the man who shot my brother. But that’s all in the past now. Isn’t it? We’re a family now, Allen. We’re meant to look out for each other. We’re not going to go around threatening each other now. That’d be ridiculous. As insane as a badge marrying a thief. Or that thief thinking he can control someone with actual power, just because I happened to owe him one. It’s not like he sold me out to the Flash after I did him the service of breaking his ass out of prison.”

“Julian, I think you should take your lunch break,” I say.

“Why, don’t want him to know your little secret, _Flash_?” Mardon asks.

I speed Julian into the alley downstairs and run back inside, blocking Mardon from the exit.

“Always got to be the hero,” Mardon says, wind gathering around him. “Did you think I’d attack the precinct, Flash? Think I’m really that stupid? I know they’ve got meta dampeners all over the place thanks to you and your friends at Star Labs. They’ve even got them in here. Just one hit of a button, and they’ll come on. Isn’t that right?”

“What do you want?” I bite out.

Mardon lets a few bolts hit the wall and ceiling. I can’t help the flinch at lightning being in this lab.

“Isn’t it obvious, Flash?” Mardon asks.

“Spell it out for me.”

Mardon lets loose another bolt. The lights flicker.

“I’m not forgiving you just because Snart’s gone soft.”

“And you think that just because Len isn’t around that I can’t still handle my own?”

He laughs. “Maybe you’re right, but I bet that if it came down to it, and neither of us were a meta, I’d beat you.”

But… No. I check where the lightning’s been hitting and feel the blood drain from my face right as the speed force stops rising up. The meta dampeners. I clench my fists and glare at Mardon, but he’s already got a gun pointed at my face. I’m in my lab, again, with a gun pointed at me, _again_. But this time nobody’s here to have my back. And I can’t use my powers to dodge a bullet. I can’t help the brief glance to my phone, still lying on my desk. Mardon follows my gaze and scoffs.

“You really think anybody would come and help even if you could make it there fast enough?” he asks. “Team Flash is more pathetic than ever, and none of the other Rogues in town would give a damn.”

Mick will contact Len. It’s fine. I’ve just got to keep Mardon talking long enough.

“Are you really going to shoot me in the middle of the precinct then?” I ask. “Every single cop downstairs would hear that shot, and they would’ve seen you come up here.”

“You know, you’re absolutely right. It’s a good thing I stole one of these from Snart then,” he says, holding up an extrapolator.

I dart forward to snatch it off him, but Mardon expects the motion and opens the breach. He grabs my arm and tugs me towards the breach. I struggle against him and throw a punch. Mardon takes the hit. Then he presses the gun against my stomach. No. No! NO! Pain explodes in my stomach. I shove my hand at Mardon’s face, trying to just get away, but he doesn’t budge, just throws me through the breach. I crash into the concrete floor and have a second for my speed to start returning before Mardon jumps through the breach and shoots each of my knees. My throat burns from the scream that tears its way out of me.

“You know, Allen, I was actually okay with Snart marrying a badge, even one that happened to be close to Detective West. Sure, I was obligated to have you kidnapped just to make sure that Snart was serious, but that was going to be it. I _had_ planned on leaving you alone. But then he turns up at our hideout with not only a badge, but the Scarlet Speedster himself. And you, you throw out this apology over my brother, like that brings him back, like you didn’t have us metas thrown into solitary confinement without a trial. You heroes may be all about forgiveness, but us _villains_ , we’re about paying our debts. You, Barry Allen, owe me a hell of a lot.”

Mardon crouches down, digging the barrel of his gun into my stomach wound. “I’m going to start with a little pain. And then I’m going to become the man who killed the Flash.”

I tap into the speed force and watch Mardon’s scowl freeze. It’s easy to bat away his gun, but my healing wouldn’t normally be up to taking care of three bullet wounds this soon, even if my powers weren’t recovering from being dampened. I shuffle away from Mardon and consider trying to stand. The very thought makes me want to vomit. Mardon’s scowl starts to deepen slightly, so I concentrate back on keeping my speed up. I keep shuffling backwards, even as the pain in my stomach and knees makes me want to pass out. Blood trails across the concrete. I try to at least keep pressure on my stomach, but using my speed is only making it worst.

I spare the hope that Mick’s not passed out drunk somewhere before letting go of the speed force and consciousness.

*

Being struck by lighting isn’t a feeling you forget. It also isn’t a feeling I ever want to be woken by. And certainly not for the third time today. Pain surges through my body, ripping a sob past my abused throat. Mardon grins above me, methodically checking over the meta cuffs binding my wrists above my head. Another pair secure my ankles to the dentist style chair, not that I’d be able to put any pressure on my legs with my knees left untreated and unable to heal.

“It’s almost a pity to kill you,” Mardon comments lightly, seeming to contemplate the miniature storm hovering above his palm. A flash of lightning strays from the storm. I flinch. Mardon smiles. “But it’d be such a wasted opportunity to let you live. Can you just imagine how the city will react to the Flash’s death? Though I imagine they won’t care enough when they learn exactly who was wearing the mask. You’ll just end up remembered as the superhero who married his own nemesis.”

I don’t have it in me to point out that Captain Cold has never been the Flash’s nemesis. Instead, I just glare at Mardon and continue to strain fruitlessly against the meta cuffs.

“It’s Snart’s reaction that I’m most looking forward to,” Mardon says, gaining my attention quicker than any of his previous efforts. “You were there when he iced his old man, weren’t you? How do you think he’s going to react when he comes back to you dead? He’ll go after me. That, I don’t doubt, but there are far easier targets, people who should’ve been there to stop me. Just how many friends does the _Flash_ have anyway? I thought I would’ve encountered at least a little trouble from them by now, not that I wouldn’t have been able to handle them. Unless, of course, they’re simply not coming. I wouldn’t bother if I were them. You are a terrible excuse for a hero, after all. They’re probably glad for the excuse to finally be rid of you.”

They are coming. Even if Mick never saw my text, Julian knows I’m the Flash. He’ll tell someone, Eddie maybe, and the only reason nobody’s has arrived yet is because they haven’t found us. That’s it. They’re coming. I just have to keep Mardon talking, keep him wanting me alive, and then Cisco will open a breach right into here. I’m not alone in this. They’ll come for me. They’ll realise that something is up. Someone has to notice. A gunshot went off in the middle of the CCPD. Somebody would’ve investigated that. They’d figure out Mardon took me. They will.

“I’ve got to wonder though,” Mardon says, hitting me with another wave of lightning. “Do you think your heart’s going to give out first, or are the bullet wounds going to finish you off?”

“K-killing me won’t bring your brother back,” I choke out.

Mardon digs the barrel of his gun into my stomach. “You think I don’t know that?” he snaps. “ _Nothing_ is going to bring him back. But at least killing you will make my life a little bit easier. This city will go back to fearing us, instead of expecting killers to play hero just because Snart got distracted by a pretty face. The Rogues have almost complete control over crime in Central City, and what does he do with it? He gives our enemy a break between his day job of catching crooks, and his night job of doing the same. Snart may have gotten weak, and his sister along with him, but the rest of the Rogues, they’ll see how much better things will be without the Flash interfering with our business.”

Mardon presses the gun against my forehead. “Maybe I should just kill you right now. I could coin toss it. Heads, you live for another hour. Tails, I put a bullet in your skull. Let’s say you get that hour. In one more hour, I’d flip the coin again, and again, and again, until it lands of tails, and you finally get to escape the pain.”

“You don’t have to do this,” I beg. “I get that you’re angry at me. And I get that I made a lot of mistakes when I was just starting out. Hell, I still make mistakes every single time I put the Flash suit on. And sometimes I wonder, alright. Sometimes I wonder if it wouldn’t be better if someone else had these powers, if someone else was the one making these choices because I’m not good enough. I know that. I’ve let people get hurt before when I could’ve done something. Good people and bad people, all the same. I should’ve saved your brother. I shouldn’t have gone against my ethics and locked up any of the metas the way I did. I should’ve stood my ground on there being another option and not tried to ship you all off to some deserted island.

“That was wrong of me, and I’m sorry. I am so, so sorry. But I am asking you, begging you, please don’t do this. If you kill me, if you use me to get to Len, then he is going to _destroy_ you. He’ll become the worst villain Central City has ever seen, and it won’t be an upgrade for you. It won’t be better for anyone, least of all Len. So please, don’t take this out on him. He gave you a home, a new family, and you’re going to tear out his heart because of what I did. Len didn’t want this, us. He refused it, but I pushed and pushed, and never gave him a choice, not really. So you can’t blame him, can’t punish him for what I did.

“Punish me instead. _Please_. I’ll give up being the Flash if that’s what it takes. Just don’t kill me; don’t hurt Len like that. Please don’t hurt him.”

Mardon laughs. He takes out his wallet with his free hand, keeping the gun pressed to my head with the other. I can’t so much as glance away while he pulls out a coin. Mardon rests his finger against the trigger and flips the coin.

“What do you know, Flash?” Mardon says with a twisted grin. “It’s heads. Guess you get to live another hour.”

*

He won’t let me fall unconscious.

Heads.

Every bolt of electricity sends my muscles seizing, my skin burning, and my nerve endings exploding in unending pain.

Heads.

The meta cuffs shatter from the force of the lightning, but all that means is I end up writhing on the floor.

Heads.

My body tries to heal.

Heads.

Make it stop. Make it stop. Make it stop!

Heads.

I don’t want to die.

Heads.

*

It takes me a moment to realise that the yelling isn’t coming from me. Sounds of fighting fill the warehouse. The noise of Mardon’s lightning makes me curl into myself and clap my hands over my ears. I can’t take any more of it. I can’t. Familiar voices clamour over each other. Mardon’s gone silent. But it might be a trick. Nobody’s coming. I’ve finally lost it. The pain’s making me hallucinate. There’s no way Len’s standing there with Kara, Oliver, Cisco, Caitlin, Joe and Eddie. They’re not real.

The Not-Len drops to his knees in front of me.

“I’m sorry, Barry,” he whispers, gently caressing my cheek.

Hallucinations can’t touch you.  

“Len?” I mumble. “You’re real?”

His composure falters for a moment, but then Len presses a kiss against my forehead, the same spot the gun rested for every coin flip. I flinch at the thought, agony tearing through my body at the movement. I can’t help a whimper at the pain. Len mutters a sharp curse and moves so he’s cradling me in his arms.

“It’s okay, Scarlet. I’ve got you.”

I try to smile, but it hurts. It hurts so much.

“I know, Barry. I know.”

“I… Len, I don’t want to die. I gotta… I gotta take the pain, so he won’t kill me, Len, so he won’t hurt you. But it hurts _so much_. It won’t stop. Len, it won’t stop. Please. Please make it stop.”

Someone’s crying. I can’t. I can’t tell who. But they sound so sad. Why do they sound so sad?

“The ice numbs it, doesn’t it, Scarlet? The ice will numb it.”

“Y-yeah. Cold takes the pain away. Len always takes the pain away.”

“But it’ll slow your healing too.”

Oh.

“I can’t die,” I insist. “If I die, then it’ll hurt Len, so I can’t. I gotta take the pain, so I don’t die. I gotta. He won’t use me to hurt Len. He won’t.”

“You’re not going to die, Scarlet. I’m going to take the pain away, okay? And you’re going to be fine. We’ll be going to other Earths to sing karaoke in no time.”

“P-promise?”

“Promise.”

There’s a bright blue light next, but Len promised it’ll be okay, so I just close my eyes and let it wash over me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...


	19. Visiting Hours

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 10,000 hits. I don’t think I can possibly express how happy I was to see this fic hit 10,000 freaking hits. There might’ve been incoherent squeaking noises involved when I realised how close it was. Uni then decided to remind me that it was back and kicking, so I’m late on this chapter, but it’s here, and I hope you all enjoy it.

One moment I’m drifting through an abyss of nothing, the next, my eyes snap open, the speed force rises in my veins, and every cell in my body feels like their racing each other in which can vibrate the fastest. The result, I fall straight through the hospital bed and crash into the concrete. I roll to the side, so that I don’t slow down and end up with a bed embedded in me, and I take in my surroundings. No Mardon. Familiar despite the low-lighting. Caitlin rushing forward to help me.

Star Labs. Safe.

I let my head fall back with a thud, but there’s barely any pain from it. Guess Caitlin finally figured out some speedster friendly pain meds. She crouches in front of me, opens her mouth to say something, but I take another glance around the empty med bay at that moment, and whatever Caitlin says goes unheard.

“Where’s Len?” I ask, scrambling to sit up. “Is he okay? Where is he? Len should be here. He’d want to be here.”

There’s a rush of wind, and Kara appears, my husband with her. Len immediately drops to the floor and steadies me.

“Sorry, Scarlet. Kara dragged me away for a moment to eat something. If I’d known you were close to waking, I would’ve stayed.”

I relax into his arms. “You’re okay,” I mumble. “We’re both okay.”

“The pain killers are working then?” Len asks, half-directing the question to me and half to Caitlin.

I nod. “Vibrating through the bed probably didn’t help though.”

Len gives me a look so full of absolute adoration and exasperation that I feel myself go as red as his nickname for me.

“Did you want a hand back up?” Kara asks.

Len doesn’t give me a chance to answer, merely scooping me into his arms and gently placing me on the hospital bed.

“You know she wasn’t implying that you were incapable of moving me, right?” I ask.

Len sits on the bed behind me, bringing my head to rest on his thigh instead of the pillow. “I know,” he says.

I automatically snuggle into him and reach for his hand, audience or not.

Kara smiles. “So you two really are incapable of not being cute together,” she says.

“You might be onto something,” Caitlin comments. “Though I’m not sure I would’ve believed it when Barry first started giving Len more leeway than any of his other villains.”

The reminder of villains wipes the smile from my face.

“What happened to Mardon?” I ask, squeezing Len’s hand when he goes tense.

“He’ll be in CCPD custody in two hours,” Oliver answers, walking into the room and folding his arms. He’s still dressed in his Arrow uniform, even if his hood is down and mask off. “I’ve only just come from where Mick Rory and Lisa Snart are detaining him. I reminded Mardon why Star City has vigilantes when Central has heroes.”

Kara frowns, but doesn’t say anything. Len doesn’t even seem disappointed that he won’t get the opportunity to personally deal with Mardon, though I’m sure Lisa and Mick will deal with the traitorous Rogue. I try to dredge up the usual sense of guilt that I’d feel in this situation, but then the memory of the coin flips hits, and all I can feel is relief. It’s different from what it was like with Zoom. Mardon’s punishment is living with the consequences and facing the proper legal repercussions. Nobody would risk busting out the guy who kidnapped and tortured Captain Cold’s husband. And I’m sure Oliver, Mick and Lisa have ensured he won’t be saying a thing about CSI Barry Allen and the Flash being one in the same.

“How long was I out for anyway?” I ask.

“Twenty-seven hours, five minutes and thirty-nine seconds,” Len answers, voice simultaneously devoid of emotion and brimming with it. “Mardon had you for eight hours, forty-one minutes, and twelve seconds before we arrived, not including the time he spent at the CCPD.”

Kara stares at Len. “You are really good at keeping track of time.”

“Master thief,” he reminds her.

“I’m guessing the bullet wounds have healed then,” I say.

 Len goes rigid.

“Mardon got five arrows to nerve points for every bullet he put into you,” Oliver says.

I shouldn’t feel remotely happy about that. I shouldn’t. But Mardon flipping that coin and declaring it heads, every single time, settles in the back of my mind like a horror scene stuck on repeat. I don’t know if Mardon was even bothering to flip the coin after the first few times, or if he was calling it as it landed, rather than whichever option he preferred.

“What happened to the coin?” I find myself asking, hiding my face in Len’s thigh.

“What coin?” Caitlin asks.

“Mardon’s coin.”

“I can check the warehouse,” Kara offers.

“It’s fine. I’d rather not see it again,” I say. “In fact, if we could just ban coin flips in general, that’d be great.”

Oliver’s expression darkens.

“Could I speak to my husband alone for a moment?” Len asks, voice strained.

Oliver merely nods and leaves. I’m not sure whether to feel glad that he’s learned to trust Len or worry that he’s most likely going to give Mardon one last visit before he’s taken into CCPD custody.

Kara hesitates. “It’s not that I don’t want to give you two a moment, but I don’t actually know anyone else on this Earth, or even where anything is in this city aside from here and that warehouse, so I’m not really sure where I’m meant to go.”

“You can come with me to tell everyone that Barry’s awake,” Caitlin says. “I’m sure they could use the distraction of someone from another planet right now.”

Len waits five seconds after they’ve left to move his legs onto the hospital bed and shuffle down until I can lie on his chest like usual.

“Are you okay, Barry?” he asks.

“The pain killers are working fine. How’d Caitlin manage that anyway?”

“Please don’t try to deflect right now.”

I pick at Len’s shirt. “Mardon wanted to kill me. The only reason he didn’t the moment those meta-dampeners at the CCPD went up was because he wanted me to suffer first.”

“And the coin flip?” Len asks.

I look up at him. “You know that I don’t blame you for this, right? Not for one moment did I blame you.”

“I know,” he says, almost as if he’s resigned to the fact.

“I knew everything would be okay, because I knew you would rescue me. And you did. You worked with a bunch of heroes to help me, and–”

“Mardon only found out the Flash’s identity because I brought him into the Rogues, knowing he had a grudge against you and West. Mardon only had a way of breaching into the CCPD unnoticed and getting you out because I was stupid enough to leave an extrapolator unguarded in a room full of thieves. Mardon only had the opportunity to kidnap you in the first place because I left town, even with what happened last weekend. I don’t know what I would’ve done if we had found you too late, Scarlet. The only thing that kept me from beating Mardon to death was the fact that you were bleeding out with multiple bullet wounds and signs of electrocution, and I couldn’t bring myself to leave your side.”

“Thank you.”

Len stares at me incredulously. “What?”

I lean up to kiss him. “Thank you for staying by my side.”

His tension drains. “You’re impossible, Barry Allen.”

I shrug and settle back down on Len.

“Did you still want to hear about the coin flip?” I ask.

“Only if you’re ready to talk about it.”

“I am.” And I do, even if it means having to stop at several points for both our sakes.

*

By the time Caitlin comes back to give me my next dose, Len has fallen asleep. I sit up without jostling him, and wince as the movement stretches my now sore stomach. My knees have at least settled into a dull throb that’s manageable so long as I don’t try to move my legs too much. I down the pills with a cup of waters and mouth a thank you to Caitlin. She smiles, checks that I can still move my toes, and then dims the med bay lights on her way out.

I could lie back down, but I’m not going to fall asleep anytime soon, so there’s no point trying to move again. Len, on the other hand, looks like he hasn’t slept a moment in over two days, and he has dark circles under his eyes to show for it. I trace the dark circles, smiling when Len turns his head into my hand. I’ve got to remember to thank everyone who dropped what they were doing to help rescue me, even if I’m pretty sure the amount of people that did show up to fight Mardon was overkill. It’s nice to know that despite what certain people might think of Len and me being together, they still stood with him when it came to me being in trouble.

Maybe all of this will convince Joe and Cisco that working with Len on other matters wouldn’t be so bad.

Len stirs slightly, so I kiss the tip of his nose and grin at his muttered ‘Scarlet’.

“Go back to sleep,” I whisper.

“Missin’ my blanket,” he mutters.

I roll my eyes and shuffle back down, so that I’m sprawled on top of him, with my head on his chest.

“Better?” I ask.

Len wraps an arm around my back and hums. I link my right hand with his left, and absentmindedly stroke his ring with my thumb. I’ve no doubt that the worst of being able to wear these has passed now, and even if it somehow hasn’t, I’m sure that we’ll be able to face the consequences together. At least now I know that we’ll have the support of the team here at Star Labs, and the Flash’s allies should we need them.

*

I don’t realise I’ve fallen asleep until an argument in the cortex wakes me up.

“Can I please just visit him?” Joe asks.

“I don’t want to risk waking either of them up,” Caitlin says. “This is the first time Barry’s naturally fallen asleep since the morning before being kidnapped, and the first time that Len’s slept at all in over forty-eight hours. Barry’s not going to be able to leave anytime soon, so it’s not like you’ll miss seeing him once he does wake up.”

Len taps his fingers against my ribs lightly enough that if I was still asleep, I wouldn’t notice.

“How long have they been talking for?” I ask in a whisper.

“Long enough for West to switch from asking to demanding and back five times.”

“No exact minutes and seconds?”

“Their arguing woke me up, so I wouldn’t be able to give an accurate measurement of when they started.”

“I’d believe you if I didn’t already know that hearing Joe’s voice would’ve instantly woken you up.”

Len sighs. “Fine, I was too distracted by trying to check your wounds without waking you up to notice when they started.”

I squeeze his hand. “I’m fine, Len. The pain right now is nothing compared to recovering from a broken back, and I haven’t even lost feeling in my legs this time around. I might have to be sidelined from being the Flash until my knees are completely healed, and storms are going to be even worse than before, but I’ll recover.”

“What about your lab at the CCPD?”

The lab where I was first struck by lightning. The lab where I saw the Reverse Flash for the first time since the night he killed my mother. The lab where two officers threatened me with a loaded weapon. The lab where Mardon shot me point blank after I trusted him enough to reveal my identity to him.

But it’s also the same place that so much good has happened.

I’ve helped bring in countless criminals from that lab. I spent hours upon hours trying to solve my mother’s murder in that lab. And most of all, Len and I said ‘I love you’ for the first time in that lab, not because of some big romantic moment, but because working there, doing my best to help people using the skills and intelligence that no dark matter has gifted me, that’s where I am the best version of Barry Allen. I can’t stop working there because of Mardon. I won’t let him have that victory over me.

“I don’t think Julian would mind a security upgrade,” I say. “In fact, maybe we can coordinate a contract between Star Labs and the CCPD for a tech overhaul when it comes to security. We could implement similar methods here with an easy access point for Gideon once she’s developed enough. I’m not going to be able to return to work until a normal person would’ve healed from a point-blank shot to the stomach, so I’ll have plenty of free time where I both can’t work as a CSI or the Flash. We could get started on Gideon’s mainframe, and Cisco could work with the CCPD in the meantime. Maybe Caitlin would like to see what we can do about bringing in more personnel to Star Labs proper. She’d have no problem overseeing medical developments again and it’d be good for her to focus on something aside from her new powers.”

“That sounds great, Barry,” Caitlin says. “Though it would’ve been nice to know that the two of you were awake.”

I open my eyes and ignore Len laughing at me. Caitlin’s standing in front of me, her arms crossed in an attempt to be disapproving, but her smile ruins the affect. Joe is behind her, nothing but relief in his expression.

“Good to see you well enough to plan out the time you should be spending on bedrest,” Joe says.

I open my mouth to make some sort of comment about Barry Allen and bedrest not mixing, or to thank him for joining the rescue, or anything that would make sense in this situation right now. But then I remember just how many people were there to rescue me, and just how powerful some of them are. What if Joe only came because it was expected of him? Or because I was taken at the CCPD as Barry Allen and Captain Singh ordered Joe and Eddie to take point in finding me. I don’t doubt that Eddie would’ve come regardless, but would Joe have really willingly worked with Len like that? What’s the likelihood that Joe blamed Len for what Mardon did? Would he have said as much to Len, or would he have kept it to himself when he noticed himself outnumbered by those who’ve already said they approve of him?

“It wasn’t Len’s fault,” I say. “I don’t care how you try to frame it. What Mardon did wasn’t Len’s fault.”

Joe stares at me like I’ve just said something obvious.

“Of course not,” he says.

Len and I share equal looks of surprise. I think that breaks Joe’s heart a little, but I can’t assure him right now. I can’t say that everything’s going to go back to the way it was before Len, before the lightning even, because it won’t. Sure, I’m glad Joe finally seems to not blame Len for everything that goes wrong, but that doesn’t change the fact that he did before, that he pushed too far, and that I was right in my fear of telling him the truth in the first place. And he hasn’t even properly apologised for it.

My relationship with Joe isn’t broken, just different. And I really hope he doesn’t try anything to fix it this time.

I clear my throat. “Thank you, then. For helping with the rescue and all.”

“Thank your husband. He’s the one who brought everyone together and convinced Captain Singh to work with the Arrow, Supergirl, Team Flash, and the Rogues.”

“You almost sound impressed, West,” Len comments.

Joe scowls, then seems to remember himself. “Look, I can’t say that I’ll ever like you, but it’s obvious to anyone who looks at the two of you for five seconds that you’re in love with each other. And sure, I’d prefer if Barry hadn’t chosen to be with someone who has hurt him and his friends in the past, but if these past weeks have proven anything, it’s that it isn’t my decision who Barry does and doesn’t forgive. It was never up to me, and I’m sorry for not realising that.

“I wish it was because Barry’s heart is his biggest weakness, something that you pegged within seconds of seeing him as the Flash the first time. But I don’t think you’d ever willingly hurt him and that’s going to have to be enough for me. I couldn’t bare to be the reason that drove me and my son apart, so if accepting the two of you fitting together despite it making no logical sense is the only way I get to be a part of Barry’s life, then I guess Captain Cold is my son-in-law.”

“Okay,” I say.

“Okay?” Len questions.

“That’s a good start, but it’s going to be a while until I can trust you again, Joe. I don’t know how long it’ll take, or what will have to change for sure, but I know that I’m not ready to be family again. And I am sorry for that because I want everything to be okay. I need that. But it isn’t. You had the right to be angry, but that doesn’t justify what you did while you were angry. You went too far, Joe. It’s like there was this line of justifiable anger, and you saw that as a starting point. I honestly don’t know if I’ll ever be able to fully trust you again, and I hate that. I hate that something so pure, something that’s meant to the happiest time of my life, was tarnished like that. But it was. And you can’t just take it back.”

“Then I’ll do whatever it takes to make up for it,” Joe says.

“No.”

This time it’s Catlin who looks at me like I’m out of my mind.

“No?” she questions.

“I don’t want anyone to force themselves to get along with Len when they genuinely don’t like him. I’m not expecting everyone in my life to be friends. I’d rather they be decent people to one another and not treat me any differently because of who I choose to keep in my life. Is that really so hard?”

“No, Barr. That doesn’t sound hard at all,” Joe says.

“Great. Now, I’m sure there are plenty of people who want to come check on me, including someone who’s probably listening in, so she can see me before getting back to her own Earth.”

Something falls over in the cortex, followed by an ‘oops’ that’s unmistakably Kara.

“You don’t have to see everyone right now, Scarlet,” Len says.

“Don’t want them all to see the Flash cuddling with Captain Cold?” I ask.

“You say that like it’s supposed to embarrass me. All I’m hearing is a reason I stole the most valuable thing life has to offer.”

“I swear, if you say my heart–”

“I stole the spot of your nemesis, after all.”

I groan. “You are not my nemesis. We’re married, Len. That means we can’t be nemeses.”

“Says who?”

“Says me. Just now. And I get to be right because I’m injured.”

“That’s not how that works.”

“Says who?”

“Me. And I get to be right because I’m the Flash’s favourite villain. And a master thief. And the luckiest man alive. Plus, I have this little beaker charm on my phone that says I married a complete dork.”

“Like you’d choose anyone else.”

“Never said I was complaining, Scarlet. If I ever act differently, assume I’m either being mind controlled or have been replaced by a fake.”

“If I have to rescue you, I’ll bring in the rest of Team Arrow, and all the Legends as well.”

Len laughs. “That’s a group who don’t know we’re together yet. I wonder if that Brit would’ve accepted the excuse ‘I can’t join you because I’m too busy keeping my future husband alive.’”

“He had to have known we were together. Gideon must’ve mentioned it when he was looking for possible Legends.”

“Maybe he couldn’t believe that someone who fought crime as both his day and night job married a renowned criminal.”

“What’s so hard to believe?” I ask.

You don’t need to know nearly as much about chemistry as I do to see that literally any of our early day interactions was overflowing with it.

“I don’t know, Scarlet. Loving you is as simple as taking candy from a baby, or cash from a bank, or diamonds from a–”

“I love you too, kleptomaniac and all.”

That launches Len into a spiel about the difference between a compulsion to steal and planning out a complex heist for the thrill of it, which has me smiling so much it’s easy to forget my newest scars and everything bad that led to us laying here. I’m sure there are plenty of people who are waiting for their turn at visiting, but for now, I’d rather lie here and listen to the many differences between Len and some common thief. It’s not like I’ve ever associated the word ordinary with him before anyway. When I was struck by lightning, I became the impossible. But Len, he doesn’t need powers to become that. He’s extraordinary through just being him. And I’ll always love him for that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finding an ending for this chapter was difficult. But I did, and with it, Inevitable is now finished. I'm still reeling from the amount of people who've read this, given kudos, and commented, unannounced hiatus in the middle of it and all. Thank you, thank you, thank you. You've all made my days better and brought a smile to my face. 
> 
> I'm looking forward to writing Part 3 of Ignoring the Hero Handbook, which will be called Moments and consist of different moments throughout Exceptions and Inevitable from that are from different POVs, happen between chapters or both. If you want me to cover a particular moment, then mention it in your comment, and I'll do my best to cover all suggestions. Word of warning though, Moments will be taking the lowest priority in my updating schedule where Inevitable took the highest. Things at uni are a bit chaotic right now, and will probably be that way all semester, but then I graduate in December (definitely freaking out over that), and will end up with a lot more free time. 
> 
> Thank you again for helping me get to 10,000 hits on one fic, and for joining me on my first time writing a story with a romance focus (second if you count Inevitable as separate). I'll hopefully have the first chapter for Moments out within the next month.


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